Collection issues

[EllieBellie]

Firstly, let me explain the situation. I'm 20 and live with my mum and two smaller sisters, and have a quite small room. I enjoy crossdressing, but so far my collection of female clothing is in a shoebox, hidden at the bottom of my wardrobe. The problem is that I have very few chances to dress up, apart from when i'm alone in my bedroom, and I've struggled with gathering bits I want aswell, I'm aftraid to order things off the internet incase when it arrives someone else in the house may start to wonder, as at the moment it's only a personal thing really. I haven't got a wig, any breasts, makeup or shoes, and apart from the net, I don't know really where I can find the wig or boobs.

I'm kinda determined to go through with this and I feel like I've hit a wall here, thought it would be good to ask here for some advice, if you can, Thanks!

Ellie

[RileyEvans]

Hi Ellie, I'm kinda in the same situation apart from having siblings. The way I have hidden my Internet buying is buy getting a po box and have all my personal stuff delivered to it.

Riley

[nvlady]

You're twenty years old. Have patience, the wall will crumble in a few more years. You will be out on your own.

[Princess29]

yeah ellie, keep calm. You have a long time to explore this

[Karren H]

Shop locally... Thrift stores or charity shops. I bought my first wig in one. That way you don't have any delivery issues. Or make a local tg friend who can receive parcels.

[Anna Abwaerts]

They will find it, if they havent already, sooner or later, accept it. Then they either confront you or do nothing but say to themselves "oh, I knew all along". If they confront you, play it cool- Oh, its mine. Yeah, I need it.
Shopping locally is your best option for now.

[CindyT]

Hang in there buddy! The PO box would be a good thing, if you can't swing it you should travel out of town once in a while to buy stuff and dress up. That's what I used to do. Of course I've always lived in a small town where everybody knows everybody so I could not shop there... if you are in a larger town you may be able to shop there and just keep hiding the stuff.

[Dana7]

Shop locally... Thrift stores or charity shops. I bought my first wig in one. That way you don't have any delivery issues. Or make a local tg friend who can receive parcels.

Karren is right about thrift stores, and I would also add yard sales. If you have the nerve to buy there, you can find some great values and make your funds go further. The trick is finding things that fit, and it helps to know your own sizes for different garments. Be prepared for snickering though, sometimes sales clerks can be immature or judgmental. It is part of the price we pay to feel fem.

[eluuzion]

I would just consider that shoe box to be a good training exercise for later in life. When you get married, that is about the amount of space your SO will give you to store all of your clothes in. In my experience, women tend to take over 98% of the storage space in a bedroom.

One of the basic rules in life is that the person paying the bills gets to make the "rules".

One option is to ask everyone to move out and let you live in the house by yourself. Good luck with that option,

A better option is to get your own apartment. No wait...get a job first...then get an apartment.

[jillleanne]

If you want used items due to budget restraints, second hand stores and rummage sales as mentioned above are ok. It also sounds like you might want a friend in all this. I do not know what country you live in, but there are many places that have support groups that would love to have you as a friend and generally speaking, all these groups( google TRI-ESS) are very careful about your privacy so not to worry about anyone finding out about you. Many have a location where you can change clothing on site. As stated, you are probably about ready to flee the nest in the near future and that will provide you with some space and privacy in which to express your gender self. As a hint as to where you may be headed, my shoe box in my bathroom is just big enough to only hold my collection of lip sticks now. I suspect you will need a couple more boxes in the near future, followed by a few suitcases, followed by a few walk-in closets, maybe.

[Kelli Ca]

Hi I think I don't know if this is an option but maybe mum and sis would be understanding, if told. If not the po box worked for me there are lots of sites that send in dis@reet packaging. I remember when my collection was small so I can really identify just hang in there you have youth on you're side love n luck

[DonnaT]

When I was little and living with my parents, I had 4 brothers and shared one of two bedrooms, yet I managed to hide several dresses and some lingerie, and find time to dress.

Where there's a will there's a way.

How much spare room do you have in your bedroom? Will a footlocker fit? How about a lockable case you can slide under the bed? Even some of the plastic storage boxes/bins/cases can be made lockable with a couple of drilled holes and a lock or two.

Need to get away, try a small cheap motel. Find a support group near you.

[Babeba]

Wigs you can find in person fairly easily (good wigs may be another story??)

