I did it to be true to myself.
I did it to be true to myself.
hi i want to tell someone but i am a loner and no friends so i've put it down to desperately wanting to go out dressed and i've got a new wig and make up so it could be soon ?love deanna b xx
I understand the desire to share my crossdressing with others but still want to maintain privacy. I think it's because I'm looking for feedback, recognition, acceptance.
the need to be seen in feme,for me its overwhelmingly strong and scary.out at nite in a dress driving around noplace to go but crazy,parks .quick dropins to p/o box in guirl mode hopeing to be seen.yeh they see me on the survailance cams im sure.I got cought one day a while back while shoping in male drab,at the grocery store I spotted a pair of slippers I liked so I bought them .at check out the girl said these would look nice on you"""I replied confidently I hope so.I would haved loved to chat with her GG.about the need to come out and be me . yeh then you have to consider s/s... social suicide.
I came an inch within finally revealing it to one of my best friends since highschool tonight, fortunately the subject somehow wandered away from my near revelation.
I dunno, half of me wants to to see which friends truly stick around, then the other half doesn't want to lose the ones I feel I have. For now I still leave my explanations at, "costuming" but it's expanded a little beyond that since then. :-/
Someday, someday.
I would love to tell lots of people,a couple know about my other side one is quite happy blackberry contact and one hates it wife (the cow) i dont get a lot of chances now to dress which does make me sad
I love being a gurl
I have met a few of the local people who are online on this forum. Such a relief to talk with a sister for coffee or lunch. And now a local support group. Network Trans Resource Group.
Also, I have told many thrift store clerks. Some call me by name whenever I step into the store. A few were just polite. Most were very cooperative and some even watch for special things they think I might want.
Take this for what it's worth, as this story ultimately led to my participation on this site...
I told a few friends because of the same urge to release the secret, but made sure they were people that lived far away (out of state) so a wrong turn would have minimal splash damage.
One of the people I told was a paranoid (diagnosed!) ex that was always trying get me to back together with her, despite knowing I was engaged (now married). It allowed us to become close. Unfortunately, I got too dependent on our secret talks. She disappeared for a while, but recently came back online. I started talking to her, but accidentally left the chat window up. Yup.
Needless to say, the wife read the convo and thought I was cheating on her. I was forced to come out of the dressing closet. It worked out, but I was convinced I was headed for divorce when I told her. We're still working through everything, but I'm at least hopeful and now feel incredibly free.
I was lucky. Others have been as well. Still, don't forget there's also the risk of everything going very very wrong.
It is always a thrill to out oneself to a totally safe stranger. But once you tell anyone you know that feeling of sharing may soon become a constant fear of your secret being shared with colse friends of you friend.
Untill your at a point where you can share it with a wife, girlfriend or SO, I'd stick to sharing only with people online or others you meet while out dressed. Approval is what we all seek but it has a Price
I told one of my GG friends about it. She told me she wasn't surprised, laughed, but then was supportive.
However, we are no longer friends due to other circumstances, so outside of here, no one knows.
I have been floating ideas that I dress to some of my female friends. I've come up with various reasons to bring it up -- I have to dress up for a party, my friend just found out her boyfriend dresses up, etc. After I've gotten them talking about it I've always asked "how would you feel if your boyfriend dressed up?" in the hopes I'd get an affirmative response. Unfortunately, most of them weren't really receptive to the idea.
I do want a friend I can confide in, not just because I want to have someone to talk to about dressing, but it would be great to have girl talk and to have someone to shop with and talk fashion! Until then I'm stuck with this board lol.
-Christie
Nope, not interested in opening that closet to anyone. I've got enough problems to deal with in my own personal life and there's really nothing to be gained by it. Then again, it's a lot heavier thing admitting you're trangendered to someone than simply a crossdresser, so it's a slightly different story for me.
A lot of info on this tread. I too have been dressing for over 50 years or so and wish now that I would have gotten a lot more comfortable with it when I was younger, but than 40 or 50 years ago, you might have been stoned if you were found out. My SO is very accepting of my dressing, as was my 1st wife. I do sometimes drive efemme, and do stop at waysides or to take a look in a store window. Do I want the world to know, it would be nice, but only a few people in this modern day society seem to understand how we as CD's feel. I did not ask for these feels, they just came about. I have a sister in law that knows, and you bet, it is nice to have someone that drops hints now and than about clothes and shoes and etc. But even though others have their own hang ups, they might be faster to judge us. Enjoy it, take a ride, and relax.
