Hello. My question for y'all is what is your secret for going out crossed dress? What gives you the confidence? Especially when shopping?
Hello. My question for y'all is what is your secret for going out crossed dress? What gives you the confidence? Especially when shopping?
There is no secret. You just have to do it. Put on your big girl panties and leave the house like a man! lolz. Yes, it will scare the crap out of you the first bazillion times. But courage is not the absence of fear. It's being scared, and doing it anyway.
I am not who you think I am
SEE THREAD BUM RUSH !!!!! Anyway Im just a RETARD ,, Thats why I do it ,,,Im a known nut in man mode so whats the difference if Im in lady clothes . Sometime when I feel like Its just the SHOCK factor it makes me HAPPY to FREAK some people out !!!! Ill go in a store in drab an try on heels just to see the look on there face ,,,,,,,,, OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH B E HAIVE ,,,,,,,
Yull Find Out !!! lol,,,,
Don't thell anyone else.... I have large balls!! Lol.
You forgot to add BRASS to that statement. Or with the hockey, maybe they're large frozen balls. Either way, nothing can hurt them.Originally Posted by Karren Hutton
It must be a real pain when tucking
The secret is .... there is no secret. You just have to do it. And you have to know you are in control, that you are no breaking any rules, that you are entitled to be happy and you are not strange or weird. you are who you are.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
Lol. I thought that it might be something to get used to. Thnxs for the info.
Cody, as others have said, it just takes a strong desire to go out, enough courage to do it and as Reine said try to dress appropriately for the venue. If you are going out for the first time, why not take some small steps and build up that confidence. You can do a walk in a quiet park, drive around and stop at the drive through for a coke and fries, go shopping in male mode and try on shoes, Payless or at Macy's that always seems to be having shoe sales with all the sale shoes (one of each) out on a rack sorted by size. All these activities help. Another thing to develop is that "I don;t care what others think or say" attitude. That is a bit harder, but you will need a thick skin for those surprise moments of looks, stares, snide comments by others that do happen to some people. Good luck and go for it.
Going out shopping dressed? HA HA HA HA! Yeah, rite! As if shopping in drab isn't stressful enuff!
Give me Ebay, the web, mail order, and thrift stores in drab! That's how I shop! No stress, EVER!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
A desire to be who and what I am and am not mixed with a healthy does of flat stubbornness as well.
"You are not an accident, nor are you malfunctioning. You are performing EXACTLY as coded." For many "Man in a Dress" is the worst atrocity commit-able; for me it's just reality. Click to Learn About Me. Click to Complain About Me! There is a fine line between brutal honesty and honest brutality. It is rarely in the same place for the sender and the receiver.
My secret when I started was that I didn't care. I had been called names by passers-by all my life. Ignorant dweebs were going to insult me no matter what I did, so I figured I might as well do as I pleased.
Oddly, the random insults from passers-by pretty much stopped once I started dressing, even though I have never "passed". I do not have an real explanation for that, but it corresponded to me gaining more self-confidence, and corresponded to me refusing to be a victim. And if due to unconscious factors I somehow used to look "wrong" as a guy and people were seizing on that -- well, now those characteristics are more appropriate to me as I no longer present as male.
Cody, you just put one foot in front of the other and do it. Once I am out in public there is no point in being fearful. I am just what I am, a tall, not too attractive 50ish woman. I go about my business, do what I want, and enjoy the experience.
It was scary the first time, but it was also so exhilarating that I've looked forward to every outing since. The exhilaration has waned, but I still feel a very nice calm when I'm out dressed.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
As most will respond, there is no secret. In my case, I imagined what the worst thing is that could happen. I might be embarrassed. That's it. Still no one will know me and those who may "out me" are not known to me. So how bad could it be? Not bad enough to keep me inside. Go out once and it is easier th next time and so on. Remember, you are doing nothing illegal. Embarrassment is the worst case scenario while shopping.
The first few times out the door will be pure terror. You will soon find though how much pleasure you get from going out and about while dressed. Pull up your big girl panties and go out the door. Please share with us the story of your first adventures.
When you feel the time is right, you will do it. I express who I am and that is it. The biggest obstacle is ourselves, most people don't even notice, and of those that do most will say nothing or accepting. That leaves a very small section that may say anything bad or embarrassing. Worst thing I've heard so far was an older gentleman held a door open for me and called me sir (I thought I was looking pretty good that day.)
Hey Raine: I consider myself slim at five foot eleven and one hundred seventy pounds, especially by todays standards where a size medium is NOW
12-14 and not 8-9 as it was as recently as the 1990s. At looking at those models that you said were good for the runway but not good for dana (and I
am not questioning your fashion sense or my lack of one) why would I be so obvious? I think for a person wanting to and eventually going to venture
out, any age appropriate outfit should be ok especially the cute pantsuite.The models were all rather tall and very skinny (especially the last girl on the
right in the first photo, who just might need a Little Cesars Pizza-Pizza meal - not the snack) please show us some better examples of dress, from a
females perspective....dana
It is such a rush really. Think of it like a roller coaster. You are really scared and nervous on the way up the first drop and then you sit there for a second. Next, you are tearing down the hill and it is quite fun!!! :P
Just MAKE yourself do it, if that is what you desire. Once you do it the first time your cherry is popped ^^
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
No secret. At some point, my apprehensions were overcome by the desire to experience more of life than the confines of my home and backyard. I couldn't have predicted that would happen, but one day, rather than changing back into drabs simply to move a sprinkler, I thought "what the heck" and walked out the front door en femme. As others have said, the world didn't end and I suddenly felt free to be myself.
Oh my, I have no secret, where did you hear that there is any secret behind it, actually whom did you hear it from, I mean like a person that suggested anything as such to you, you know, like a friend or someone you know..........what is their name, where do they live........I am just asking casually you know, like nobody that is in any way connected to the secret organization or nothing. I mean jeeeees, that would be funny, wouldn't it.......how come I am not laughing?.......well......I laugh on the inside.....anyway....good talking to you, I will be your close friend.....Very Close Friend!
i quit thinking what other people think, after that it was easy.
i actully enjoy being outed sometimes especially by sales associates
they seem to love it.
Rose give me a shout when your going and i will come with you, you never know we might get invited in for tea
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIGPIC]
Hugs J-JAY
Never underestimate the power of brains and a push up bra.
Never complain about growing old, far too many people have been denied that privilege".
It's the knowledge that if people who disapprove should read you, they will keep their opinions to themselves. And the knowledge that the majority of people don't care what the people they won't ever see again are wearing.
Put yourself in the same shoes. You are out somewhere and you see someone dressed in a way that you believe is unusual. You might glance at them twice, but then you'd go on your way and attend to your own business. If they should ask you for the time or for directions, you'd be nice and answer their question.
Having said that, you will place yourself at an advantage if you dress appropriately according to the venue, meaning you should wear what other GGs are wearing, with not too much makeup and no platinum blonde cheap wig that screams, "CD". When in a nightclub you can dress a bit racier, but at the mall (for example) most women dress like this:
http://www2.pictures.zimbio.com/gi/C...ShF-Up2m0l.jpg
http://www.vervemag.com/storage/may-...et-1-Alpha.jpg
http://us.123rf.com/400wm/400/400/st...pping-mall.jpg
Good luck!
Last edited by ReineD; 03-04-2012 at 11:19 PM.
Reine
Reine,
You must patronize a better class of malls!
Lea
well, I do have a bit of a secret about shopping...and I perfer to shop in drab! I guess I just love the expectation of and SA's eyebrows if and when he/she realizes that whatever I'm buying is for me. Then again, I'm easily amused
tina
