Actually it wasn't time wasted because you did discover that you accepted yourself, you are at peace with yourself and you also know at this point that there is no agreed on reason for why mostly men do this. No real endeavor is a waste of time. everything is a learning experience and you always come away with some new understanding.Originally Posted by Cheryl T
I'm not really a "why" person about dressing (or anything else regarding me) either- I just am, and I'm happy and when things are good I'm just enjoying everything without a care in the world. As the great prophet of our times Robert Hunter once said:
Some folks look for answers
Others look for fights
Some folks up in treetops
Just look to see the sights
For myself crossdressing offered a back door into my mind to allow me to become what I already was but refused to give myself permission to be and now that I am I no longer need the reasons.
And fix! We need to be able to fix it too!
I'm also trying to figure out why I spend money on clothes and shoes and hours of time getting ready to go out en femme when I could just toss on jeans and a polo shirt and be more comfortable in male mode. The only answer seems to be "because I like it."
Of course, the same answer works for mountain climbing, river running, or any other adventure!
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
A very simplistic and easy carefree way to go about life, which I often tend to forget regularly. So this thread has helped me to get back on focus and to just stop asking why, just accept it as how I was made, and to enjoy life.
[SIZE="3"]MUSCULAR GIRLS ARE PRETTY!!![/SIZE]
Current Inspirational Song-"Running Free"- Kissin Dynamite
M-E-A-T, M-A-C-H-I-N-E, MEAT MACHINE!, MEAT MACHINE!!!
The Governor for President 2016!!
All I want for Christmas is an Anita Model Synth
There is a GOOD REASON for some of us to wonder, Suzie!
If u suddenly start dressing at age 50, with absolutely no warning in your entire previous life, u must wonder! Because if the DESIRE CAN APPEAR suddenly out of the blue, it mite DISAPPEAR the same way. Unless u can figure out what's going on!
If I had the desire to dress since I was a kid, I probably would have stopped thinking/worrying about it years ago!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
[SIZE="4"]Lots of great comments here, much better than anything I can come up with. Kudos to you Suzy in expressing what so many of us have also come to understand. There just ain't no good reason or way to explain it. It just is.
I do wish there were some easy answer I could give people when they are looking for an explanation of why this silly old gentleman likes being a girl on occasion! O well, I'd also like to be younger, better looking, have more hair, and bigger boobs![/SIZE]
Lynn Marie
Click here to see me on Flickr
Can I just chime in here for a minute. None of us really care why we cross dress. I don't care either why just when. But I think most of it is too much reading of the same answer. I have looked at the forum page and it tell a lot about what is going on here. Cause there are more crossdressers reading about why than there are crossdressers reading about how. Nobody or not many are in the beauty or clothing and shopping forums. Why I don't know but, I think we all just need to do some relaxing. There are more forums to read and not just the crossdressing one. Everyone should enjoy all the threads you want. I crossdress because it is easy and I know exactly what to do. Put on women's clothes and walk to places and smile a lot. Its fun and easy. Keep it up. Smooth cross dressing to all.
Tess
My three cents!
[COLOR="blue"]Contessa Marie D
I'm TG. A fem-male so I look male sometimes.
Dressing is necessary, the type of clothes you wear not so much.
This above all to thy own self be true!
i always had the urge too dress, just never did until i was fifty. now i wonder why i didn't start sooner. i do know that i am the same person inside but am much happier!! and you are so right suzy, why waste time with questions that we can't find answers to. just enjoy it...
paula
I think that's probably a very healthy way to look at CDing. I tend to think it can be quite detrimental to overanalyse the whole thing, you end up just concluding that it's either a genetic mutation or a deep Freudian mummy issue, neither of which is particularly helpful.
[SIZE="2"]Well, I have no hang-ups about crossdressing, either, just a healthy curiosity about how this miracle came about. It can’t hurt to daydream now and then, can it? I mean, I’m totally comfortable with who I am, indeed I have no choice in the matter – I’m about as contrived as that tree over yonder, and just as natural, but (gosh!), ain’t it WONDERFUL that it happened?!
