Suzy is not interested in why she is a C.D.

[suzy1]

Over the time I have been here I have noticed how important it is for some of us to try to understand why we C.D. And there is nothing wrong with that.
And I have let myself be drawn into wondering myself a bit.

And then I got to thinking about it today.
I have no hang-ups about crossdressing. I am totally comfortable with who I am. And I love my life as a man/woman crossbreed, or mongrel? or weirdo?, or maybe just a nice mixture of the best of both sexes? [O.K. maybe the worst]

But it’s a waste of good fun time to get all hung up on why I am like I am. I just don’t care!

I understand why some search for answers but I have better things to do. Like looking for that new dress.

Just a ramble from Suzy.

[darla_g]

agreed. when i first got here i thought it was to figure out why i do the things i do. after a while i discovered was that it just didn't matter. I'm not hurting anyone and just expressing myself

[Nichola]

I've given up, I'm confused & I probably always will be as to why I'm like this....So I may as well make the best of it & have some fun

[Alice B]

I like the description of "mongrel" Fits me well and like you I have no hang ups or illusions as to who and what I am.

[Miriam-J]

I never gave much thought to the 'why' until the last month and a half, since I joined this forum. Since then I've read many speculations, and even added a few of my own. I've also read the book "My Husband Wears my Clothes" (and I highly recommend it). After all is said and done, I think I'm now comfortable with accepting that it just "is", as you say Suzy. It's helped that I've explored this while also engaging my wife in the same conversations so she can come to the same conclusions. She'd support either way anyway, but it's good to have her on board for that.

On the other hand, I'm still an engineer darn it! I have this discomfort at anything that I can't explain, so I expect it'll keep popping through my fuzzy little noggin for the next few decades anyway.

Miriam

[Cynthia Anne]

Tell it like it is Suzy! That's great! But now I'm confused and hurt! I was under the impression that you cd so you can come on here and visit with ME!!!! Hugs!

[kimdl93]

I've given subject a lot of thought, read a great deal on the subject and understand that there are a wide range of possible contributing factors.

None of which make a whit's bit of difference in the quality of my life. The important thing for me to acknowledge is that I am a CDr (or TG or however one chooses to label it); there's noting wrong with it, and I can lead a happy, fulfilling life, just as I am. ...and dog-gonnit, people like me

[JessHaust]

I never really cared why, although for years Intried to ignor it. Now I'm far more interested in how to best celebrate it!

[RADER]

Maybe we CD because we want to, and since it is against societies rules; So
we want to push the envelope a lot and dress in a dress.
I know it is a thin excuse, but it is all I came up with for now.
Rader

[Foxglove]

I want to know. Just as it's in my nature to be TG, it's also in my nature to want to know why I am TG.

Will someone say that this bit of knowledge is immaterial? I ask, how can you know the value of a bit of knowledge until you have it? You can't judge the value of a thing you don't possess, a thing you have never even glimpsed.

I think perhaps one day we will know why some people are TG. There has been some research done recently that has presented a very interesting theory, perhaps the correct one. If this one is incorrect, perhaps the next one will be. Some day we will know, and I have a hard time imagining that that bit of knowledge will be useless to us. Suppose it changed the way society as a whole views us. Would that be useless?

Annabelle

[KaTanya]

I'm more interested in why Suzy is so cool. There's something at work there I can't put my finger on.

Although that would take away time that could be spent finding the perfect shoes.

[Cheryl T]

I cared why and searched for more years than I care to think about. All that time wasted when all I wanted was to be me.

[Gaby2]

I do wonder why I'm a CDer, Suzy... and enjoy wondering... questioning...
A desire to wear what society deems "womens' clothing" certainly has confused me for most of my life.
But I don't let that trouble me as much anymore.
Shoes, cloths, and dresses in particular seem to choose me... I just oblige.
Gaby

[Karren H]

Now I'm interested why Suzy's not interested?

[drushin703]

suzy:

I was in Walmart this afternoon, picking up a perscription when a nondescript gg pased before me. She was clad in some pajama bottoms and flats
that slid when she walked, a unbuttoned down filled coat, no makeup, talking on a cell phone and with a untity wig on that sat on the back of her head. Now
I wish never to pass any judgement on anyone else on this planet and try very hard not to. The possible reasons for looking this way.............well
perhaps she was in a hurry, had to drop off the kids, didnt have time to do her hair, was
hustling to another job, bussied out - trying to make ends meet..But as cds we have all had those moments when we get in our cars and say "wow,
I look way better than that". She was vizard, pejorative in all respects, her ineptitude almost a disguise to the female form.



