Who else is bi when their dressed. I need to know I'm
Not alone.
Who else is bi when their dressed. I need to know I'm
Not alone.
Keep your hands off my freedom and on my
I don't mean to be a pest but if your Bi when dressed, doesn't that just mean your Bi in general?
I didn't think sexuality was something that could be switched on and off at will.
I may not be perfect, but parts of me are pretty awesome!
Complete Geek and Girl gamer.
I agree with Stitch - there is no such thing as 'situational heterosexuality', just situational honesty.
Kathi
Agree entirely. I mean, does one then stop being bi if they get nekkid? That could be awkward!Originally Posted by Kathi Lake
Ahhh. No.... Nothing changes when I change clothes except my looks.
I used to think so. Not so much anymore. I'd say it's just that once you've broken through the taboo barrier you can find what you truly like and don't like.
The only time I change is in my dreams!
If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:
In the very simplest terms, if you are attracted to both sexes sexually, then you're Bi, the clothes you wear have nothing to do with it...
If you are turned on by a CD, and part of that attraction is knowing that they ARE a CD (i.e. a male person with male parts underneath)... you're at least bi-curious or probably bi. Which is fine.
Being married, closeted, repressed, father roles, societal pressure, leadership roles at work, zillions of other factors can exert enormous subconscious pressure and guilt. But the fact is, if playing with gender in the bedroom is what it takes to get your motor running with another guy or CD, I say go for it. We like what we like.
Last edited by ElusiveGirl; 10-26-2011 at 02:15 PM.
If you are attracted to both sexes, then you are Bi-sexual. It doesn’t matter a damn if you are wearing high heels and a formal evening gown or a jockstrap.
OK perhaps some clarification is in order...
When presenting as a man, is the OP attracted to other men, men presenting as female (CD's), and/or women?
When presenting as female, does the OP's attractions to these groups shift in any way? If so, in what direction?
I have heard "straight both ways" as an orientation. As in only attracted to women when presenting as male, and only attracted to men when presenting as female. It isn't quite the same as bisexual, because it excludes man+man and woman+woman same-sex scenarios. Even if it is only gender play.
Confused yet? LOL
Someone asked if two CD's together would be gay or lesbian. I'd say half of each. Others might vote gay if they are focusing upon biology. Still others might vote lesbian if feminine sexual identity was the main issue.
We need better labels.
Last edited by ElusiveGirl; 10-27-2011 at 12:10 AM.
Wait a minute------
We know that SOME here change clothes and change their gender at the SAME TIME!
Whose to say others here can't change their sexual orientation when they change clothes?
I don't understand it and doesn't work for me. But then, I don't understand anyone eating at McDonalds either!.gif "Big Roll Eyes")
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Do not be surprised, Brenda, by the forcefulness of these answers to your query. For many members, you are asking them to face threats that they do not want to admit exist, to be at risk and vulnerable with nowhere to take refuge.
We all need, or at least want very much, to have some immutable core of our being. It is the "real" us, the person we are when we are alone in the dark with our thoughts. But there is a problem with immutability. We grow older and our dreams change, we fall in and out of love, we find our needs adjusted by advertising, our politics and religion evolving with experience. And we, who think of even gender as fluid, have even less firm ground upon which to stand.
I think this is the reason you have so many categorical statements expressed with such certainty on this forum. If "once a crossdresser, always a crossdresser," well then at least that can be added to our core being. But this makes it really frightening not to understand our gender, because we don't understand something about our core. There are usually two responses: the soul searching, agonized "why do I do this" threads, and the "don't worry, just enjoy" responses.
We learn to live with the contradictions. Some talk about the male and female "sides" within, or that they occasionally "express" a feminine personality. We go so far as to give each side a name. But which one is the "real" us? Our core being is suddenly a little less knowable.
So what is left to add to our core being, but our sexuality. We don't know whether we are "really" Joe or Jane, or both, but we cling to the belief that at least our sexuality is a constant in our life. If the sexuality of Joe and Jane is different from each other, then what is left of our core being? Many have responded that they are the same person, dressed or not. But something changes, or they would not bother to dress. Is it impossible to believe that some of those changes could involve sexuality?