As for forms - try making your own for now (birdseed, old pantyhose?) and consider the real thing as a gift for yourself to work towards getting as a housewarming present for when you can afford to move out on your own! (it's nice to have motivation, isn't it?)

[EllieBellie]

Thanks for the advice

I live in England and to be honest I have no idea where I'd start looking for a friend I can talk to in person about this, as for space in my room there's a few places to hide bits but I dunno where to hide larger, less easy things like corsets. Money atm isn't really an issue, got a pretty decent job and I could buy the missing parts quite easily, it's just the buying/hiding problems xD but yeah, I guess there's no immediate rush, however much I'd love to get properly started

[carnut62]

Could you get a storage unit somewhere? A PO box helps a lot too. I store stuff in my attic now. How old are your sisters, maybe you could hide it in their room If you are 20 maybe you could rent a room somewhere else. I often wondered what I would have been like back in my early 20s if I felt as comfortable with myself as I do now. I might have let all my laundry get dirty and ask my sister to borrow something, who knows. Where there is a will there is a way.

[DonnaT]

There are a good number of support groups, and meet-ups in the UK.

[Carla Stevens]

Hi Ellie. Welcome to the forum from another UK member.
I still live with my father & this makes it awkward for me.
I have a couple of suggestions that I use for delivery of my stuff.
First I use a company called MyByBox. Website HERE. Follow the details on the website to create an account & stuff you order online can be delivered to this company who then deliver it to a 'collection box' where you pick up the delivery. They send you a text to tell you when the delivery has arrived at your chosen box & give you a unique pin number to open the box. There is a fee for each delivery (£2.00).
Secondly, some online stores use a delivery service called Collect+. With this service your goods are delivered to a shop, petrol station etc that is part of the Collect+ network. Website HERE. Again you will get a text telling you when the delivery has arrived.
Now I've become more comfortable with shopping in person in stores, but I still go 'out of town', so as not to bump into anyone I know.

I can't really suggest a good way of hiding your stash, especially as your collection gets larger. Mothers have a habit of finding stuff you don't want them to. Years ago (when I was still a teenager) when my mother was still alive I got "I was just tidying your room & moved the bed to clean under it & found this". Yes it was my porn collection.
I'm not too bad now as my father stays out of my room & I do all the cleaning in my room, so I've got most of my stuff stored in plastic storage boxes with lids, under the bed. Although I still don't get much time to dress.

As others have mentioned, there are some good support groups in the UK & joining one may help.
I'm lucky in finding a friendly community within a CDing shop in Bolton called Dee Selecta.

[Cassy]

I to have only a small amount of clothes and i want more. I usually shop online and have it shipped to where i work. It has my name on the package and no one suspects anything. I bought wigs and lots of clothes from vs.

[jillleanne]

Thanks for the advice

I live in England and to be honest I have no idea where I'd start looking for a friend I can talk to in person about this, as for space in my room there's a few places to hide bits but I dunno where to hide larger, less easy things like corsets. Money atm isn't really an issue, got a pretty decent job and I could buy the missing parts quite easily, it's just the buying/hiding problems xD but yeah, I guess there's no immediate rush, however much I'd love to get properly started

I have read where many people will buy those plastic/rubber tubs with lids and rent a storage locker by the month to keep their things. Then it just a matter of finding a place to change or do it in the locker I suppose.

[Brown Eyed Girl]

Growing up at your age I found a false ceiling in my closet and could put some of my things up there, but like you, had limited space while sharing a room with my two brothers. Keep thinking of ideas!

[carnut62]

Growing up at your age I found a false ceiling in my closet and could put some of my things up there, but like you, had limited space while sharing a room with my two brothers. Keep thinking of ideas!

If you do this make sure there isn't a water heater or air conditioner up there first

[elliemoss]

Hi Ellie, it can be really frustrating living at home but to be honest as long as you live there you wont ever get much time to dress up. You could always pay for a motel or hotel room if you are earning any money, say your staying at a friends house and spend the night dressing. Is there an attic in your house, you could put a box up there? You could google local stores that sell everything your looking for, believe me they'll be only too happy to see you in their stores. I always find shopping in stores more fun than ordering off the net, it can be nerve wracking but lots of fun and you can always say what youre buying is for your gfriend...

[Maria 60]

I know the feeling about wanting to dress and wanting to dress now, not tomorrow or not knowing when. But i found we must remain calm or we are going to go crazy. Don't worry time will come.