Are you okay with being transgendered?

[Marleena]

There have been a lot of threads lately dealing with what others think of us, now it's our turn. It doesn't matter if you're TS/IS/CD/TG this is just to see if you've accepted who are you are. We all have struggled with it at some point.

Have you accepted it, if so was there a turning point or "lightbulb" moment?

For those still struggling with it what is causing your turmoil? Are you hoping, or trying to make it go away?

Basically what I'm asking is how are you dealing with it?

[whowhatwhen]

I'm at the 'resigned acceptance' stage, that is, I know that how I feel is never going to go away and that pretending otherwise is just going to take down myself and possibly others in the future.
Full acceptance will come when I know just how deep the rabbit hole goes.

Right now I'm dealing with it by distracting myself if I get caught in an infinite loop of self questioning.
On the whole, I would have rather been 'normal' like everyone else.

[Cynthia Anne]

I deal fine with it thank you! However if I had a choice I'd be one or the other! Preferridly' an F not a m! Hugs!

[JohnH]

Yes, I am trangendered and that's OK. And it's OK with my wife.

I am on M2F HRT and I feel a sense of calm and the ability to concentrate on complex topics. In fact my wife suggested the HRT in the first place. She sensed that I felt a lot better when I cross-dressed and shaved my body.

The transgendered aspects of me are not going away, nor am I trying to make it go away.

Johanna

[Deborah]

"Are you okay with being transgendered?"

Yes but i'd rather be a woman

[Kristy_K]

By accepting my transgender as part of me leaves me free to live my life happy and free of any guilt. And that is such a wonderful way to live.

Kristy

[diannecourtney]

I think being a lady is the neatest thing to be, all those goodies that one can slip in to, its to bad that there is some loose ends to deal with.
After reading the many thoughts, I have a more serious observation than above, oh yes being a lady is soooo cool but as the ex has said many times over, you will never return to manhood, and why should one wish to.

[kimdl93]

In short - yes. I'm very happy with my life and my identity as a TG person. Acceptance came in stages, beginning years ago in therapy, which got me past the "I'm a pervert" stage to the point where I could honestly admit that I was TG. Later, being accepted by my then gf was a big step towards living happily as a TG. More recently, expressing this part of myself on a routine, daily basis has been transformative. Instead of stealing a moment here or there, I can live it. And finally, I genuinely enjoy being able to go out into the world, being out to people I know, as well as doing both the routine and special things as a woman.

[JessHaust]

Yes! I like to consider myself 'gender enhanced'. To be able to see things from both worlds, to expierence life as both male and female is a gift, and one well worth embracing.

[sandra-leigh]

There's a phrase my therapist and I have taken to using lately, "It is what it is."

Wishes are not horses, my mother isn't getting any younger; my boss would rather retire than learn how to manage people; my wife doesn't see anything wrong with leaving 6 pairs of shoes strewn on the stairs; my mother-in-law has high-grade dementia and will never get better; the publication ban I am under for vast numbers of topics is Prior Restraint for the rest of my life (and beyond); friends move away without telling me or leaving any contact information; I am still recovering from a Depressive Crisis 9 years ago that still makes it impossible for me to work regular hours. Oh yes, and I'm transgendered.

I had a lot of struggles as I went through the CD'ing stage to the point of worrying about trans, a lot of "I need to do this and I don't understand it". I fought hard on the question of whether I was TG or not, as I had no intellectual proof, nothing but bare hints from my past. I was a guy as I grew up, and I didn't question that; my wondering as a teen what it was like to be female was from the starting perspective of knowing I was not female. I was a social mis-fit to be sure, but I had no reason back then to think I was outside the category of male. My GID was somewhat of a surprise to me, and I adapted as a survival tactic. No matter what I was back then, I am trans now. No matter how well I could do cartwheels when I was a teen, I have a "problem" back now. Life changes. I adapt.

[rachaelsloane]

I've got to agree with Jess, "To be able to see things from both worlds, to expierence life as both male and female is a gift, and one well worth embracing".
I have never worried too much about and I'm just having fun enjoying life to the fullest.
Who took my glass of wine?

[docrobbysherry]

While being "TG" sounds like a good excuse for what I do, Marleena, it's just TOO EASY for me!

When I began dressing about 16 years ago, I thot I must be gay! I dressed in a vacuum for the next 10+ years. During which I decided I wasn't gay, but wasn't aware of the TG/TS terms. When I came out here 4+ years ago, everyone said, "Well, if u dress, u MUST be TG"! But, I've never yet felt TG!

Maybe I'm just stuck in the "Pervert" stage Kim mentioned above!?

[Tina B.]

Sandra Leigh, and her Therapist, sum it up for me. It is what it is!
When I finally realized this is just who I am, and it is who I'll be the rest of my life. I stopped fighting it. I would still rather be one or the other, don't even really care which, but that's not the hand I was dealt. Thirty five years ago, I told my wife about me, she was more accepting than I was, and helped me learn to accept myself. Now it's just is no big deal to either of us, I dress when I need too, yes need, I am compelled to it. Wife is cool with it, and then the rest of the time, we ae just any other old couple.
Tina B.