I also have better things to do, such as keeping myself from being sucked into the black hole of reality, but I find myself on a discussion forum about crossdressing, one that I willingly joined, so I’m going to muse on the topic of crossdressing! It would be pretty boring if I posted things like: “Ho hum, I’m a happy crossdresser, la-di-da,” wouldn’t you say? Let’s be aware that there are others looking in who may not be comfortable with themselves or their curious compulsion to dress, and they may benefit from advice from well-adjusted individuals like ourselves…
You may notice I DON’T write, “Freddy doesn’t mind thinking about why she’s a crossdresser!” I could, but I won’t, since doing so would imply that there is a conflict going on between my real self, the one that everyone knows, and that “other” imaginary self that is somehow separate from everything I do – that conflict ALONE is worth considering, or worthy of dissertation, but don’t let me tell YOU what to do! It’s fun to crossdress, fun to not think to much about it, yet fun to wonder how or why it came about in the first place, so I shall do all of the above…
Actually, Earth was devoid of crossdressing until that fateful day when a comet, with our names on it, struck the planet broadside, showering the gender-specific mammals with fairy dust! If that doesn’t prompt Suzy to PM me, I don’t know what will…
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ah suzi...again you capture the the positive and this is why i find your posts so refreshing....i could not have said it better. it all starts from within....you gotta love who and what you are and you have a better chance of others doing the same...just saying....thanks suzi !
There is much comment here in numerous threads that sometimes push CDs to out themselves to their SO, otherwise they are lying and cheating, etc. If one never comes to some reasonable conclusion about why they do what they do, how are they to explain it to their SO? "Oh, honey, I don't know. I just do it. " Is that really going to answer a wifes questions adequately. These self outers are told to prepare--isn't that what examination is all about? To think about why we do what we do doesn't necessarily mean unlimited naval gazing or depression but trying to have some credible answer as to the why is worth the effort if people are to understand this particular passion of ours.
I tend to over think everything anyway and CDing is no exception. But, I also believe that, genetically, we all start as both and hormone levels push us toward our physical & psychic tendencies one way or the other. So, over analyzing is just my way of realizing and internalizing this truth. However, it CAN suck the fun right out of an otherwise great journey and mind opening life experience too. Everything in its own time and place!
Lilith
Please don't say "noone here cares"...I care & it just makes me feel like grade school when one person speaks their opinion as a mandate from ALL, like "everyone thinks you're a sissy", "we all think your wierd, gay, ugly,fill-in-the-blank juvinile smear" ...not accusing you of that, but just that using term "noone here" makes me feel that way and I don't like feeling like that. Please? Not trying to offend this early in my time here, just a humble request not to ne spoken for. ....Now, I can agree that there can be too much time spent on the "why"s and not enough on the "how"s, if one does want to pass an hour musing on the former, why make them feel bad for it? Such reflection can inspire confidence, build support, make connections to othrrs that have "been there", and all kinds of positive things that help one know themself better and build a support network in a lonely situation, such as recently losing a SO or job and could even prevent suicide & save a life. Let's spend or time in the forums best for us at that time & try only be supportive, positive, or silent on the threads we visit. I hope I don't hurt your feelings either....just don't like being spoken for or seeing anyone else made to feel isolated & "wrong" for having self-reflective thoughts. Please don't take this as my "calling you out" or anything of the sort, just simply how that phrasing made ME & only me feel....
I reach the stage of life where I really do not care how I got to where I am. As I retiree with ample one half community income, there are really minimal consequences of being outed. Now if I could get rid of the marital discord it causes (DADT) life would almost be perfect. Well, almost--I'd like to be a least a size 12!
when you got married, maybe your fiancee asked why you wanted to marry her, and you said knowingly "I love you". you searched you inner being and felt that was true. Now your wife wants to know why you like to dress and the best you can manage is "I don't care". A real answer might break the DADT roadblock. Just an opinion.
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