I don't think that we are critical enough of each other.

[Loretta]

Everyone's too nice.
It's not realistic.
Constructive criticism is part of acceptance and support.
It just makes me a little mad when someone posts something (where it's obvious they weren't really trying for a passable image), and get nothing but niceties back.
I thought that the whole point of being a crossdresser was to avoid looking like a man in a dress, that's all.
When somebody posts a picture, where it's obvious that they barely even tried, and people comment on how beautiful and feminine they look, I die a little inside.
It just seems so fake when something like that happens.

/end rant.

[sandra-leigh]

Last time I posted pictures, I think I got a total of three responses, all fairly short, with 2 of the 3 complimenting the clothes rather than me. If that is getting "nothing but niceties back" then please allow me to retain my last remaining delusions.

And no, the point of being a crossdresser is not "to avoid looking like a man in a dress". Men in dresses are part of our community too.

[TGMarla]

No one wants to post pictures in order to be simply torn down. Many of us have issues with our self-confidence to begin with. "You look like a fat guy in a dress. And toss in a razor, dude!" does not sit well with a lady who's trying her best with what she has. Sometimes one of us will post a request for constructive criticism, and at those times, we do well with guidance and tips for her on how she may be able to maximize her attributes, diminish her disadvantages, and look the best she can.

But unless a girl asks for such criticism, very few of us have much wiggle room to go tearing into one another.

[wanagione]

I think we take so many pitures of ourselves is to validate how we feel inside to what we want to show the world. True, not everyone is a fashion model, but it's true in the GG world too. We all are in the journey at different speeds and levels. I like to see all the pictures i can. I think it gives hope to the girls out there that are still struggeling to find themselves or to take that step out the door. So if someone asks for constructive critisism, you can give it, but respectfully. that's my 2 cents.

PS I would post pictures of myself if i could figure out how to do it.

[AmandaJ]

The honesty is hidden. For example, if someone's pictures get ALOT of comments and the thread keeps going, it's usually because they look good. I've noticed more often than not the less passable pictures get a few comments, but then slip into oblivion.

Not trying to offend anyone, that's just the way it see it as a mostly observer of this site.

[Eryn]

PS I would post pictures of myself if i could figure out how to do it.

It isn't hard, and this board is particularly nice in that it automatically hosts the images for you!

When posting, bring up the advanced window (if you aren't already in one) and scroll down a bit. Click on the Manage Attachments button. A window will pop up that allows you to browse your computer for the image you want to attach to your post. Find those images and click the upload button. Once that is done, you can submit your post normally and your pictures will tag along.

There are restrictions to image size. Maximum is 500 pixels high by 600 wide. If your images are larger than that you have to scale them down.

Now, on to the question at hand. If someone doesn't ask for criticism I don't give it. This forum has a positive personality and I don't want to ruin that.

Imagine meeting a GG in real life. Let's say that she is wearing a horrible-looking top. Do you point that out? Of course not. You either say nothing or you compliment something else.

Now, if she says "what do you think of this outfit?" I might say something like "Perhaps you might want to consider different alternatives to that top" but not go into specifics unless she asks for them.

The same philosophy applies to the ladies here.

Eryn

[docrobbysherry]

So, is this a, "Wow! Does THIS picture stink", thread, Loretta? If so, here's MY contribution!

56535.jpg

[Katrina Black]

So, is this a, "Wow! Does THIS picture stink", thread, Loretta? If so, here's MY contribution!

56535.jpg

i ushally delete those pictures before they ever get out of my camera,, for every good picture i show there are 50 that would scare small children and weak at heart old men

[Cynthia Anne]

If I can not speak well of you, I shall not speak ill of you! Hugs!

[Philipa Jane]

Sherry that picture is Amazing



Very tongue in cheek no offense meant.
PJ

[Miss Maxine]

So, is this a, "Wow! Does THIS picture stink", thread, Loretta? If so, here's MY contribution!

56535.jpg

I feel like I should break out some more of my green track suit pics...

[Kaitlyn26]

I've asked for constructive criticism before. I didn't get any. Which means I'm either amazing (yea right), or everyone is scared that I'll rip their head off.

[sterling12]

We could make an exception starting with you!!!!!

Try to imagine a thread where about a hundred of us "piled on." And also imagine we were in male thinking mode: "You look like crap!" "Your too fat!" "Your face is too square, you look like a guy with makeup on!" Do you sort of get The Idea? None of that's true to my mind, but I have seen similar "hatchet jobs" on other sites.

We're not here to "tear in to somebody." The line between objective criticism and really hurting someone is very thin. Every once in a while somebody asks nicely and it's obvious that if we are very, very, careful we can help. But, you won't hear "blinding honesty," and that's probably a good thing.

Besides that, just figure we look for the best in everyone....so to all of us, each and every gurl is B-A-Ute-E-Fool!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Miss Maxine]

I've asked for constructive criticism before. I didn't get any. Which means I'm either amazing (yea right), or everyone is scared that I'll rip their head off.

Perhaps both? Personally, I kinda wanna see you in action. Nothing more exciting than a good spiteful decapitation.

