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Thread: How to start a conversation?

  1. #1
    Happy to be alive. Wonderwho's Avatar
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    Wink How to start a conversation?

    I am new to site and still learning the proper way to create posts.
    What is the correct way ( if there is a way) to approch someone that you have a GOOD
    feeling is a CD? I am not sure of myself and would not want to insult someone or make a fool of myself. I can do that any time.
    It may be that I am so afraid after all these years to be out that I feel that if someone ask me I would freak out. I would really like to meet someone to talk face to face to help me find out
    where I am going.
    This site has been a real help and I am sorry to the moderators for not getting the posting right.
    WONDERWHO

  2. #2
    Platinum Member
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    Wonder, could you clarify your question a bit for me? Who do you want to approach and why? Is it someone you know well and frequently engage in conversation? If so, you could use casual conversation to make it apparent that you have no aversion to transgendered people, or even are supportive of them. (Not sure how one works that into a casual conversation...) but, you shouldn't presume that your "good feelings" justify asking them. If they want to come out to you, they will. Otherwise, leave it alone.

  3. #3
    Happy to be alive. Wonderwho's Avatar
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    As I have not gone outside the house dressed but have gone to a small used clothing store and purchased some things
    the owner has , a woman about my age has always been very helpfull. To the extent of helping me find sizes that really fit
    showing me things that were not on the rack yet. She has never asked but then I have always said they were for my wife.
    I am not good at reading people but she always looks just right and has always held my hand and said (stand tall and dont look back.
    Iwould love to ask but am afraid to insult her.
    Wonderwho

  4. #4
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
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    Building on Kim's suggestions, you might just gamble and ask her if the clothes would fit you. Yes, there is risk in that you may not be able to go back there. You might just ask, "Do you know much about cross dressing?". That way there is no acknowledgement about either of you but it sure leaves the door wide open. The cross dresser could always be a friend.

  5. #5
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    So what you're asking is if you should tell the owner of the clothing store that you are buying clothes for yourself? Is that correct? If so, I would say certainly. She is probably already under that impression.

  6. #6
    Just Kate Kaitlyn26's Avatar
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    Nowadays conversation in a lot of cases comes down to one person spewing words and feelings while another person listens the entire time and normally feels bored or even agitated. I say find the person and start spewing about how much you love crossdressing. If they try to cut in then let them talk. Normally you should continue talking over them while focusing entirely on yourself unless you want the person to think you're uncool . They'll probably inform you that they are a crossdresser, or just make up a quick excuse to leave your personal area and then avoid you in the future.
    "I am the beginning and the end. I bring order into chaos. "
    "I never tell the truth, because I do not believe such a thing exists. Truth, is in the eye of the beholder."
    "Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self serving, I shall simply say, good luck."
    "We give no crap, and we take very little."

  7. #7
    Gold Member JenniferR771's Avatar
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    Just ask if you can try on some of the dresses. If she is cool with that...then tell her you used to be a crossdresser--if she is still cool--you still are and need more dresses.

  8. #8
    Just Kate Kaitlyn26's Avatar
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    "Hi I'm Kate I really really really like crossdressing. It's so liberating and makes me feel at ease. I'm not that great at passing but I don't care because it makes me happy and I'm not here to make everyone else happy. I mean I can try but isn't that really difficult to do. Omg I tried that once and I went insane for a little while and I had to stop trying to make everyone happy and start crossdressing again. Some people don't like crossdressers or crossdressing but I think it's really awesome and adds to my personality and is a very valueble experience. What do you think?"

    How to ask if someone is a crossdresser without actually asking.^^

    Explanation: You mention the subject along with several directions to take and then give the person an opening to tell you by asking an open ended question. They may not even admit it outright but they may sidestep a declaration and give you a small hint.
    Last edited by Kaitlyn26; 03-09-2012 at 02:45 PM.
    "I am the beginning and the end. I bring order into chaos. "
    "I never tell the truth, because I do not believe such a thing exists. Truth, is in the eye of the beholder."
    "Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self serving, I shall simply say, good luck."
    "We give no crap, and we take very little."

  9. #9
    . Aprilrain's Avatar
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    I would not ask anyone i saw out in public if they are a CD or TS. If you want to meet others like you go to a support group or CD social event.

    In all likelihood if the woman in question is indeed a genetic male who presents as a female every time you see her she is TS and not a CD. Its highly unlikely that a true CD would go to the effort of working "en femme" even if she owned the store.

    As a TS I can say with a high degree of certainty that if you ask this woman if she is a CD or a TS and she is a TS or a GG she would be offended.

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