Well Linda, some of us are willing to suffer the slings and arrows that come from intellectual honesty and a consistent perspective, and others are not.Originally Posted by linda allen
Well Linda, some of us are willing to suffer the slings and arrows that come from intellectual honesty and a consistent perspective, and others are not.
Facts are facts, Woman don't use men's bathrooms.
I base it on the dearth of reports, which indicates that this is a non-issue. Have you any statistics to the contrary, other than the imaginings of a whacko state legislator?
There is no problem here that is not addressed by lewd behavior laws. The problem is that some would like a GM's mere presence in the facility to be defined as lewd.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
Maybe because most men's room have only 2 toliets and tons of urinals!
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Actually, they do, when the line for the women's room is too long and nature's call is too insistant.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
The first couple times I used the ladies room it wasn't a thrill I was feeling. Extreme nervousness and fear that almost overcame my need to use the restroom. Why you may ask? Well, despite being dressed and presenting as female my biggest fear was being confronted just trying to use the bathroom. I would try to use a unisex bathroom when ever possible.
As my confidence as a woman grew those feelings passed, now I just do what I need and move on.
I cannot wrap my head around the the thrill.
I would be terrified to enter the ladies room.
Must be a California thing! I have never seen a woman use a men's bathroom and I lived all in a lot of places....not CA though......
Hi Kristy, I have been to many large sports events here in SoCal, on several occasions the lines for the ladies rooms was so long that the GG's were using the mens room (no line) and no one complained about that!
"Missed it by that much!"
Oh, and it's not a California thing at all. Google "I used the mens room" and you'll see that women all over the nation (the world, actually) are using the men's facility and proudly writing about it on the web.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
Not California at all. Lots of times at concerts and such the line at the women's restroom is so long they use the men's restroom. Drinking and recreational drugs may have something to do with it.Must be a California thing! I have never seen a woman use a men's bathroom and I lived all in a lot of places....not CA though......
[SIGPIC]http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=82706&dateline=137762 0356[/SIGPIC]Linda
It's not a problem I have because I don't go out dressed as a female. One thing that strikes me in reading the long (and interesting) string of posts in this thread is the astonishing determination to avoid calling a lavatory a lavatory - or even a toilet! Why do so many refer to "rest rooms" or even "bathrooms" when, with very few exceptions, these places are neither? Are CDs particularly squeamish about mentioning lavatories? Like one other poster here, I am used to the much more honest French style where the "toilette" or "WC" is very commonly unisex and nobody bothers who is in there! Compare that to here in the conservative UK where I have even encountered a gents toilet temporarily closed because a female cleaner was working inside! How strange we all are.
I don't think we are "painting CDs as perverts", but some members of the non CD public do. Some females have been raised to fear any man. Some have reason to, based on past experiences.
At any rate, there are "perverts" walking this earth and even if only one male in one thousand gets a thrill from walking into the ladies restroom, that's the one the public will be thinking about.
Please remember, not everyone on this forum lives in your part of the world. In the USA, a "lavatory" is the bowl you wash your hands in or a "sink". A "toilet" is the thing you sit on to pee or pooh.
In the USA, you will often find signs in businesses pointint to the "restrooms".
And yes, they are often closed while being cleaned by a member of the other gender.
Last edited by Nigella; 03-29-2012 at 11:56 AM. Reason: merged consecutive posts
[SIGPIC]http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=82706&dateline=137762 0356[/SIGPIC]Linda
Ummm, OP said it....
So from the root of the thread comes a need to call out such a statement for what it is. Using the restroom should not be "thrilling". Getting such thrills in a public place, especially in one which tends to cause divide as many (if not most) Muggles would just assume that we not use the ladies room when out presenting as female, is out of line and had to be addressed.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
The problem is that the thrill aspect is very real, and its not one out of 49...its not 3 out of 49.. its not something people admit easily. getting "thrilled" is primal...it just happens...
This is not about predators and creeps..it much more basic than that..
what rights to women have in their own gender exclusive bathrooms?
I recall taking a friend to the mall, and everywhere she went she just couldn't wait to go the bathroom...she couldn't wait to go in the changing room... at macy's in the big changing room she handed her phone to me and whispered.."take my picture!!" ugh..
she's a nice person..but cmon... i didnt feel there was sexual things going on...but PART OF HER CD'ing was the experience of going into women only places...this is just not right...she does not identity as a woman...she views herself as gender fluid, but its a creepy way to express it to sneak into a dressing room and have your picture taken...
the idea that there are gender neutral bathrooms does not change the fact that there are gender specific bathrooms as well
...in fact, the existence of gender neutral bathrooms underscores the validity of gender specific ones too..in a perfect world there would be a gender neutral bathroom in every public space i guess
and so the question is this...how do you as a person that feels comfortable and right about being in the ladies room, with no thrills let the women in the bathroom know? How does your need to pee in the ladies compare to other peoples need to feel comfortable and safe in their specifically gender exclusive public bathrooms..??