[Miss Maxine]

We could make an exception starting with you!!!!!

Try to imagine a thread where about a hundred of us "piled on." And also imagine we were in male thinking mode: "You look like crap!" "Your too fat!" "Your face is too square, you look like a guy with makeup on!" Do you sort of get The Idea? None of that's true in my mind, but I have seen similar "hatchet jobs" on other sites.

We're not here to "tear in to somebody." The line between objective criticism and really hurting someone is very thin. Every once in a while somebody asks nicely and it's obvious that if we are very, very, careful we can help. But, you won't hear "blinding honesty," and that's probably a good thing.

Besides that, just figure we look for the best in everyone....so to all of us, each and every gurl is B-A-Ute-I-Fool!

Peace and Love, Joanie

Oooo! Can I start? I think this thread is total rubbish! Booyah! Next...

[Kaitlyn26]

Perhaps both? Personally, I kinda wanna see you in action. Nothing more exciting than a good spiteful decapitation.

I already made a pics thread. No one said much.

Loretta, your wig front is too far down, your clothes are not age appropriate, and your makeup is atrocious. A complete lack of effort, as I can replicate that look in 15 minutes. How much support did you get from that?

/end tough love

Just to expand on the point in case you're not getting it. Saying something like that to someone is defined as a "d*** move" among guys, and probably has a less crude definition among women. We don't do "d*** moves" because they're not very nice, and can often result in the offender being removed from the boy's club, or the main target for any insults for the rest of the social event.

[Miss Maxine]

I already made a pics thread. No one said much.

I hope I did. If I did, I must have been nice, as I still have my head. ^_^

*hurries off to check*

[suzy1]

For some it takes a lot of courage to post a picture of themselves here.
When I see a picture of a member that has obviously taken a lot of effort to look as good as they can then I appreciate it.
So I will complement them not only on there look but on the effort they have made.

When someone posts a picture having made little or no effort to look good then that’s different and I agree with you.

There is a balance to be found between constructive criticism and hurting a members feelings. And hurting member’s feelings is not what this forum is all about.

A little kindness and empathy would be good Loretta.
If you “die a little inside” when reading some of the complements then this is not the forum for you.

SUZY

[Loretta]

I already made a pics thread. No one said much.

Loretta, your wig front is too far down, your clothes are not age appropriate, and your makeup is atrocious. A complete lack of effort, as I can replicate that look in 15 minutes. How much support did you get from that?

/end tough love

Just to expand on the point in case you're not getting it. Saying something like that to someone is defined as a "d*** move" among guys, and probably has a less crude definition among women. We don't do "d*** moves" because they're not very nice, and can often result in the offender being removed from the boy's club, or the main target for any insults for the rest of the social event.

You...
Did read the part where I said "constructive" criticism, did you not?
Anyway, I can take your criticism.
I'm hardly passable as it is. The fact that I'm using a $5 halloween wig and hand-me-down clothes in that picture probably doesn't help matters all that much. That, and that that was my first attempt at applying makeup without help.
But hey! At least I can improve on said flaws, now that someone has pointed them out to me!
So thanks!

[kimdl93]

I usually refrain from making constructive comments because im still unsure of my own looks and skills. Glass houses, ya know.

[lisakay]

I'll go w gentle support for 200 please!

[Jocelyn Quivers]

Being that I am a very sensitive person myself, my rule has always been if unable to say anything positive or nice, say nothing at all. I know I would feel horrible in recieving negative comments, (unless I am asking for a very honest and upfront critque) and I would truly hope to never intentionally do the same to someone else. I also rarely if ever comment on pictures more so because I can usually never articulate the propper meaing or comment.

[Staci G]

MY picture threads must be pretty bad, I generally get maybe 2-5 comments and that's it. I am ok with this I figure one day I might get it right and look great in a set of pics. When that happens all will be right with the world, (yeah right). I love when someone suggest something different I can try it out on some of my GG friends before I post them, I can try them on here and get no replys and I know it's not working for me. But Loretta, I have seen post in here where the posting party is torn to shreds because of an unbelievable story line, so be careful what you ask for you might just get it.

[Sandra]

There is a difference in being critical and how it is said, and being down right rude. If I see a pic and want to say something then I will, and it will be along the lines of "well how about trying this " or " you could try this"

One thing I always think of is when members post " oh you're hot and pass so well" when the person doesn't pass, it give false hopes, and then if that member goes out and gets ridiculed, how are they going to feel.?

[Joanna41]

I'm one that will post pictures on here...I think I'm about 70% passable but I never get comments on how to improve either...I agree though there are a lot of comments made that are sheer feeling savers I will call it. If someone posts pictures of course I'm gonna lookand see. However if I don't like what I see I'm probably not gonna reply to the post plain and simple. Maybe in some small way people that don't comment on a post with pictures says it all? I do try to find things in those pictures to comment on but a lot of times I can't...but in the end we are all here together to get advice and learn how to be prettier. I know I still have a very long way to go but I'm enjoying my own personal journey with my finace...

Joanna