OUT or NOT ?

[STACY B]

Well here is my question ,, There are alot of people on here that say alot of stuff about being out an not in the closet an thats cool and I dont meen EVERYBODY so yall dont get your feathers ruffled ! Just certain ones ,, But if you wear womans clothes out in public an you CLAIM that you do all this stuff ,, Why dont these folks have a picture up or where they live ? An come on none of that job crap , If ya look like a girl on here an work in man mode how in the hell are going to know ? An what the hell are they doing on a CROSSDRESSER site anyway ??

[JessHaust]

No feathers ruffeled here. I do indeed go out, sometimes several times a week, I also have my picture posted and if you look at my profile, there is a pic of me shopping, I really like that picture! Not everyone is yet that comfortable yet. Many are really just getting their toes wet, many haven't even left the house. Give them time to build up their confidence, it will come.

[goodnhose]

Sorry, can't help with this one, still trying to find my way out of the closet.

[Bree-asaurus]

umm... why does it matter? lol...

[AllieSF]

Being in or out of the closet, I assume that you mean staying at home versus going out in the real world. Based on that I am very much out of that closet. I go out once or twice a week to see plays, the ballet, dinner, wine, drinks, museums and to meet friends. I have an indication of where I live under my avatar and only post my pics when I feel like it and only for now in other member's threads. I have posted several. Why don't I post more? Because I don't want to. I am happy with the few that I posted and will probably post more in the future. My avatar is a pic on my shadow when I was playing tennis with another member here. Most of my pics have been in her threads. I do not feel the need to constantly validate who I am, nor to brag all the time about my outings by posting pics of me. I am in the closet when it comes to letting people I know in male mode know about this side of my life. So, I also practice moderation in posting pics in a public forum that may end up anywhere. I am retired so I do not worry about work. People post and do not post for a lot of reasons. I accept them all and always thank those that share their pics here. Otherwise, it really is nothing for anyone to worry about.

[taís]

well, this is The Internets. proceed with caution.

and as we know this forum doesn't require any pictures to validate anyone's identity, which I think is thoughtful and nice. (the brazilian main CD forum does tag users that present personal pics as "real", as opposed to the "virtual" ones — which I think is very silly. however they're a "club", not a support forum, so I guess that's more in line with what they're seeking.)

umm... why does it matter? lol...

agreed and +1.

[Barbara Ella]

During my extremely short time as a cross dresser compared to a lot of you girls, i have found that my closet has many doors, and it is taking me a long time to open them all, and what do i find when I open one closet door....ANOTHER DAMN DOOR!!! And I am not sure if I have the key for the next one, and it is dark in this closet, and their are now too many shoes on the floor, dresses on the rack, skirts hanging, all preventing me from looking for the key as I look at the pretties that are now in front of me. Not sure how quickly I want to find that key, as i am having just so much fun in this particular closet.

Trust me, in just 6 months, I really feel that I am out of the closet, doing things i believed were totally impossible just a few short months ago. Everyone has their own particular closet they are in at any particular moment, some are just bigger, but the feelings of insecurity are always there no matter how comfortable the cross dresser is after their time (years?) in the particular closet.

There is always one more door no matter how big the present closet, the key is to recognize just what the door is for you, and finding the key. The joy is in never giving up the search.

Babes

[5150 Girl]

Well,, when one goes out, the goal is to blend in, and unless yuo're some kind of documentarian photographer, people just don't go arround with a camera, much less taking pics of themselvs...
However, here's one from on campus taken at a fundraiser for a campus organisation (GLASS)
Oh yea, and a bonus pic taken at an 80's party at a local (stright) bar owned by some freinds.
Satisfied?

[Phylis Nicole Schuyler]

Simple, really.

First - when going out, I believe the goal is too blend in as best as possible - not go about taking photos of yourself and drawing attention.

Second - CD/TG or not - I'd rather not have photos of myself, my home, or the places I frequent regularly online for everyone to see. That's just common sense in 2012.

And finally - I don't feel much need to prove myself to anyone. Believe me, or don't. Your call.

Amen to that. If you can't take me as I am, then why should I have to prove myself? I only have to prove myself to me and my God, who is probably laughing His/Her ass off looking at me crossdressed. I always said I provide the entertainment.

[linda allen]

Well here is my question ,, There are alot of people on here that say alot of stuff about being out an not in the closet an thats cool and I dont meen EVERYBODY so yall dont get your feathers ruffled ! Just certain ones ,, But if you wear womans clothes out in public an you CLAIM that you do all this stuff ,, Why dont these folks have a picture up or where they live ? An come on none of that job crap , If ya look like a girl on here an work in man mode how in the hell are going to know ? An what the hell are they doing on a CROSSDRESSER site anyway ??

Realize that once something gets on the Internet, you lose control of it and it never goes away. True, this is a crossdresser website, but nobody had a personal interview to join and there's no guarantee that a member won't accidentally or intentionally let a non-crossdresser see the forum and/or photos.

A person who wanted to could join, get access to the photos, and copy them for personal use or to other websites. There are just so many ways things could go wrong.

That said, I posted a couple photos of me wearing sunglasses, but I'm not going to post my "real" name or address. Why should I? What would I gain by this?

[HannahF6]

I agree with numerous posts here, why excatly does this matter? Am I out? Depends on the meaning of the phrase, yes, I am comfortable outside in public, but being "out of the closet" implies having told loved ones, such as my wife, and that I have not done. My avatar picture is rather clearly outside.

Hannah

[NicoleScott]

An what the hell are they doing on a CROSSDRESSER site anyway ??

Same question for you. You claim that you're not a crossdresser (profile, about me). So what are you doing here?