For those of us who worship femininity and are intollerant against any overt assault against it, there may be good reason to keep this (our) crossdressing
species alive......Yeah, thats it! Thats not why we started dressing nor the fun and pleasure we get out of it. We (I) cd as a continuence of alluring love
and beauty for anything muliebrile..........this position is unrelenting.....dana

[Soriya]

There is always a reason for everything and this is no different.

I had always wondered why since an early age but that is my nature, I am one who seeks to understand why things are the way they are and happen. My CD experiences where always in short 1 to 3 year phases and each phase brought on a whole new round of confusion and frustration because it didn't add up. Prior to a couple years ago, the last was 16 years ago at 25. I didn't have the internet yet so it was always something that bothered me as I had no information and nobody to talk to. After a few years of clearing everything else from my past, the time came to address my CD'ing. I wasn't expecting it and it only surfaced after I met a Post-op TS and became friends with her. I had sworn to myself to take my CD'ing to the grave but once her and I became friends, I was compelled to tell her. She encouraged me to try it again purely to figure out why I had done it and so I did. After months of dressing, searching the web, reading about others experiences on this forum and others for countless ours, I found my answers. Since then, my CD'ing has all but faded away as the reason I did it in the past no longer exists within me. I still do dress every few months or so but now it's purely for fun to watch the transformation and see someone else in the mirror. It's the artist in me and now it's an artistic expression for a couple of hours when I am bored.

[suchacutie]

Well Suzy, there is a reason.

I'm sure in a few hundred years the brain will be completely mapped and as children we will all be afforded a brain scan and they will tell us what % of our brains are wired as woman and the probability of our desire to be those feminine selves for a certain part of the time.

Until then I'll just assume that my brain is in control and what I do is what it tells me to do

As you implied, it's so much easier that way

tina

[Marleena]

Suzy I'm not interested in why you are a CD either!!

I'm just glad you're you.

Marleena

[rachaelsloane]

But it’s a waste of good fun time to get all hung up on why I am like I am. I just don’t care!

Suzy,
Your words are so true as too many here all not able to enjoy CD'ng to it's fullest. I'm like you, why worry, just enjoy.
I'll have another glass of wine, please.
Rachael

[Noemi]

Thank You Suzy.
I spend allot of time figuring. It no longer helps me, if anything it is fuel for the fires of disenchantment.
Enchantment, magical girls. Like I am wearing a sky blue leotard with criss cross spaghetti straps in the back, under my boy clothes today and have my toe nails painted the same color...mmmmmmmmmmmmm More please.

I really needed to hear this today. I am on the cusp of accepting that Filomena exists( I mean come on already, I have been aware of her forever and a day, I am soooo thick).

It is OK to dress up and express myself, I do not have much of a choice any longer anyway. It really is exciting when I think this way, better then the depression I deal with because of my TGered self. For me to try to fit into a mans life just has not worked so well, maybe time to change my paradigm.

[Kate Simmons]

Well, don't tell anyone Hon but the real reason is that we don't want to look like Homer Simpson. D'oh!

[Barbara Ella]

I am very new to this, and my wife is newer, and she/we of course have a lot of questions. Slowly, we both are realizing that the why is not relevant to our happiness together. Our questions are now focusing on how we can make this work for us both to where we all will be happy. My focus is on being the best I can be for me, my family, and my wife. as that is the group my situation must deal with.

I am happy being me, and why is not my priority.

Babes

[DeeDeeB]

Suzy,

You express what most of us on this site are seeking. Acceptance of ourselves as CD. Without societal acceptance, it is hard to get through the stuff that the outside world throws at us. I am coming very close to that acceptance myself, but it has been through sites like this and TG conferences that has allowed me to get here. Without the support of others like us or who accept us, it is a very hard road to tread.

Dee

[Crissy Kay]

Maybe we CD because we want to, and since it is against societies rules; So
we want to push the envelope a lot and dress in a dress.
I know it is a thin excuse, but it is all I came up with for now.
Rader

I agree with Rader. I think its part of the reason that I cd, although I have not really thought that much on it. It, [cding], is an act of rebellion to some degree.

[sissystephanie]

I crossdress simply because I like to! Been doing it for the better part of 70 years and will continue as long as I can!!