Liz
I agree with the others, bi is bi. Dressed, you libido is heightened which highlights your true bi nature.
Kitty
Perhaps when you are dressed you than feel comfortable giving yourself permission to do something that you feel is wrong when you are not dressed combined with the feeling of wanting to be " taken" by a strong male as a woman. Sex is as much psychological as it is physical and there is nothing as complex as the human mind, no two are ever exactly alike but all are similar. The only way to self discovery is to taste life while watching to see if you are harming not healing your person. Challenging, scary as hell but very interesting, you will make plenty of mistakes but you will not be bored thats for sure. If you do not use life to escape from yourself but use it to discover yourself you will reach your destination.
when im dressed and with a guy , if that makes me gay im ok with that. If im dressed and with another cd, does that make me a lez ?
Questions like this used to really bother me until I realized for me "Skin is Skin"
I am who I am no matter what.
I'll go out on a limb here and I know there is at least one philosopher on this board so it might take an interesting turn.
An actor playing a role takes on the character's persona and characteristics. Method actors are known for immersing themselves in their characters to the point they have been known to remain in character even when the cameras are not running or they are not on stage. The point is that actors, in taking on a role, often absorb characteristics of the character they are portraying, sometimes, very convincingly.
In the case of the OP, is it possible that, in dressing as a woman, he takes on the characteristics of that particular woman who, I think we can all agree, is inside him. Is it possible that he, in his drab self, loves chicken wings and beer. But, when he is dressed, he prefers cosmopolitans and tapas. So, would it be a stretch to say that the woman inside him is bisexual but he is not?
Again, I think that by virtue of us being who we are (crossdressers), we do take on a role when we dress. Clothes, we know (by societal and own reactions) are more than just the fabric cut, sewn, and configured in certain ways. Clothes are an identity. We go to job interviews dressed one way and to a BBQ dressed in another way because they put forth an identity. Some may say they are identities.
By the way, in drab mode, I am very conservative; when I dress, it is as s provocative and borderline ****ty woman.
Are there flaws in this logic?
Last edited by Marie-Elise; 10-26-2011 at 03:24 PM. Reason: Added a note about myself.
Sounds reasonable to me!
To the Op and Yang: "Not so's you'd notice it!" Sounds reasonable to me, besides, I really like that last paragraph, Yang! Rave on, sweetheart!
You are what you are and no amount of clothing will make you bi. Clothing doesn't make you bi...and those who think is does are in denial.
Sandra
Administrator
I always used to rib you about your legs can't anymore. R.I.P Sexy Legs
R.I.P Rianna
Ya gotta agree with the crowd on this one. Bi is bi regardless
I totally disagree with the crowd...you can be whatever you want...you may not necessarily be "bi when dressed" though...it may be just a fantasy fullfillment, or wanting to conform to the role...either way, only YOU can tell YOU what you are!
I enjoy the nwomans role with a man, but cannot say I am attracted to a man, plus I have no interest in being with a man unless I am dressed
either you are "BI" or you aren't, you sexual orientation does not change by the clothes you wear. I mean really think about it!! That is just none sense to think a peice of clothing would change your sexual prefernce, Face the facts.
With all due respect, I completely disagree.
As one who did martial arts for years and competed in tournaments, I can say that my aggressiveness increased once I got into uniform and stepped into the ring. As a former soldier, I can say my uniform gave me a feeling of invincibility I did not feel in civilian clothes. Even now, when I dress, I am more careful about my eating and more considerate toward my wife.
Does dressing change my sexual preference? Not exactly. I son't fancy men in any way, but I do find I fantasize about my wife walking up behind me and handling me as I do her when I am in drab mode. I would also be open to her being the man with the help of a toy, if you get my drift. This is something that I never fantasize about with me in drab.
Again, I think that it's different for everyone but I do not find a change in sexual preference due to clothing to be improbable, unlikely or impossible. I find it very much in the realm of possibility and can say I have experienced shifting preferences due to what I am wearing.
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