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Thread: How/why did you stop purging?

  1. #1
    Makeup addict!
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    How/why did you stop purging?

    I've gone through it too multiple times. Purging is something many of us do and I was wondering why you did purge in the past and why or how you stopped. For me, I wanted to give up crossdressing recently because I have felt conflicted about dressing as a girl so I thought I had to give it up in order for these conflicting feelings to disappear. I really stuck to it for a few days but it was torturous for me because I have a lot of female friends and when I'd see them in their boots and their cute sweaters as well as all the dresses and heeled shoes I see in the mall, I couldn't take it. I didn't throw anything away because I guess I subconsciously knew it wouldn't last long and had to become Katie again and I did so. I guess my femme side has a lot of control over me as I have gone back to being Katie again. I still feel conflicted and will probably try to purge again in the future, but I love being her so much it probably won't last long

  2. #2
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    I stopped when I finally realized that I would come back to CDing, which happened several times. It was getting expensive replacing everything. To reach the place of self acceptance was also an important step also. I am what I am, no sense fighting it, it only makes you miserable fighting a losing battle. Life is a journey, so we might as well embrace it and enjoy the ride.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  3. #3
    Member Eva_nine's Avatar
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    i only purged once when i was very young. i was 15-16 and only had 2 outfits with no make up or shoes and a swim suit so it wasnt much. i did it because i thought my mom might find the stuff.

    now when i get that feeling that i dont want to dress i typically try to force myself to either work on my car or motorcycle so that my hands wont be girly or i grow a beard which i HATE. Much better than wasting money but it helps me slow down and remember that being girly is just a hobby and not something i can commit to full time. i have had a beard since the begining of february kinda as a punishment for going out twice in one week en femme back in january. i hate the beard but its much better than wasting a ton of $$ and having to start all over like i know i would.

  4. #4
    Silver Member Marcia Blue's Avatar
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    I stopped purging after coming out to my Wife. She asked after joining this site, "Have you ever purged?". I replied, "Yes". She said, "Do not do that again, you are only wasting money". Since then, I have not purged.

    Wise women, my Wife!
    Marcia (LOVES) Blue

  5. #5
    naughty nurse Billie Jean's Avatar
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    I lost a lot of pretty things I loved and it was getting too expensive. Billie Jean

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member Anna Lorree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marcia Blue View Post
    I stopped purging after coming out to my Wife. She asked after joining this site, "Have you ever purged?". I replied, "Yes". She said, "Do not do that again, you are only wasting money". Since then, I have not purged.

    Wise women, my Wife!
    I quit after telling my wife as well. After I told her about purging, she told me I was stupid for getting rid of so much stuff.

    Anna

  7. #7
    Junior Member Lisa-N's Avatar
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    Like most I have purged 2 or 3 times. After the first time my wife foundout. again after a separation from my wife (not due to dressing) Now that I have accepted that Tangi is an integral part of who I am and what makes me unique I won't do it again. Anyhow as others have said I lke my clothes and its way to expensive to keep replacing these things. My wife may not fully approve but she doesn't object. Out of sight out of mind.

  8. #8
    AKA Lexi sometimes_miss's Avatar
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    At some point, I realized that my crossdressing wasn't ever going to go away, and that it would be very, very difficult to replace some of the clothes because of my size. So I just started hiding my stuff during the periods when I wasn't feeling the need to dress up.
    Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
    There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
    Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.

  9. #9
    Person Angelofsomekind's Avatar
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    I never purged. I always thought that if I wanted to stop dressing I needed to have access to clothes. If I don't dress because they aren't here I don't know if I really stopped or just don't have them. If I have clothes and still don't want to dress, then I'd know I'm really done with it.
    Fortunately I never got to the point where I really wanted to stop.

  10. #10
    Platinum Member
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    For me, the biggest deterrent to purging has been the full realization that I'd regret it later. There have been times when I packed things away and put them in the attic, only to be retrieved a short time later.

  11. #11
    Aspiring Member
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    Put me in the group of those who have purged multiple times in the past, mostly because I thought I could stop or out of fear of discovery. Now that I am out to the wife, purging will be a thing of the past, never to be done again.

  12. #12
    Member Susan_Xdress's Avatar
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    Like the others, I have purged many times. Sometimes to stop myself dressing, and/or fear of being discovered.

    I stopped purging when I was in my own place and finally accepted what and who I am. What I am is a male to female cross-dresser, and who I am is both David and Susan.

