Hello there!
I joined ages ago...then self confidence dropped- so I disappeared, now decided to see if I can sustain the confidence & see this crossdressing thing through to whatever the best outcome is. (or Shaun from Shaun of the Dead would say "and wait for all this to blow over.")
I dressed from the age of 12, originally because I was & still am of the same build as the type of girls I go for (IE: petite.) When I was without a girlfriend, I was a sort of surrogate. Suddenly all changed when I was 23...and suddenly crossdressing became more about the fun of putting together outfits. I still only did it behind closed doors however & without any real effort. Then, last year, everything changed. I discovered Japanese pop-culture which is full of crossdressing males in anime, pop music & fashion. This discovery made me feel for the first time that I wasn't a weirdo. Something clicked, everything made sense.
Since then, my crossdressing has gone from the simple trying-stuff-on in my room...to finding I have a massive love for 19th century and Edwardian ladies' dresses & hairstyles.
I feel a mysterious connection for the aesthetics & a desire deep down to look like a lady from this era. I feel a hidden strength and confidence, it all feels so right & natural. I do not have answers as to why this is though.
I'm still hidesously confused inside, worried and whatnot, but I've discovered and developed so many positive aspects since diving in to this - I've started sewing, learning about dress making & I've discovered a wonderful Vcitorian inspired Japanese street-fashion. I've made many new friends through this fashion & I'm now filming this fashion & its followers in order to make programmes about it!
A thing that amuses me though is that perhaps I feel more like I'm suited to a different century than to a different gender! Tis a mystery. Does anyone else feel just as passionate about a particular era as they do to aspiring to be feminine?
Thanks for reading!
Best regards,
Matilda.