[SIZE="2"]“...sweet discourse, the banquet of the mind” (Dryden)
“I'm me...and I don't give a rat's a**” (NathalieX66)
That last quote really bothers me, so I thought I would start a discussion about it – that IS OK isn’t it? This is a discussion forum, right? Oh, to be filled with apathy, unconcerned and wholly indifferent to anything that may spark a little interest about one’s existence! Unfortunately for you all, I am imbued with a healthy interest in anything that may influence my crossdressing, so I come here to write about it. The idea is to consider the pros and cons of a subject via writing, in the hopes of meeting other discussers who may also think about their own circumstances. At this time, I would like to offer the idea of discussion itself as a discussible subject. This is NOT meant to be an elaborate dissertation, even though I will seek to illustrate the idea at hand through words. Perhaps if I say, “let’s run it up the flagpole and see who salutes...” you will more easily understand the nature of this discussion, and where I happen to be coming from...
Yeah, I came here to discuss MtF crossdressing , because I know something about it – silly me! The desire to crossdress originates in many different places, and many different ways, according to whatever circumstances gave rise to this blessed gift. Maybe you don’t think it was “blessed” at all, so right off the bat you’re at odds with anything I have to say – that’s OK, but a space has been provided to be filled in with words, so I’m going to use it as I see fit. I love to crossdress, period, and I automatically love those males-by-birth who feel the same way about it. Feelings may be the key word in this piece, because lack of interest, or being destitute in feeling, leads to apathy (see above). Personally, I can’t imagine NOT feeling euphoria when I crossdress (pardon the double negative), nor can I fathom why someone would go to all the trouble of expressing apathy in a place like this. I know I’m lifting something out of context, but I’m not alone in doing that, am I?
I came to this forum to meet other crossdressers (of all types), and hopefully find a few who share my own appreciation for the “magic” of wearing the wrong clothes – in my case, I’m a male who wears (and enjoys wearing) women’s clothing, so I’m looking for some kindred spirits. I’ve found many in the past two years, since I became active on this site and overcame my initial reluctance to take the plunge. I knew what I was getting myself into, since I had already endured a forum much like this one – it’s a lot like trying to obtain a little sunlight way down here on the dark forest floor, while all around me the tall trees hold sway with their overreaching limbs and persistent attitudes. That sentence may be too flowery for you pragmatists, but it’s a good analogy, since a lot of members have come and gone, perishing in this stifling atmosphere of anti-discussion...
“Too harsh,” I can hear you say, but I miss the many special friends I’ve found, only to lose them when they become disillusioned with some things they read on this site. This is going on right now, as I write this, but do you care? Does your apathy constitute support for crossdressing or other crossdressers? I may have a thicker skin, calloused from many encounters with non-imaginative members here and elsewhere, but even I get disillusioned – if someone submits a suitable topic for discussion, it is promptly targeted, distorted, torn down, or dismissed in written form, meaning someone has taken the time to dash another member’s hopes or dreams. Why? I guess if you’re apathetic about your own circumstances, you will pass that lack of feeling along and eagerly pull the rug out from anyone who dares to love what they do. It makes me sad when a beautiful person, MtF crossdresser or not, gets summarily crushed in this manner. It’s the school playground all over again, replete with bullies and a general disregard for discussion, intelligence, introspection, or...gasp...beauty itself....
Believe me, I’ve been pleased with the level of discussion on this site, and heartened by the many positive responses to the threads I, and others, have initiated. I try to respond to other member’s threads with equal support and reinforcement, conscious of the fact that the individual may not be here very long – they (in fact everyone, other than the aforementioned apathists) need to be supported with kind words now and then. After all, for some, the act of crossdressing is fraught with fear or difficulty. The fact that I’ve been active here for nearly two years is indicative of the unfathomable depth of possible subjects for discussion – anything can relate to crossdressing, and I see connections all over the place. Even everyday events can be heightened and made special by the mere presence of crossdressing. I’m sure some of you are thinking “BIG DEAL,” but, to many of us, life is enhanced by crossdressing and that enhancement is, in itself, worthy of discussion...
You know, I could write a different way, and fire off a pithy sentence with an accompanying smiley or two (no doubt undermining my own words), but this is how I write. We visual artists have to write things called “artist’s statements,” declarations of intent where the painter, sculptor, printmaker, or whomever describes why he or she makes the work in question, or how he or she feels about the creative process. I don’t like to write about my own artwork, nor do I like to write artist’s statements, but I DO like to write about crossdressing – oddly enough, both subjects tend to be equally mysterious. Maybe crossdressing, in its MtF form, is more tangible to me, yet it exists in secrecy, away from the mainstream of society (unlike Art) and thus attractive in its apart-ness. There’s a lot of writing about art, and a lot of it is dense and unfriendly – there’s a plethora of dense, clinical writing about crossdressing, too, which is why this place is so valuable for those who LIKE to crossdress. Whenever I read, “I love to crossdress” by a newbie, I can barely suppress a smile, but when I read, “I don’t care...” I don’t smile at all...
So, in closing, I would like to encourage those members who are intimidated by what they read to come forth and generate some worthwhile discussion on any topic. What YOU think is worthwhile may be just the ticket, a breath of fresh air to dispel the clouds and return light to the dark forest floor we inhabit. Frankly, I’m surprised I’m still here, writing these overly long pieces, but I mainly write to relax – the only time I contemplate leaving the site is when my artwork demands my undivided attention, and it is tugging at my skirt hem constantly. Which reminds me – I could write endlessly about how nice my skirt feels, or how my panties are hugging my scrotum just-so, or how the cool air is circulating around my knees, but I’d rather explore the origins of how I came to dress this way, or why I feel the need to preserve my secretive activity, or why I can’t walk down the street in a small mid-Kansas town without upsetting the status quo. I like to discuss subjects like this because the answers are not easy to come by, nor will they be forthcoming in the foreseeable future. Meanwhile, I must say I LOVE to crossdress, but you already knew that...
For those of you who hate lengthy, verbose discourses, I will translate:
I’m here to DISCUSS crossdressing, so let’s have a DISCUSSION about it, OK???
Thanks for reading, and to all my imaginative, loving, and invariably silent friends, here’s a heartfelt hug for you:
Love, Freddy[/SIZE]
Originally Posted by steftoday
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