Short answer is No
Asking me today I would say no and even in my passing I might be dressed
The only thing that I can see changing that would be transition
Short answer is No
Asking me today I would say no and even in my passing I might be dressed
The only thing that I can see changing that would be transition
I am one of us that believes there are some that can stop. Do I think I am one of them? I don't care at this point. I am enjoying this far too much to think about stopping. It is obvious from those that have tried that the majority cannot stop because it is such a part of them. But each and every one of us is here for different reasons and different feelings. So there most certainly is those among us that can stop if they wish.
Why stop? After all, women wear pants all the time. I simply regard skirts, dresses, pantyhose, and heels as part of my regular wardrobe along with my male clothes. All my femme clothes are in plain view and I don't hide that I wear them.
I HATE the term crossdressing - I like to think of my femme clothes as an expanded selection.
Johanna
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: he, his, him
I think that if we could quit we would have long ago - or probably never started. I began to dress openly at the age of 5. I went through many times of fighting against this - but like an artist that can never quench the urge to draw, I cannot stop the need to express what I feel inside. It is who I am. Once I came to realize that and accept who I am, I became a calmer, happier person. Fortunately I have a spouse that accepts me and I found a counsellor to help me sort things out.
Victoria
I think that it would be sad and repressive (and probably unhealthy) if I ever stopped dressing. It's fun. It feels great. I don't think that it is wrong. I don't feel guilty about it anymore... I like being able to express myself in this different and interesting way.
I honestly don't think one can stop indefinitely. It is a core part of who we are and this will never change.
Whenever I have tried in the past I have become deeply unhappy, irritable and a negative person (beyond my normal cynicism that is). In time it blots out my positive traits and accentuates the negative.
Crossdressing makes me happy. It makes me feel complete, balanced and whole as a person. It allows me to express myself completely - even if only within my own home. The fact that I keep Crossdressing in the closet is not an issue for me because I have finally achieved a balance which I am pleased with.
Crossdressing has made me a better person in every layer of my life and I would not change that for anything, even if it would make life so much easier.
I believe that everything happens for a reason and that only in time we learn and understand that reason.
I only wish I had put more energy into learning to accept myself sooner, I could have saved myself a lot of pain, guilt and frustration. Discovering this website has helped me immensely, sharing experience and learning from the users here has been invaluable to me and instrumental in being able to finally begin to accept myself for who I am.
From my own experience I believe Crossdressing is a fundamental part of who we are. We may have periods of less or inactivity but it is always there. The degree varies from one person to another but it is always present.
Just my 2p.
“A truth that's told with bad intent
Beats all the lies you can invent.”
― William Blake, Auguries of Innocence
I'm in the can't quit category. I finally accepted it after years of denying it and never feeling right. I could never feel happy, I never knew why. The emotional component of it is the big key for me. It puts my brain back in the proper balance if that makes sense to you. The change is glaring to my wife and a big reason why she encourages it.
No, tried many times over the years,but realised i cant, i enjoy it too much and wouldnt want to now
No, I don't think I will ever stop again at this point. As time is going on I am learning that this is who I am and I need this outlet to make me happy. I am at a point where I feel like stopping would just make my life miserable. So for me the best option is to continue dressing and be happy.
~~Melissa~~
Tried a lot of times over the last 22 years. Failed each time. Something always draws me back.
Each of us has our own reason for cross dressing and unless you are able to resolve that reason completely you will most likely never be able to give up. You may cut down or stop for a while but something will draw you back. I understand my own reasons for what I do and now understand I can never stop unless society has a massive change in attitude to what men can wear without trying looking female - which is short is not going to happen.
Getting a girlfriend will not change a thing for you. A lot of us are married or in serious relationships and still do it (with or without directly telling our partners).
So will I stop? No. Crossdressing is not like a drug or a substance you can give up - unless you can fully and completely address the thing that made you start in the first place...
That does make sense. It took me a while to work out that being a Gemini the two sides to my personality are distinctly male and female. Putting them in balance makes me whole but both sides must be expressed - ideally at the same time. Took me 18 months to work this out and a lot of emotional pain and learning. But worth it? Good god yes. I understand who I am and what I want now. 4 years ago I had no idea at all...Originally Posted by Marleena
To tell the truth I've only tried it once myself, but there are days when I want to do it again so badily. Problem is I don't have any place by myself to do it again, last time i had to want till my friends parents left. Some day I will, hopifully by then I'll also have the forms i want to buy along with the other things, but i gotta lose my extra weight first and formost
Stop? No I will never stop. This is a part of me I have accepted and love it.