[Michelle 2]

Jess has summed it up nicely and this is the way I feel. Coming to the realization and acceptance that you are "gender enhanced" is no easy task for anyone of us. But once achieved it opens a whole new perspective on the world and life in general. Like many here I am very happy to have this very special " gift" bestowed upon me. I am a trasgendered person and proud to be a member of this sorority

[STACY B]

Shoot yea ! I can holler louder than any girl , Pee outside in a dress an not take down my pantyhose , I tell ya what Ill bet if someone was in a burning building or car they would not care if I was a man or woman as long as I was strong enough to get there azz out ! HOT,,,,,,OHH,,,OHHH,,,HOT,,,HOT,,,,,, SUPA STAR !!!

[Cheryl T]

I'm very comfortable being TG. I've actually been this all my life but have gone through all the "term" variations that time has brought. Originally I was a TV until that term became *******ized. Then it became CD which is clinically more accurate.
I'm most comfortable with TG though as it more fully expressed me. I'm more than CD, yet not enough to be TS so being TG is a comfortable place for me.

[Jocelyn Quivers]

I'm fine with it and just accept it as how I was created and no changing that reality. A personal early life crises in my early 20's brought me to the conclusion that my entire existence in male mode at the time consited of trying to "cure" myself. Once I got over that bump in the road things became a lot easier. Now it's just dealing with how far down the TG spectrum I'm heading and a what pace I am doing so.

[suchacutie]

I'm more than fine with being transgendered. I've known for almost 6 years and from the very first second it was as though it was someone saying, "well, obviously you're transgendered"! Since Tina has been a joint project with my wife, it's been just about perfect. My male self is better for it, I understand myself more and more, and my body is better for it, to be honest. If there is a negative it's that there is not enough time in my life to slice in the significant time that Tina could use at this point to develop fully. That's a pretty small negative in a sea of positive!

[Emily Ann Brown]

I accepted being TG a long time back. Since then I have been VERY happy! Only my workfriends don't know it. They just think I'm gay or weird..when is fine with me. Not a reason to fire me. NOT YET!!! HAHAHA

Em

[Stephanie Michelle]

I have always accepted the fact that I am transgendered. Since coming out to my GF and the way she has embarrassed it, I am now getting more comfortable about going out from the confines of my home with her right by my side.

[ArleneRaquel]

I accept, cherish, and embrace my transgenderism. Since my acceptance I have lived a kinder, gentler life and I love it.

[Lorenqt]

I have come to accept that I may be transgender. At this time, I'm not really pursuing it (talking to a head shrink, going on HRT).

I have always known that I'm different. As a kid I always hated myself (My parents had nothing to do with this, they were very loving and caring.), and even made repeated attempts to kill myself. I never really fit in, was always small for my age, wasn't very good in sports. When I went to high school, I did things a young male was "supposed" to do. I had a lot of friends, cut classes, got into fights (I was really good at that), chased skirts. With all that, something was still missing. Then I started dressing. At first is was kindda a fetish. As time went on, dressing became more and more of a lifestyle. I never really gave it much thought before. I love being able to dress and hate having to go back to boy mode. Over the past few months I've thought about it more and more. I believe that I might be transgendered. When that realization hit me, all those dark, self-destructive thoughts disappeared.

It feels soo good to know who you are.

[Erina]

Well. It would be nice to drop it; male living can be cool, might be able to get a hobby or something and live life. But I´m always trying, haven´t really managed to drop it. It is always going to remain nice having these thoughts that are nice to think of.
It often gets stressful. I just listen to music, go running, etc. If that won´t work which it rarely ever does, I´m just trying to wait it out. Others might do something else than suppressing that stress, what you're supposed to do I don’t know. Feels like there´s really no good answer to it. If that means that I´m suppressing it then I am. However I am not beating myself down about it.
Waiting for that lightbulb moment to come and I´ll know what to do.

[Foxglove]

Question, Marleena: if I'm not OK with being TG, what are my options? Can I return the goods and get my money back? No? Well then, I suppose I'll just have to put up with it, won't I?

It was lurking on this forum that finally made me see I needed to face up to things. I didn't lurk long before I joined. I saw I had no reason to be afraid of other TG's. And that led me to think that maybe I had no reason to be afraid of myself.

My attitude is changing a bit these days, I think. We all talk about accepting ourselves. Or some people say they wish they weren't TG. As for me, in a way I like being TG. But what I'm mainly thinking these days is, what else could I be? I've always been this way. It's not a question of liking it or disliking it. It's more like, grass is green and water is wet and Annabelle Larousse is TG. How else could it be?

Best wishes, Annabelle

[Julia_in_Pa]

I accepted being intersexed long ago but that didn't mean I was to accept true self until my early thirties.
Finally after all was said and done I transitioned in 2006.
It's been over five years now of living as my true self and overall it's been a mixed bag of much loss and some gain.
I had to transition to not commit suicide but for the first few years I had a very difficult time seeing that transitioning was the correct choice I had made.
I wouldn't wish being IS on anyone and at the same time I wouldn't trade it for anything either.


Julia