I never started crossdressing until after age 40. I have always been interested in feminine things, but somehow it never included women's clothes. I used to frequently wear sexy men's underwear, like the stuff you can get at places like Undergear. Some of that gets pretty close to being panties.
When I first started wearing panties, I never hid it from my wife. But, my first panties were similar enough to the men's underwear I had, that she did not immediately realize that they were women's.
When I first tried a bra, I bought a cheap one for less than $5. When I put it on, I immediately showed my wife. She was not that happy about it, but she could see how it made me feel.
The first time I put on makeup, I did lipstick, eye shadow, and mascara, put on a cheap costume wig (all that I had at the time), a nice skirt and blouse, and showed my wife. She said "Oh my god! ... Hey, you look pretty good."
I believe that honesty in a relationship is more important than anything. Maybe I even share too much, but I think that total honesty can never hurt as much as dishonesty.
I am very lucky to have started crossdressing after I got married, and to have the courage to be open about it. It has not been free of problems, but keeping secrets would have been far worse. Of course, my wife wants me to keep it secret from most of our friends, family, and work. I want to tell everyone, because it makes no sense to me to feel shame about being myself. So, I try to be discreet for her sake.
I am wondering if anyone else here has never dressed in secret. I know that I am unusual, but surely there must be others out there that never felt shamed into hiding their desires.
