One Thing I Don't Understand. . . . .

[RachelOKC]

For you Seinfeld fans..."Jimmy might have a compound fracture! Jimmy's going into shock!"

I don't get the third person self-referral either but to each their own I suppose. It does irk me a bit when someone says, "How's Rachel? Rachel's wearing a lovely necklace. What's Rachel been up to? Rachel looks like she's about to bop Berthilda over the head with a copy of Strunk and White."

"Yeah...um, Rachel's right here. Me. I'm Rachel. 'You.' You can say 'you.' Rachel? 'You.' Well, not YOU you, but ME you. Rachel? 'You.' Ewe? Rachel? Never mind, terrible pun."

Anyhoo, I'm me. Not some third party. Unless I'm not present. One wonders.

[Delila]

While I rarely refer to myself in third person as Delila I find that I do have two personalities that are apparent. When I am around "the guys" I will act much differently then when I am around someone that I am out to. I think it is really just an easy way of saying "I got to let my real self out tonight" rather than a regular night where you pretend to be masculine.

[2SpeedTranny]

One thing I don't understand is how people refer to their fem side. People say things like "when I let Sarah out" or "When Sarah comes out", I see this as kind of strange. It's like a good portion of us are schizophrenic or something.

It could be that they're still ashamed of that part of themselves, haven't accepted themselves, and can't bring themselves to use "I" or "me." The part they're ashamed of becomes compartmentalized, and can pass off responsibility for their actions on an alternate personality. Eh, it's a theory, and I'm sure some shrink somewhere has already thought of it.

Either way, it comes off as somewhat disturbing.

[VioletJourney]

I think when discussing your male and female sides it's just simpler to refer to yourself in the third person.

[Kate Simmons]

Think of it as a sort of "roundhouse" such as used to be utilized for servicing locomotives. The mind has many modules and we sometimes wear a lot of "hats". We don't wear them all the time, however, and "tap into" or "wheel into" different aspects or specialties of ourselves as needed. If we had this all at once , all the time it would be pretty confusing. All of the aspects are "us" in any case. The difference between most folks and those with DID is that normally we can do this consciously as needed rather than totally assuming another persona that must take over entirely.

[sometimes_miss]

Men have a very good capacity for compartmentalizing our lives, and I think what you see on these websites is evidence of that. Using a different name makes it even easier to fool themselves into believing it's not the 'real' person we are.

[Danni Renee]

I am at the stage where I go both ways. Most of the time I refer to myself as just me, regardless of how I am dressed. Other times, when I want to be very specific when talking with my SO, I talk in terms of my guy name and my gal name. It is not that I feel like I am two people (well I do not feel that way anymore), it is just that using both names allows me to be specific in what I am talking about.

[Sarasometimes]

One thing I don't understand is how people refer to their fem side. People say things like "when I let Sarah out" or "When Sarah comes out", I see this as kind of strange. It's like a good portion of us are schizophrenic or something.

The way I explained it to my friend, when I told her about my CDing, was that I am and always will be the exact same person as you've always known. The fact that I CD does not mean I am a different person, want to talk about different things, or want to be treated any differently. I am the exact same person no matter how I am dressed that day. We can still talk about the dirtbags that live next door, how your day was, and about sports and politics. I don't need to live any differently and I certainly don't have to talk about ponies and flowers when I am dressed.

Am I the only one who thinks this way? Why the insistence that we as CD's are fractured individuals?

I see a therapist mainly to better understand and manage my crossdressing on a day to day basis since I'm closeted. just last week I asked her the difference between CDing and schizophrenia. She said the latter is uncontrolled. The personality change is drastic and unpredictable. I agree that we are all just one personality but many of us feel uneasy expressing all the aspects of that one personality in many settings. The other day i was watching The Amazing race and the dad in the dad/daughter team said his daughter is a tomboy but that she also knows how to dance. I don't know of a similar term for males with female traits? Genrally tomboy are looked at favorably. As a child I once used the term tomgirl and I was told that isn't a real word. Great thread!

