Aye.
Tis' a sore spot for a lot and especially confusing.
But yeah, the more "straight" you say you are the less straight you actually are.
I remember buying into that whole "raaarrrrghhh! REAL MEN DO (x)" until I realized it was just internalized homophobia, then I evened out and stopped pretending.
Feels nice not to fake masculinity, not that I'm overtly effeminate but I don't feel "forced" to put up a fake front either.
I suspect a lot of men are the same way, "manliness" just being a way to hide internalized homophobia.
Sometimes I wish I was 100% gay though, finding a partner would be a helluva lot easier than trying to explain CD and not wanting the male role in bed.