I'm with you on this. I think going through this would be easier with a natural female there to help me, and to be able to shop and fashion talk with.Originally Posted by christiecd
Can I just say that was brilliantly written? Thank you for that, Lexi!
I don't get the urge to dress that often, but do love it when I get to do it. For some time I've had the urge to tell my wife, but do not want non-crossdressers to know. I feel like telling my wife in the hopes that she'll be ok with it and I will have more time to dress!
I'm going to tell everyone sometime soon. Just waiting for an opening.
I don't have an urge to tell anyone, but if I were to come out I'd have a lot of explaining to do. I wouldn't want people to be uncomfortable and afraid to ask questions, or make wild speculations. I'd rather not become the next village idiot.
We seem to be a very "tell your wife!" group here, and I am definitely among that group. Odds are that your wife is going to find out eventually. Better to tell her sooner rather than later. But set your expectations correctly. I'd say expect for her NOT to be okay with it, and for there to be a big fight and lots of drama.
Who is "everyone" for you?
Last edited by Shelly Preston; 06-16-2011 at 07:02 AM. Reason: merged - please use the edit button
i've told my ex and just recently my gf.
both were shocked but its nothing to be worried about nor is it the kind that would damage or destroy our relationship.
what i did... after i was in bed with either as a man, i slowly hinted that i wanted to see them in stockings. they agreed, and i offered to wear with them. i gradually confessed that i did more than just wear pantyhose... i wore them with heels, gloves, and makeup... so far all is ok.
I wouldn't mind my friends finding out about my dressing habits. But I don't want to have to tell them, thats very draining. I'd rather just have them magically know somehow.
I was like that a few years ago. I encourage you to share with your close friends, slowly hint things see how they react to related items. If you think they can understand let them know. As you keep telling friends your confidence will get a huge boost! Girls are the best for this! Some of my girl friends want me to take them shopping when they loose some weight, I cannot wait!
One guy I work with knows and he has seen me in tonnes of my outfits as we played video games together, its an incredible feeling to come out (playing shooter games on Xbox in heels is kind of cool when your buddy is right there). Right now most of the girl 'friends' know about my dressing. 2 of the guy friends know. All of which are fine with it.
Jacqueline
My clothes ... well half of them.
Hm...now and then. I'm out to two close friends, but it's not something they can really relate to, and I'm living with my parents whom I'm closeted with. I think life would be easier if I could tell my family about it, but I just don't think that would be a smart thing to do right now. I agree that the long stretches of no dressing sharpen the wish, which also compells you to want to tell the people you're closeted with.
It's funny. My mom has always lived by her own rules, sometimes to her detriment, and always advises other people to do that and to be true to themselves no matter what, but if she knew about this, she definitely would not tell me to live by my own rules. Sometimes the biggest lie ever is a demand for total honesty.
my wife is the only person that i know of that knows,she sometimes encourages it,wanting me to do a fashion show for her,,when we are shopping and has to go to the restroom,she laughs saying i know where youll be,"window shopping" we call it.unfortunatly shes not always in the mood to talk about it,see me dressed or hear about an outfit im excited about.I have very few friends i could come out to so thats the reason i found this place,,hoping to find someone to share this with,talk about clothes,or tell them how i went fishing at a local park,with my fem clothes on underneath my jeans,and had the chance to shed them and fish ala-fem,
Do bag yourself an SO like mine. Oh ya!
Spoken for me with panache, Jan. Since only my SO knows, and just today she told me my fingernails are like, "fangs," I simply let my swinging "fanny" do the talk'en for me now.I will not tell my family members. I think only one may accept my crossdressing. My wife knows and is SUPER supportive of it and helps me a whole lot. The urge does hit me at times to tell someone, then I realize all of you know!
That being said, it is very lonely at the "Top" of anything, Gurly. You will feel "Oh so much better," when you do find that someone you are inquiring about?
How to go about it? Dunno, sorry! But, best of luck, and good hunting! Oh, and do bag yourself an SO like mine. Oh ya!
Happiness always, and Hugs,
M.
Last edited by Misti; 06-17-2011 at 10:11 PM.
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