I too have performed #1 and #2. #3 is where it gets a little tricky for me...how do you tell your wife you think you might be a woman in a man's body? Not only that, how do you tell her you might be attracted to men as well? My therepist wants me to tell my wife, but I don't even know how or where to begin this conversation. I've jokingly told my wife several times that I'm a lesbian, maybe it was slipping out as a joke but was a deep truth that I was unable to comprehend when I said it to her.
shy girl,
my SO has her head in the sand..............she is stubborn and doesn't realize or care about my feelings. i have recommended this forum to her but she refuses to sign in. i'm about ready to pitch it. i'm too old to change but to young not too.
geri danielle
Shy Girl, That's all I was saying, is to tell her everything from the standpoint of how you feel now, and how you have ever felt. If she ask's questions that you do not know the answers to, you tell her that you do not know. You just need to give her ALL of your feelings, answer all questions that you can, tell her even of your confusions, that you're not sure how far you want to go with this. You're seeing a therapist and that's a real good thing. You should take your therapist's advice above all else on here. And I hope your therapist does advise you to tell your wife everything. It's only fair that your wife can deal know all that there is in your cd'ing. Like I said before, don't ever give tid-bits, or half truths or withhold anything. A wife is entitled to be given full disclosure, so that she can make decisions with, for, and about the whole you. If you're not sure of how to tell her everything , maybe she needs to go with you to the therapist, and he or she can help you convey your feelings that you feel confused about.Originally Posted by Shy Girl
I did #1 and I did #2 and #3 has been offered up this weekend but she is not ready to talk about it yet. #4 I just don't know all the answers yet I just started to see a therapist. My wife wants to talk about the things I know and not the things I might know that I want to do.
If she isn't ready to talk about it right now as you stated, then tell her that I'm here for you anytime day or night my love, should you ever need or want to talk about it.
L&R...............Tara
I do not share my feelings with my wife.
She made it clear she was not interested in knowing about this part of me and I have no desire to push the issue.
I am disappointed, but not much I can do about it now.
Quit trying years ago. It's not worth the silences that follow.
I believe I was a lesbian in a previous lifetime.
Different situations in so many different marriages. It's all good for those of you that have tried and your wife isn't interested. For at least you have given all.
L&R.............................................Ta ra
My wife is fully aware and supportive of my CDing. I hide almost every part of my being from her. She asked when I told her that I was a CDer if I thought that I would ever want to transition. I told her honestly that I of course would never consider transitioning. In reality. If I had a body to transition I would in an instant. I have only lied to my wife on one point, if My body did not have the issues that it does I would pursue transition without a second thought. I assume your want to keep quiet are for some reason I have to say if you don't have to hide something from your SO particularly an accetpting SO don't hide it.My wife is very supportive, but she does not know all of my feeling that I hide deep down. All she knows is that I like to dressup like a woman and that it makes me feel good. Since I've been coming here I have started to open up a little more I've talked about going out and she does not know how she feels about it. She does not know that I wish I was a woman sometimes not always she does'nt know the half of it. I'm afraid to tell her to much, but I told her that I'm nervous about my therapy becouse I don't know how my feelings are going to take shape. I'm slowly trying toget her to know that there is more to my feelings. So how much of your desires does your SO know?
Love like you've never been hurt,
work like you don't need the money,
and dance as if no one is watching.
Delila
I have a question: are you happy in your life? Do you have moments when you enjoy being a man and a husband to your wife?
Reine
This is probably the best thing I have read since I joined here. Thank you for all of the insight you have given me. I know I should see a therapist. If not for the CDing, for all of the other things that I have happen to me as a child. I have often wondered where I fit into this wide range of being. I know I love my wife and I want to be with her forever but I would like answers to how in depth I want to go. Times I am conflicted and others I am sure of what I am doing. Again, Thank You from the bottom of my heart.
OT: Until recently I hid everything. Since I told my wife I am about 93 percent honest. That gives me 5 percent that I myself am unsure of and 2 percent for things like "does these pants make me look fat" < never gonna answer that one. lol.
Allison Kat
Live Life by Sharing Your Life..
Yes I am a princess. At least that's what they call me. lol
I did #3 and #4, so now my SO knows EVERYTHING because I held nothing back. When she asks me questions I tell her the truth with no omissions. Scary, but liberating. She's accepting and helpful, so things are looking very promising for us.
It's because of many members of this forum that I was able to tell her my truth.
Thank you all.
Last edited by moondog; 02-07-2012 at 12:29 PM. Reason: spelling
This is great new moondog. It does make you feel so much better doesn't it? For you to know that not only have you told your wife of your desires, but you told her everything and held nothing back. That's the only way to do it.
Love and Peace..........Tara
Posting Permissions
