well, first I'd like to say that this forum is really great! All of you rock and all of you look incredible. I've been dressing since I was 4years old. I would sneak my mother's sexy panties and wear them over my sleeper/pajamas. My parents would catch me and tease me about it, shaming me for doing it. I'd then hide my cross-dressing for private moments. I later got married, and would wear my wife's things when she was working and the kids w grandma. We later divorced and I don't think she ever knew.
2 marriages later, I'm married to a gorgeous woman, blonde with a Barbie-like body. She HATES to wear lingerie, but does have some nice panties that I like. When we met, I told her that I really like lingerie, and hinted around in various conversations about wearing heels, and understanding how having large breasts would make your back sore, etc. I have found that if my SO wears nice lingerie, I don't have that much of a need to wear it. She buys her bras and panties at VSecret, but they aren't frilly or lacy. My wife has more masculine qualities, and I have more feminine qualities, more in personality than physical appearance. That makes us very compatible.
Once, when I was caught looking at her VS catalog, she asked me why I was looking at the women in there. I replied, "To find something to buy you as a surprise." (I was really looking to see what I'd like to wear myself) When she asked me what I had in mind, I showed her some sexy garterbelts, stockings, etc, and she told me that they were uncomfortable, and if I wanted to see her in them, I'd have to wear them first. I said that was fine, I'd be happy to wear them, but she didn't take me seriously.
Some months later, I started walking around the house wearing her panties. She thought that was really sexy and said that since she didn't like tight-fitting clothes, it was good that I stretched them out for her. After a few months of that, she put her bra on me and I wore it all night while we watched tv, but hers aren't girlie enough for me really.
I had a small stash of clothes at home, panties, bras, stockings, garterbelts, slips half-slips and camis, and a pair of heels that I'd wear during the day when she was gone, but could only do it a few hours at a time, and had to change before she returned home. This went on for about 2 years.
This past September, it was my birthday and she got sick...bed-ridden sick. I had just cleaned out a rental property where I had my main collection of clothes, 30 bras, 50 half-slips, 20 full slips, 10 camis, nighties, etc. and had brought them home and stashed them. While she was sick, I thought it may be a good time to come out by wearing a garterbelt, lace top white stockings, white panties, a white lace bra, a short full-slip a nurses uniform (one of those sexy costume ones I had bought on sale) and some heels. I then brought her some soup while dressed as a nurse.
It surprised her to say the least, said that I looked cute, made me lift my skirt to check me out, etc...then asked where I got that stuff. I told her that I brought it over from the rental property where I had it for some years. She asked me what all I had, and I told her. She said that I could wear it as long as I didn't "Overwhelm her" with it by dressing every day.
I was excited and the next day dressed up in stockings, garterbelt, panties, bra, full slip and heels and it felt so great. I went to bed wearing a nice silky nightie that I longed to wear for some time. The next day, I wore my usual clothes. She asked me why I wasn't dressed up, and I told her that I didn't want to overwhelm her. She said it was fine as it didn't bother her and thought it was a little strange, but that it didn't bother her.
I started dressing up almost every day, and wearing nighties to bed, and sometimes even stockings as I love the way they feel. After all, she said she was ok with it. Here's where it gets difficult. My wife is also an alcoholic and a mean drunk. We've had countless arguments when she's been drinking, and I've spent countless nights either in my truck, in the car, at the hotel, at the motel or downstairs in the lobby or on the couch. Every time she gets smashed, she then tries to blame her drinking on me and the fact that I'm a transvestite and that I probably want to be with men. (well, I am bi-curious when dressed, but that's another issue)
This last time that she got smashed, I hadn't dressed up in some time around her. I work from home, and had worked until 2:30am and needed to be back at work @8am. I was in bed trying to sleep, and just got to sleep when she comes in and jumps on me, waking me up. She's trying to be loving, but when she's drunk, I'm not that interested in having sex w her. I told her to leave me alone and she wouldn't. I got up and went into the living room to sleep on the couch. She followed, got on her computer and blasted music. I went back into the bedroom. I just got back to sleep when she comes in and wakes me up again. I told her to stop and she kept right on bugging me. I threw her off me, got out of bed and chased her out of the room and locked the door. 2 hours later, I'm sleeping when she starts pounding on the door so loudly, that I'm afraid the neighbors would call the cops. I tell her that I'm not letting her in and to sleep on the couch like I've had to do countless times. She refuses, then goes into my office where I keep all my femme clothes. I hear her doing something, so I get out of bed open the door, and see her throwing all my clothes around the room calling me all sorts of nasty names. I go to stop her and she dials 911.
The police come and she starts telling them that I'm a cross-dresser and that I probably want to be with men, am probably gay, and that I had her on the bed with my hands around her throat asking her to apologize and that was when I let her up. They hauled my ass off to jail charged with felony domestic violence with strangulation. There I was strip searched, etc...had to spend the night, yada, yada. I never touched her neck, but I had grabbed her by the chin and told her to leave me the f*** alone as I need to sleep.
When she's sober she's accepting but when she's drinking she's not. The other night, she asked me why I wasn't wearing a nighty to bed. I told her cause it bothers her. Then she says that if it makes me feel better I should do it. If I'm really stressed, dressing during the day and wearing a peignoir or nighty to bed really helps relieve my stress. Thank God she's finally working after several years, so now I can at least get dressed up during the day and change when she phones to say she's coming home. The few times that we had sex while was dressed in lingerie was extremely hot, but she'll throw it in my face when she drinks. I obviously cannot be myself around her, and I'm searching for other CDs in my area to meet with. Sorry for the long post, but I needed to vent..
