It’s all about procreation, isn’t it?

[kimdl93]

As with most things, a certain set of people will assume, incorrectly, that being a CDer means something else. And I do think that societal attitudes are a reflection of the selfish genes that strive for replication. (We're little different from bacteria in that regard.) As a successful procreator (and grand procreator...if that's what you are when you have grand kids)...I know that being a CD doesn't necessarily present an obstacle to reproduction.

Also, not every species demands successful reproduction from every adult. Look at any number of social animals, from ants to wolves. You'll see that some members of the community abstain from reproduction in order to enhance the succesfful survival of others...usually their siblings. The gene gets what it wants ---viable offspring--- and males of the species play specialized roles, sometimes not typically associated with reproductive males. Think of submissive male wolves who hunt and care for the offspring of the Alpha couple.

[Jennaie]

I certainly can see how the pressures of what is expected of us by society can influence our actions and decisions, but what about that guy who has done it all, who no longer has a family and lives alone. He's retired, has no one to answer to and still hides his dressing in the closet, is that about procreation?

[Maria2004]

Finally, it's been said. dis-regarding all the reams of text and over analysis. We live, therefore we have sex, turn the page.

[TGMarla]

We live, therefore we have sex

I'll have to remember to try that line on my wife!

[drushin703]

frederique;
i agree with you entirely. Crossdressing is not synonymous with child hating. My delima is that although I love kids, I only like girls a little tiny bit.

There was a new story of a black guy in North Carolina who had fathered 22 children by 16 different women, with all the mothers and children
recieving some form of state assitance.A great many women shook their heads in disgust, while also giving a wink to his virility. NEWS FLASH,
WOMEN WANT BABIES!. Whatever their psychological state of mine, or whatever their intentions (and love is an intention), the end result is
to further this 4 billion people throng and to carry on this civilization.Of all the things I am or have been called, viril is not one of them.No
surprise to me that most women, hitherto, have chosen others to father their children.
I dress up in womens cloths! There, I admit it.I have always done it, even befor the thought of girls or relationships, sex or companionship
I did it.Now what Frederique, unsuitability? Isnt suitability, even the parental kind, a learned and practiced behavour?
I arranged the dresses in my closet today by color, bought a new shade of lipstick, tried Covergirl foundation, shaved my legs again
even thought they didnt need it, brushed the lint from my wig, arched my eyebrows, cried for no good reason, goodled Amerie and danced
in front of my mirror from 12 oclock till two.Now ime tired as hell........so I shall sleep and dream, not of children, but of the angels
of Chagall..........................sissification forever, dana.

[Kaitlyn26]

Have you ever been told to always go with the first answer that pops into your head on a test? It's for a reason. The more you think about it, the more you can talk yourself into anything. The first answer I have when I read the thread title is that people fear that which is different. I think I'm right and you're thinking too much. By your thinking those that dislike MtF cross dressers should also dislike those that openly proclaim they do not want children. Yet it's never been proven that those opposed to having children get anymore attention from the general public than anyone else.

[Suzette Muguet de Mai]

My, my what a mind you have Frederique. Your second last paragraph read like a chapter in my life. I still have to put up with why are you single, why have you not provided an heir to the family name, why have I no grandchildren. Maybe partial reason why I refuse to go to family reunions because the questions become pertinent. They are repetitive and produce no constructive discussion, only some sarcastic snare that brings a tint of joy to those who listen to my replies.
Not all of us have children, nor do we have a partner so I am glad to see you outline a few various people here. Shy? yes no trust in anyone? yes most definitely. Desire to meet someone new? if it happens ok, the world is not going to collapse if it never happens.
Do I like kids? I have no honest answer. I think children and their attitude to life and others depend heavily on parents and social moulds. I see many older people in hospitals now who are alone in their wards. No visitors at all despite their children living in the same city. I also see some instances where the parents are still loved so dearly that I would have liked to have a child or two to love me too.
It is the only reason why I would have liked to have had children and yes, I did have a chance to procreate but my beautiful lady at the time was career minded and I respected her for her needs. Maybe if I had children things may have been different, maybe not but it would have been nice to be accepted readily into family reunions as everybody gloated over my partner and my baby and when I look over to the family members, I see a look of contentment as I am accepted without any issues about who I am not. Unfortunately that has not happened and I become the basis for another discussion of "Is he gay? Is he a pervert? Is he really our relative?

NO I AM ME and accept me as I am.

Again a very good post Frederique. You promote thoughts that one can use to see from many directions of who I am.

[Gaby2]

Finally, it's been said. dis-regarding all the reams of text and over analysis. We live, therefore we have sex, turn the page.

Well said, Maria... though I'm (possibly) not having sex right now because this thread has been enthralling me.

Firstly, don't be , Freddy!

You hit on a personal favourite of mine... (among many others, I might add):

[SIZE="2"]For most people, i.e. outsiders, the problem with MtF crossdressing is its implied effect on procreation – you’re supposed to be fruitful and multiply, which involves being attractive to, and attracted by, the opposite sex, and it is expected that you will replicate yourself and your spouse with several jointly created replacements..,
Let’s say you’re a heterosexual male, and you like to wear women’s clothing – can I hear an AMEN? The need to procreate may lie at the heart of your desire to keep your secrets secret...
Let’s say you crossdressed in the past, and then tucked it away long enough to get the girl, get married, and generate a few offspring. You’ve done the deed, lived up to the expectations of society, and created a few copies of yourself (or your spouse). Well done, but something is missing – the girl you suppressed longs to get “out” again, and her impending appearance will certainly cause friction with your wife and children...
[/SIZE]

"The expectations of society" is a very apt formulation that covers many reasons why my wonderful 20-year-marriage ended up defunct.

After my second child was born, I knew from the bottom of my heart that I was facing a tough decision to have a vasectomy or run the very real risk of having one or more children as time goes by.
(And that not necessarily with my Ex!)
The decision to have the operation was helped along by the fact that my Ex was on strong medication at the time.
After the operation I felt a sense of release from "a desire to procreate".

Despite being a proud and extremely happy stay-at-home Dad, I was chronically underworked as a musician, which made me .
This led to mild though potentially dangerous alcohol problems... I eventually gave alcohol up for four years.
The kids grew older and my secretive CDing became more intense. AMEN.
I can confirm your "friction" statement.
Eventually I decided to separate - the separation took two years in all.

Gaby simply needed to get out.
Just like with my kids... the start was the hardest part.
It is indeed all about procreation...
in many ways I'm Gaby's parent!
Gaby

[docrobbysherry]

I remember reading of an interesting study in my college Sociology class.

A male and female rat were put in a cage. They had sex and reproduced. Then, they and their babies reproduced. They were given unlimited amounts of food and water, but left in the same cage. After a while, the cage was jammed packed with rats! The rats quite having sex and reproducing. They began to die off and no new babies were born. Finally, at the end, there were only a few rats left. Still, they didn't have sex or reproduce and eventually ALL DIED!

So, how many human rats can FIT ON THIS EARTH? It won't happen in OUR life time. But, maybe our grand kids, or great grand kids will STOP HAVING SEX!

Then, just before the end, will gays and CDs become the NORM on the planet?