    Are clothes an enabler?, well of course they are. What I did learn to accept was the simple fact that Susan did not magically leave me when her clothes vanished, she would always be there regardless.
    David wouldn’t vanish if he had no jeans to wear, anymore than Susan ceases to exist when there are no dresses in the closet.

    And oh how I still miss some of the first clothes Susan had.

  13. #13
    Member Melissa Jill's Avatar
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    Ive only purged once. I didn't have much anyway, but I thought I had grown out of it. I never really considered myself a crossdresser before, so I didn't know that it wasn't just a phase. Since knowing Im a crossdresser I have never purged, nor will I ever. I have 0 shame about this, but Im a youngster and grew up with the internet, so thats to be expected.
    The ultimate woman is a man - House

  14. #14
    Member Nicola's Avatar
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    I too stopped purging when I realised I am who I am and, as others have said, replacing things you have thrown out is just a waste of money.
    I still selectively get rid of items in order to stop my collection growing too large.
    The comming of the internet made me realise I wasn't the only person in the whole world who crossdressed and that made me feel a whole lot better about doing it.

    Nicola

  15. #15
    Carole carhill2mn's Avatar
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    A word of advice, if I may: do not throw anything away. I can virtually guarantee that you will resume crossdressing again in not too long a time. I hope that soon you will be able to reconcile yourself to the fact that you are a CD and always will be. T
    Accepting this will enable you to enjoy life more with much less stress.

    Good luck.
    Hugs, Carole

  16. #16
    Emerging Diva Nikki A.'s Avatar
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    I purged when I was younger and tried to quit. After I met wife #2 wanted to get rid of the last vestiges of wife 1 which I kept for myself. She knew about my dressing but it was no where near the level it is now.

  17. #17
    New Member
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    I purged a few times before I came out to my family. After my parents found out and I confessed and was allowed to dress all the time, I stopped purging. Never needed to after that!

  18. #18
    Junior Member Chantellexxx's Avatar
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    5 times now, & all I have ATM is a pair of panties......
    [SIZE="3"]ONLY DEATH IS REAL[/SIZE]

  19. #19
    Junior Member Alicia Waves's Avatar
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    Thrown everything away many times over many years. I miss some really cute outfits in both girl and boy styles. The last time was the worst....sigh..... on the upside it just means more time shopping!

  20. #20
    Member Bluesman's Avatar
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    I stopped purging, after several times, once I realized that the urge to crossdress was never going to go away, although it might lie dormant for many months or even years. And also once I accepted the fact that THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH IT. I count myself fortunate, at least economically, that during the periods where I was subject to purging, I didn't have a lot of clothes, so no big economic loss (although I still miss some of the items I threw out). Now, I would never purge. If I got to the point where I thought I was "over it" (Ha!) I would just put all my girly stuff in a box or suitcase and hide it away somewhere. My advice: never, ever purge (unless it's just stuff you don't like, doesn't fit anymore, worn out, etc.). Keep the good stuff for a few years at least. You'll come back to it, and be glad you still have it.

  21. #21
    Member Delila's Avatar
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    I stopped purging when I threw all of my men's underwear away. When I get the urge which I am sure many of us do my logic kicks in and reminds me that one I spent a lot of money on these clothes and two I would have zero underwear if I threw my panties away. It also helps to come to terms with what you are it is not going away if you really feel the urge it will come back. We have all or at least those who have purged have felt the strain and given in the key is to remind yourself however hard it may be that you are doing what is natural to you. Religion and society have no control over what you do in your personal time.
    Love like you've never been hurt,
    work like you don't need the money,
    and dance as if no one is watching.
    Delila

  22. #22
    Aspiring Member
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    I have purge 2 times both didnt last long And coming to under stand I will probably never stop dressing I enjoy it to much And the cost with a good bra costing close to $50.00 money is not a fun thing to throw away

  23. #23
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    My last purge was many years ago, when I married my wife, Now I have come to grips with who I am and my wife is also aware of the true me, There will be no purging in the future for me. Just learn to accept who you are, It makes life so much easier.
    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  24. #24
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    It's kind of like hitting yourself in the head...it hurts....
    When you do it again...it still hurts...
    When you do it yet again...damn, it still hurts....

    When you do it enough times and it hurts each time you learn not to do it again.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  25. #25
    New Member Sissy Michelle's Avatar
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    I tried to stop "dressing" once, many years ago thinking it would help stop me feeling so feminine and girly etc..and therefore help me "fit in" more as a male. I threw away or gave away all my heels, dresses, wigs etc...to other "girls" that i knew. As most of us agree........its expensive stupidity in the long run !

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