Let me start with I usually stop drinking and have sodas long before I decide to take to the road. For many reasons the most important of which is I am too pretty to go to jail.
So tonight, I went out. Yeah I know that in and of itself is getting boring for most here. And in reality, nothing happened. A few people talked to me. A couple told me I looked nice. I have become a fixture at the bar. Call me "Norm".
The weather here has been almost summer like this week. It was about 80 today and I just HAD to get out. I put on a short black dress (about mid calf) and my heels, no stockings (I rarely wear them now) and my medium blonde wig
(Note, I write all this down because it is expected here to tell everyone what you were wearing. It would have sufficed to just say I was dressed in a dress).
I had a 7 up and sipped it for about an hour before I left. I do enjoy watching people and listening to music so that is a nice way to end the evening. I was getting hungry and the bar was getting crowded so I decided to go home.
After navigating the crowd and stepping out the front door;almost being knocked over by two guys being tossed out the side door, I headed to my car. I had arrived early enough that I got a primo parking space, it had curbs on three sides and was on the end so no one would park in front of me. I chose it because it was the least likely place someone would put a dent in my door.
So, as I walked toward where the car was I noticed that three of Denver's finest were parked in front of me and had their spotlights shining on the driveway. I was glad that I could walk fairly well in the 4" heels but still made sure I didn't wobble, thinking they were maybe looking for people who were drunk. As I approached my car, I motioned another car that I would be leaving and they could have my spot. That is when the officer walked over to me.
"I don't think they hit you." he said.
It was then I looked in front of my car to see the tow truck operator attaching his chains to...what I THOUGHT was MY car! Wait! I was legally parked. Why are they towing me? Then I saw that it wasn't my car but a dark blue car he was hooking up and the front of the car was near the windshield. It was wrapped around a telephone pole.
"They hit the car next to you but we have talked to her already. Would you mind backing up about three feet so we can see if your car is damaged?" I walked over and looked down, expecting to see the bumper pointed off to the left but it was OK. There was about one inch of space between the driver's door and my license plate. I looked up at the officer in shock I am sure. "Pure Darwinism huh?" he asked me. I walked to my door and opened it, immediately slipping off the curb because I wasn't paying attention. I backed up and slid out again and looked at the front of the car. It appeared ok. The cop shined his flashlight over it and said I was good to go.
I shook my head and said "It would have been a long walk home in these heels otherwise."
"Have a nice rest of the night ma'am, Sometimes you get a good parking space" he told me as I climbed in and drove away. The car using the pole as a hood ornament was totaled I am sure. The Jeep who parked next to me on the grass was only slightly damaged.
I drove home in disbelief. I had always planned what I would do if a guy got too pushy, if there was a sobriety check, if I broke a heel, but I never thought that my car would be a target sitting there minding it's own business. To make thing worse I had left my cell at home so I could not have even called someone. I guess this would be the closest call I ever had while out dressed.
The Denver police were very professional and kind through all this. I think I will take a week off from dressing now. OK I was going to anyway
If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:
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