How many of you are members of TG groups, and how has it helped you?

[Karen Francis]

Support groups sure do come in all shapes and sizes. The group I have the most experience with is the Lehigh Valley Renaisance, which meets in Allentown PA. Very helpful in taking the first steps when going public. I have attended other similar groups, usually learning something everytime. Very personal decision, but outside of the TG world, I attend "group" events associated with other hobbies, i.e. car shows etc. Seems to be the logical thing to do, share a portion of your life with others with similar interests...

[AllieSF]

I am a member of a few local San Francisco Bay Area meet up type groups, and also a member of the River City Gems Yahoo group. I attend some of their functions when I can. My primary purpose for joining any group has been to network and meet new friends who may live reasonably close to me, have a complimentary, as well as, similar personality, presentation, maturity and character. My results have been good and as RachelOKC says not all groups offer what one may be looking for. I do not go to the groups for support. My favorite local group after the Gems is the TG/GG Mutual Admiration Society. The organizer does a fantastic job of finding funky and eclectic bars and restaurants to meet up at. I always enjoy those outings.

[StaceyJane]

I went to two meetings of the Austin Tri-Ess group but decided I could do better on my own without paying dues.

[VickysBFF]

I am not a member of any group but for anyone interested or curious about groups and such I would recommend going out to any events as a sort of first step. I attended an evening specifically for the Transgender community at our local LGBT center a year ago and really enjoyed the event and the chance to meet and talk to other transgendered people.
I don't really have the interest in going to regular meetings but this type of one-time event was worth it.
Also, whenever your local Pride occurs (generally during the summer months) I highly recommend going as usually there are a couple of events/attractions for the CD/TG community and it provides a chance to meet and speak to others without going to a meeting or joining a group.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I am a member of several DC groups, but one of them is far superior to the others.

We go out a lot, in a large group, so I feel much more comfortable and safe while O&A in a group setting.

Plus, I got to meet a great group of girls in all different situations.

I've also met up with a Denver group while traveling there, and I met some members of a Houston group.

Unfortunately, my Houston trips ended just around the time I discovered the Houston group.

It's always more fun to be O&A in a group, IMHO.

[eluuzion]

Internet "forums", "groups" and "clubs":

"A place where a bunch of people get together and create their own personal "Disneyland", that they gradually begin to refer to as "reality".



I have not found anyone yet (on this planet) that "thinks like I do".
I feel groups create a valuable resource for many people that need or desire such things in their lives.

People typically join "groups" with an expectation of bonding with others who "think like I do". From my observations, the reality of being accepted within most groups requires a commitment to "think like they do". For me, those are two different objectives that by default, do not represent a creative or constructive opportunity when combined.

I get all of the support I need right now from my pantyhose...
I feel that "joining" any group is in some degree, taking a step away from curiosity and creativity.However I do participate in some (like this forum) to indulge my irresistible fascination with trying to understand the complexities of how people "think"


but that is just me...

[Sally24]

I've helped start several "social" groups in New England. Our main objective is to offer TG people a safe, public venue to het out of the closet. Our members are as varied as their names and ages. Most are TG but more and more we are having girls go full time. We seem to average 2a year actually getting surgury and transitioning. That was rare even just 5 years ago.

I think the theraputic effect of talking to others with "similar" issues can't be overstated.

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/sisters_of_boston/

[Debb]

Really never even considered joining the local TG group. Just don't think I need any support or help...

Karren -- you don't need help or support. That said, and I am not saying this to appeal to your vanity ... you have something to offer. If there's a social group you feel any slight interest in, honestly there are girls in that group who could use a positive role model such as yourself.

I speak as one of those girls -- I am in Minneapolis, so not specifically targeting you here. The group I participate in (mentioned earlier, CLCC) has offered me the benefit of seeing others, of getting to know others, of learning to accept .. myself. My eyes have truly been opened by attending meetings (when I can). It is a HUGE deal to be around others "like me", so to speak.

[Marleena]

Thanks for the replies so far, the group I'm in contact with as TG support/social group. The replies here make me think it is a good idea.

[Barbra P]

I belong to a local group made up of primarily crossdressers and a few transsexuals. In the spring of last year I was emerging from a purge that had lasted years when I found this site and I thought it was great that I could finally converse with other crossdressers. But I also had a desire to meet face-to-face with other crossdressers. I started looking on the Internet and immediately found TRI-ESS, but there wasn’t a local chapter but I did find a link to Neutral Corner (NC) through the local LGBT center.

I sent an Email requesting some information and it was answered with an invitation to attend the next monthly meeting. I sent another Email explaining that I had never been out in public dressed en femme and was extremely nervous about walking into a local restaurant so dressed. I was informed that it was customary for new members like myself to come in drab – not a rule carved in stone, just a recommendation.

