Quote Originally Posted by kellycan27 View Post
Take it to PM ladies.. you're walking on what may end up to be a good thread.
Thank you doll, not every discussion is intended to include everyone. This one is for trans-women because that's my own experience and I wouldn't even imagine that I could speak to any of the issues that trans-men face.

Now back to the point.

Since I've started my little blog, I've had the pleasure (mostly) of corresponding with a few CD's who would ask me for advice about transitioning. Why ask me? Who in the heck knows, but I have my own domain name so I must know what I'm talking about right? ;-)

Anyhoo, I've come to the conclusion over the last year that CDs and TSs are very different people, coming from very different places. I've gotten to where I can get a pretty good sense of a TS vs CD just by the things they talk about. Take Kellycan for example. She and I have chatted many many times over the last couple of years and I've come to adore her like a real life friend. She was my first real TS acquaintance and I noticed something different about her but I couldn't really tell what it was. Aside from being a mouthy broad, I didn't really know why she stood out from my CD friends.

Well, time ticks by and I meet many new people both in person and online and after a while I start to notice a definite pattern. My list of NOTs (which were explained quite nicely by Melody) are simply the things that inform or motivate or otherwise preoccupy the thoughts of a cross dresser. None of those things are bad nor should they be avoided but are any of them the reason for transitioning or for NOT transitioning?

Some girls don't think they should because they don't want or can't afford the SRS. Well, like I told my therapist, I was called a sissy, and a pansy, and a girl when I was a kid and no one bothered to check my pants to see if they were right. My pickle didn't make me a man, so not having it isn't gonna make me a woman. My genitals don't define me now and they won't define me later. Should I not transition because I don't really care if I have an innie or an outtie?

Kel, you were ready to open a can on me because you thought I was being a hypocrite, but was I really? Let's talk about passing. I know that you and I agree that passing is absolutely worth the effort and you of course pass as if you were born that way, but what if you didn't? What if you were taller and bigger? What if your hands were huge and your voice was deep? Would you NOT transition? Do you spend your life crackin' beers with your buds and pretending to like fart jokes because passing is more difficult or do you live your life anyway in spite of not passing well? I think DawnMarie said it all when she said Being a TS is about being who you are.

Beth-Lock compared my questions to a Sophistic play on words, but I prefer to see the exercise as more Socratic, in the sense that the unexamined life is indeed not worth living, and above all one should know thyself.