[Leanne2]

I don't have an avatar picture because I couldn't figure out how to do it. Some of us were born way before this computer generation. But I did figure out how to post my picture on my profile page. Just because I did it once doesn't mean that I could do it now. I don't have the time to figure these tech things out. Leanne P.S. I do love to go out in public dressed en fem.

[kimdl93]

I admit, I don't take a lot of pictures of myself. As I've explained before, I never really like the way I look in photos...so why torture myself, eh?

[Karren H]

Imho.... Everyone's in a closet of some fashion.... Some are just larger than others and extend outside of their home..... So coming out to someone takes you out of one and puts you in a larger one.. Like upgrading closets!

Personally the only reason I really take photos is cause I'm narcissistic and shallow and like it when people say I'm pretty! Lol.

[Beverley Sims]

My avatar shows me out by the east river. At 5 o'clock it was dark. I live in a small community and even presenting as a woman I could be recognised.
A lot of people on this forum recognise the site instantly. Same as the Grenwich meridian that was on previously.
We don't all have the same levels of confidence that you may have, I have done some amazing and silly things by my standard wandering around the country side.
The internet is forever, but I wish to enjoy the rest of my life meeting like people and gain confidence.
I am pleased for the younger attractive ones now as the flood gates are open a lot more.
When I was younger and attractive and passed well I enjoyed myself. If I posted one of my early pics, there are those trolling the net that would recognise me.
My features have not changed enough to hide behind makeup.There are a lot of light featured people here and they would be easily discovered if they were careless.
Good on you Stacy for posting your avatar and I hope you have an enjoyable stay.

[S. Lisa Smith]

Imho.... Everyone's in a closet of some fashion.... Some are just larger than others and extend outside of their home..... So coming out to someone takes you out of one and puts you in a larger one.. Like upgrading closets!

Personally the only reason I really take photos is cause I'm narcissistic and shallow and like it when people say I'm pretty! Lol.

I agree with Karren, except they don't say I'm pretty, they just say i look nice (which is good enough for me )

[kimdl93]

So coming out to someone takes you out of one and puts you in a larger one.. Like upgrading closets!

I like the idea of a closet upgrade! I could use one - mine's getting pretty cramped and my wife won't share any space in her's.

[Miranda-E]

Its safer to stand in front walmart and hand out pics to strangers than post pics online.

[whowhatwhen]

Still deeply in and repressed, and I have no pics because at this time I do not have the resources to do a full (superficial) transformation.
I like reading because it helps me learn more about myself in the process, perhaps in time you'll see something.

I'm weird in that I cannot just put on something and be happy, if I'm going to wear a dress there must be no man in the mirror.

[STACY B]

Dam near everybody that posted on this page has a picture ? I said I just wondered about the ones that have been here awhile an go out an do all kinds of girl stuff an shop an get there nails done and just do alot of different outings , I was just curious why that dont put a picture up so we can tell them how good they look an compare looks an tips . Never said anything about being in the closet I was just wanting to see why they chose to not tell where that were from an why we could not see them ? When you talk to someone on the street or at there house do you look away or talk to em though the door ? An how in the world are we going to meet our sissters if we dont know they live right around the corner, They might need something or we could start a local group . So dont yall get offended I was just asking a question . DAM !

[STACY B]

Same question for you. You claim that you're not a crossdresser (profile, about me). So what are you doing here?

THATS A JOKE ,,,, On my page !!! I try an be funny ,, It must not be working >>>>> ?

[Sharon B.]

I don't have a camera with a timer, don't like pictures of myself when drab attire probably wouldn't like none when I am in woman's attire either.
Apparently it only matters to a select few as to whether we go out as a woman or not.

[JaneAshland]

Dam near everybody that posted on this page has a picture ? I said I just wondered about the ones that have been here awhile an go out an do all kinds of girl stuff an shop an get there nails done and just do alot of different outings , I was just curious why that dont put a picture up so we can tell them how good they look an compare looks an tips . Never said anything about being in the closet I was just wanting to see why they chose to not tell where that were from an why we could not see them ? When you talk to someone on the street or at there house do you look away or talk to em though the door ? An how in the world are we going to meet our sissters if we dont know they live right around the corner, They might need something or we could start a local group . So dont yall get offended I was just asking a question . DAM !

Well, that sure clarifies your orig post!

For me, I am uncomfortable posting a picture. WHen I do go out, I go to cities that I do not live in. Just in fear of being discovered. Don't know that I will, or ever want to come out 100%, for me the pain and suffering that it will cause is not worth the gain. Right now I am happy just taking drives to other cities and going out.

[Julogden]

Realize that once something gets on the Internet, you lose control of it and it never goes away. True, this is a crossdresser website, but nobody had a personal interview to join and there's no guarantee that a member won't accidentally or intentionally let a non-crossdresser see the forum and/or photos.

A person who wanted to could join, get access to the photos, and copy them for personal use or to other websites. There are just so many ways things could go wrong.

That said, I posted a couple photos of me wearing sunglasses, but I'm not going to post my "real" name or address. Why should I? What would I gain by this?

And how often has this happened here? I've been here several years and haven't heard of anyone ever having anything like this happen. The odds of being in a car wreck are WAY higher than anything like that happening, yet we don't give it a second thought to jump in our car and do whatever, so why should we worry about something that's way less likely to happen?

Same question for you. You claim that you're not a crossdresser (profile, about me). So what are you doing here?

I think you're misunderstanding what Stacy is saying. She is a transgendered male, so she belongs here, not everyone here is a CD. And what she's saying is there's really no reason to think that anyone here has to fear that a non-crossdressing friend, co-worker or family member might stumble on this site, see a photo of someone they know and recognize them. Let's face it, your odds for winning the lottery are probably better than the odds of that happening.

Carol