My 28 year old daughter accompanied me to my first meeting. We ended up sitting next to the organization’s president, a transsexual (MTF) and she made both of us feel welcome and at ease. I was sufficiently impressed enough that I decided to join. It is customary at the start of the meetings to go around the tables and everyone introduces themselves and at my third meeting, the first meeting en femme for me, I heard a name that sounded vaguely familiar. At the time I couldn’t figure out why but later after leaving the meeting it dawned on me that I had seen the name here on the forum and we had even traded a few PM’s. Then I discovered another member of NC that was also a forum member, then another, and yet another. It has sort of become a custom that we arrive early and spend the better part of an hour in our own informal meeting; I find the impromptu meeting is usually the highlight of the evening.

Is the group meeting perfect, no, some months the main topic holds little interest for me, but I enjoy being with the other members. I also wish that there was some time set aside to socialize, but the pre-meeting sort of makes up for the lack of social time. All in all I enjoy the group.

[PretzelGirl]

The value of a group can vary among different people. For some, support is greatly needed. For others, it may be purely social and the ability to get out to meet and spend time with others is rewarding. But groups do need to be focused or anyone looking to join has no idea what they are about. So it may be true to an extent that groups have a distinct thought pattern, but it isn't a "we are better than you and you should think this way" type of thing. It is just so they have an identity. If a group is a free for all, it probably isn't going to last long.

I am a regular at my Tri-Ess and I also show up at two other groups in my area. Why three? Well, because they are there! But each gives me some different insight. Even more than that, I make friends at each and every group and enjoy myself at them.

[Princess Chantal]

The Princess is too modest: for years, 3/4 of Masquerade's social events were due to Chantal's initiative and planning!

Such dependency most often become a weakness to social groups

[NathalieX66]

I'm a member of New Jersey Support Group, which is all-inclusive, and also a sister orgnanization of Tri-Ess.

I've been out in public for two years, and I made the choice to decide between counselors and support groups. I wanted to hear about other peoples' experiences so I went the route of support groups.
The only problem with my experience with support groups, is I saw a couple of of "boo-hoo, my life sucks because I was born in the wrong body" from some attendees, and all I wanted to do was get out and be me. I don't feel like being depressed. I hope I don't sound too unkind here, but I feel like I graduated from that point.

I'm a full and loving supporter of those that suffer from GID, but hey, I want to go out and have fun!

[t-girlxsophie]

My local group,Crosslynx TG group was the first place I ever went out to,and where I was seen by anyone else,I was made welcome and quickly made friends,I have no doubt without it,I wouldn't be where I am today.It has always been a well respected group.It was out of action for last 18 months but It is back again,now a registered charity and we are hoping It will help all those ppl out there needing help or advice.Now I go mostly as a social event I know I missed it

Sophie

[joan47]

I belong to a group of ladies in the Tidewater area of Virginia, Rau Tau, formerly with Tri Ess but broke off many years ago, there are about 30 members currently, we meet once a week at hotel, nice room, very understanding hotel staff, and changing room. We have cd's and wifes from Richmond, Norfolk, Wiliamsburg area. Good group of ladies...

[divamissz]

A support group helped me get out of the house, learn about the community, and meet people who became friends. I also learned that for some people, a support group is a nice, safe bubble that is as much of a closet as staying home can be. When I started, it was a godsend, but eventually I did outgrow it. I remained a member more to support their work than because I needed it.

When I moved to Dallas, I joined a local support group so I could meet people and learn about the city. But it was not that long before I felt like I'd outgrown its usefulness, too. What I needed was a more social group-and found that through a local Meetup.

Both groups folded, eventually. The New Orleans one had been losing members for some time; post-Katrina, it collapsed. The Dallas group suffered from a lack of interest and embezzlement and died on its own.

I think support groups are good things if you need peers to guide you, and give you the confidence you need to progress. And it's a place to help others who were in your position not that long ago...

[Presh GG]

My Husband and I belong to a social TG group, I think it's quite differant as there are 8- 10 single GGs who are also members besides the wives that attend.Last count was just over 100. It's mostly a monthly meeting and a weekly get together for dinner , a movie , bowling or maybe a train trip to Portland or Vancouver BC.
I've met alot of nice people there.

Presh

[Marleena]

Thanks so much for all the replies.

Once the weather gets better I intend to check one out (support/social) group out of town. The city I'm in is probably one of the most intolerant TG cities in Canada.

[whowhatwhen]

Really?!
Unless I'm assuming wrong and you're elsewhere, I thought Toronto was supposed to be very TG friendly.

<---- Is clueless :P