Too bad for them? Get over it...
or too bad for you? Get over it..
It's a toughie
Lorna, It's called 'American English' ! which itself is an oximoron. I you came to the states and asked for directions to the Water closet (WC) most likely you would get no response or directions to where the water heater is located!
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I suppose on the plus side I can say that never have I seen a CD in the womens bathroom in my normal day to day life. Sure there might have been someone with a great presentation that I overlooked, but hey if they have a great presentation then theres no reason for them to even worry about being detected.
So perhaps the whole discussion revolves around more of a fantasy than anthing since as I said I have never seen a CD in the bathroom. Crap I have virtually never seen a CD in the normal world come to think of it. Well that is dressed, I am sure I have seen a ton of them dressed as boys but as girls virtually never.
That's it! "Toilet" is considered mildly vulgar here and most people ask for the "restroom" "Men's" or "Ladies'." Ladies who are particularly proper refer to it as the "Powder Room" although that term is much less used these days.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
These silly euphemisms for public toilets hark back to a more "innocent" (or is that "repressed"?) era, starting in Victorian times and lingering through the conservative 1950's. This was a time when sex was considered "dirty" and "shameful" and wasn't talked about in polite society. Consequently, women were made to feel ashamed of their bodies and the associated perfectly normal bodily functions, and these things were only whispered about furtively.
Hence, that silly terminology "feminine hygiene products", which falls into the same category and is still in use today, but is slowly losing ground as people are becoming more open (and dare I say "adult") about such topics.
In Michigan I am by law required to use the restroom of the gender on my drivers license, I recommend you check the laws they can vary from state to state. Of coarse there are other options and depending where you are. Asking permission is easier than begging for forgiveness
The way to gain respect is by showing everyone it can be done respectfully. You go there to do what is required, not to hang out and chat (best practice is to keep quiet, just nod and smile). I don't care what gender you are or what room you use, you are there to do your business and get out, not to do anything else. It is important to respect the local laws though unless you want to be the one to contest them in court.
Chickie
I thought you were a big CD supporter Kate! "I even take CDs shopping on occasion" or have you forgotten all of those posts from a few years back? I am not quite sure what is sadder. Your constant down talking to CDs on this forum or the fact that you have some need to do so. You constantly post in CDs threads and make statements like "I am a real girl and etc..." So before you were a real girl, what bathroom did you use!
I use the ladies, I present as a woman, live as a woman, shop as a woman and am accepted by my family and friends as a woman. I get no thrill by doing it. I have never gotten a second look or treated poorly and if anyone was upset about it they never mentioned it. And if they did I wouldn't really care. As a matter of fact where I live it is actually the law.
Living the life I choose!
Two great nations divided by a common language.One time we were shopping in Harrods, the terrific departmnent store in Knightsbridge London, and I got the call of nature. I turned to the sales associate and asked for the bath room. Embarrassed silence ensued, and it was quitye a bit until she figured out that I had no intention of bathing in the store, just wanted to do my business. The Brits hjave as many euphemisms for that room as we do, but the one they use the most is one that Americans would never use...you going to approach a stranger in a nice place and ask "where are the toilets?"
My favorite though is what they call them in Simpsons in the Strand, a very old, elegant British restaurant (which I highly recommend...the people from Lawry's the Prime Rib have told me that Simpsons was the moddel they used in building Lawry's. I these most dignified premises it is the Gentlemens Cloak Room and Ladies Cloak Room that you desire.
People who live in glass houses should pull the shades down!!
Do any of you truly believe that crossdressed men want to use the ladies room so that they can peek over or under the stalls? As John Stassel would say, "give me a break"
People who live in glass houses should pull the shades down!!
I agree, Chloe. A CD who is presenting as a female, but is still a functioning male, should avoid using the Ladies Room whenever possible. Plan A would be a "family" restroom; plan B would be your hotel room; Plan C would be a public Ladies restroom, if you are presenting as a female and can pass. If you are transitioning and are a full-time "girl" then you belong in the Ladies Room.I have noticed an increasing amount of posts stating that CDrs are using the ladies restroom when en femme. There is a certain thrill that goes along with doing this and where are we supposed to go anyway? but I have often wondered if this is what we should be doing. I have never used the women's restroom because it is disrespectful to women and our society not to mention illegal in many states and counties. The thought of guys (many of whom are straight) in the restroom with children or wives gives concern to many people. There needs to be a level of responsibility on our part if we choose to dress like this. We must accept all that goes with it. That is why I believer that the use of Ladies restrooms should be off limits. It will only cause greater disrespect to us and others. Many stores such as Kohls have "Family Restrooms." I think it would be promote greater respect if we would limit our use to these kind of restrooms.
Last edited by sfwarbonnet; 04-09-2012 at 01:44 PM.
Posting Permissions