Amanda
I will quit the day after I die.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
I seriously doubt it. Right now, I have no desire to quit dressing...in fact quite the opposite. But, I'm very poor at predicting the future. What I think and what actually happens are likely to be two very different things.
The question was asked two different ways:
1) do you think you'll ever stop?
2) do you think you'll ever quit?
Some may see this as a distinction without a difference, but I see a difference. I see quitting as denying the urge, and stopping as the urge subsiding until it is no longer compelling to dress. How can this happen? It probably won't for cd's with a strong feminine identity, but for those cd's who are sexually aroused by crossdressing, if the sexual drive (in general) subsides as the body and mind age, the reason to dress may not be there any longer, and it stops. I realize that an individual cd's drive to dress may be their unique mix of identity and pleasure, and the drive may never go away for some, even as the pleasure element subsides. Also, it's not just sexual pleasure; some cd's get tactile or emotional pleasure from crossdressing. For those whose drive is highly sexual, I can see a time when the drive to dress isn't there any longer.
I can start to feel (and see) the effects of aging, but so far the urge to dress hasn't gone away. Yippee.
As Mark Twain might have said....its easy to quit Cding. I've done it hundreds of times!
I told myself for years that this would be the last time; so much guilt and confusion. Then when I was almost 30, that distant drumbeat that had marched by once in a while became cacophonous, and I had to deal with it. I read everything I could find and concluded that I might be TS with many, many layers of repression. That began a decade of experimentation, including nearly eight years full-time. Now it was many, many layers of real life that compromised who/what I was. It was a purge of sorts because I reduced my wardrobe to a minimum. Moved out of state, skied a lot, pursued an old long-shot relationship, and eventually felt hollow again.
I kicked the closet open again for good, went out more than I ever used to, acquired more and nicer clothes than I had before, and eventually stumbled across The One for me at a CD get-together. Her marriage (to a CD) had gone empty long before that, but she had no problem with CD per se (oh happy day!). We married two years later, and we had our eighth anniversary this year.
I had been alone for a quarter-century after a five-year, childless marriage in my early 20s. Now a part of my life is being a grandpa to a three-year-old (now THAT's a reality check). The road of life sure has lots of interesting curves...
There are times when she shoots up a "balance, please" flare, but not often, and never with an ultimatum. Life goes on.
So, to finally answer the question of the thread, no. I don't want to, I don't have to, so I won't. I pay attention to not letting it take over completely, but it has a very prominent place in my life. This is who I am, for better or worse; there is serenity in that acceptance and deep meaning in the practice of this thing we do.
Last edited by Acastina; 12-27-2011 at 02:10 PM.
I cannot ever she me giving living as a woman. Arlene IS the real me.
Fulfilling a Lifetime Dream of Living as a Woman in My Adult Years.Ten Years Living 24/7 as a Mature Lady
My Love of Cat's Eye Frames, Bangles, Red Lipstick, Nails, & Cheeks, Comes From My Mother - An Irish Beauty
I'm Always Rainbow Proud
As for me, it's simply not possible. This is my DNA, who i am, have been and will be, and is immutable. If i were to stop dressing, the impulse would still remain - it cannot be willed away, it is not a matter of choice. Yes, the strength of the impulse may ebb at times but it always returns. Remember that if you ever impulsively consider purging!!!
Now that I'm out to the world, the only time I'll stop is when they're shoveling dirt on top of me.
Luv andJill
Straight, into Fantasy Land
Personally I've had active and passive phases, and expect that will continue for the rest of my life. I know from my experience that you don't "stop", sometimes the desire fades a bit, sometimes it flares up
I'm sorry to say I think the questions are not directed at the issue. Crossdressing is a manifestation of the feminine creature within us. That feminine creature is not going away, ever.
How we deal with her is the issue.
tina
I have tried to stop many times, what usually happens is I throw/give away good clothes. I did it when my wife and I started dating, I did it later when we moved, I did it again when my son was born. I think all that happens when I try to quit is I waste money. When I get really stressed I want to dress nothing I can do about that.
True for some, but not all.
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