[Pythos]

Well, I am pretty much the same person when in a skirt, or pants. When fully fem, it really is only in looks, and perhaps movement. But I am still me. It is actually quite liberating feeling to be talking the latest aviation news, or some technicalities of some aircraft or machine when wearing pantyhose, leggings, nice boots and a dressy shirt, or better yet when in hose skirt and heels, blouse, make up, and wig. I know I have surprised some people with my knowledge base despite appearances. I am the embodiment of "never judge a book by its cover"

[BillieJoEllen]

I'm 100% me, 100% of the time. However I do seem to have two distinct personalities. There is me (male) and there is me (female). I think differently and act differently depending on who I am at the moment. I refer to me as me and Billie as Billie.

[Maria Blackwood]

One thing I don't understand is how people refer to their fem side. People say things like "when I let Sarah out" or "When Sarah comes out", I see this as kind of strange. It's like a good portion of us are schizophrenic or something.

We're all fascinating little jeweled puzzle boxes.

I'm a complete whole with many facets, and I sometimes I rotate it so that the light glints off of certain facets more than others.

It's why I can wear my sexiest lingerie all the while taking down noobs in the Gears Of War 3 beta. ;-)

[tabithavalentine]

Like some others have said, I refer to Tabitha as a different person because I feel like a different person when I dress. There's a different mentality. I've sometimes worried I'd develop mental issues as a result, but I like to think I'm grounded enough to know who I am.

That's what my other personalities tell me anyway

[juno]

It is normal for people to have multiple personalities. That is why "Multiple Personality Disorder" was renamed "Dissociative Identity Disorder". It is only a mental illness when the personalities are independent. A crossdresser wants to behave as a man when dressed as a male, and as a woman when dressed as female. To get this right, one has to really develop separate personalities.

For me, I believe that my male personality is primarily the left hemisphere, and the female personality is primarily the right hemisphere. People with extreme epilepsy have had surgery to sever the corpus callosum joining the two hemispheres. The hemispheres then exhibit independent identities. The corpus callosum is smaller in men, so I suspect that many male crossdressers have gender identities that are somewhat divided among the left and right hemispheres.

[2SpeedTranny]

It's why I can wear my sexiest lingerie all the while taking down noobs in the Gears Of War 3 beta. ;-)

Thank you for helping me swear off gaming! *shudder*

[eluuzion]

Me, myself, I, and she asked Eluuzion and she said the term for that is illeism (act of referring to oneself in the third degree). The “meaning” depends upon the circumstances in which it is used. It is a popular approach used by authors in text media. It is a common well-adjusted stage seen in 2-4 year old children with “invisible friends”. It can become a tool used by adults to accomplish various objectives. Etc...etc...

There are disorders (NPD) narcissistic personality disorder, schizophrenia as well as a few others where the patient can display this behavior. There are also people that display this behavior that have no confirmed clinical diagnosis of any disorder.

There are explanations that lack the magical and mystical romance of fairy dust interventions altering cognitive processes. They provide logical and document able explanations of personal agendas and creative strategies of people trying to ultimately erase the connection between their actions and their accountability for them.

It takes many forms and varies in intensity from basic concealment to the creation of an "invisible friend" that is capable of independent thought and actions out of their control.
It is all about creating distance from your actions by shifting blame away from yourself in order to escape the guilt and consequences of your behavior.

In this case, the ultimate objective might be to create a game with a rule that states that any time you put on a dress, you become exempt from any ownership of your actions or the consequences that always follow. It is much more “real” and entertaining when played on the internet than it is playing it in the F2F world of “real life”.

"It wasn't me...it was her".

Just another personal "theory" that may be applicable to a few, many or nobody. I predict it won’t be a popular one on this forum,
It is not specific to crossdressing. It can relate to many issues in life. I am just sharing thoughts, not pointing a finger at anyone.

HaveFun/BeHappy,
Me, Myself, I, her ...and eluuzion

[sissystephanie]

I only have one body and one mind. So no matter what clothing I am wearing I am still the same person! Unless some of you have a magical way to change your body, you too are the same person under the cloak of your femme personality! You may want to think you are a different person, but you are not!! Call it the way it is, not the way you want it to be!!

[Rachel Morley]

I'm with you ... I never refer to myself in the third perosn when talking about my femme self. I like to think that I am just the same person all the time, it's just that sometimes I am presenting as a female, and so like to think of myself as female, and so I try to act appropriately female too. In boy mode it's the same but it's toned down a bit .. especially at work and especially my clothes, hair and makeup