Am I real?

[Lawren]

His life's biggest disappointment is his utter failure to get a GG into his life. Did he create me to fill that void or just to cover it up?

Please forgive my melancholy but this one has got me almost in tears.

[CharlotteSomers]

I've often wondered this same thing myself. I have not had a long relationship with a GG for many years. It hasn't stopped me from looking though. I just try to accept it and live my life without sweating the small things.

[Dana]

The problem for me isn't finding a GG, its finding a GG who can accept, despite 5000 years of male dominated culturalization an socialization that some men have a strong femininie side which cannot be denied. I'm not really into guys. I am very turned on mentally, emotionally, physically and yes I would even say spiritually by women and by femininity! My last long term GF told me that my CD was a subsistute for an other wise healthy relatinship with a woman. I'll give her paritial credit! But, that's not all it is!
I haven't been in a long term relationship with a GG for seven years, by choice! I dion't have anything to prove to anyone, to include myself about being a man, nor validating nor proving my masculinity. I have long ago done that time and time again. Now, I just want to be me!

[Lawren]

I'm sorry girls. I didn't mean to start my own pity party. I just felt the need to talk to somebody who really understands. That kind of thinking leads straight down "Purge Lane" at breakneck speed. I guess I had a minor identity crisis there. Maybe it's time for a visit to the shrink but somehow I just know that I'll get some cookie cutter explanation from him that really won't be an answer at all.

LoL, Lawren

[CharlotteSomers]

That's ok Lawren. I really do know exactly how you feel. I'm sure lots of us here do. I've done the purging thing as well and it just doesn't work.

If you want to chat one on one, feel free to send me a PM.

[kristi cd]

I know what you mean. I've never been very good with the ladies to begin with and my dressing makes me even more timid. I guess I'm just need to learn to open up, but it's always been kinda hard for me for some reason. Oh well, sorry to unload on you all like that.

[jessicadiane]

Just be patient and you will find what you are looking for.There are some of us who already have and you will have a joy beyond measure

[Lawren]

Sometimes it's just not wise to examine oneself too closely.