Results 1 to 12 of 12

Thread: Nothing to do

  1. #1
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Born in Quebec, lived most of life in small town Central Ontario.
    Posts
    335

    Nothing to do

    Well I know there has to be something to do, but I am having trouble finding it.

    Just sat here making a mess of turn 1 of a wargame Leslie's thinks is the greatest game in 10 years. I just don't seem to get it.

    I can't seem to relate to any of his hobbies, and I'm soooo bored. I can't seem to think of anything 'I' want to do.

    I've talked with actual girls, one in a gaming store, 'so how would YOU make a wargame that would interest a girl? I think I actually surprised her as she simply couldn't think of anything.

    Sitting here waiting and waiting and waiting, do I get to be me, am I wanted as me. And all day long, sitting with almost nothing to do. I can't do laundry indefinitely.

    My role gaming planning seems ok. But I have been dwelling on how it being ME that is at the table will impact my Sunday evening gaming time with the guys.

    All I have, is I am so female feeling, with no prior actual experiences to base any of that on. I don't have the look (as of yet) and I have not made any reeeeeally overt statements backing me in a corner. All I have is the feeling. And my day has nothing that seems to be 'ME' in it.

    It's Leslie that has built the models for decades.
    It's Leslie that is the history and science nut.

    I'm currently just watching anime and watching the day pass by.
    I need some female clothing sooner or later, but shopping is not exactly a time absorbing activity I can do most of the day most of the week.
    And if I was there yesterday, chances are what is there today will be the same.

  2. #2
    Making a life for Tina! suchacutie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    4,235
    You are soooo right! My two gendered selves just don't have the same interests! My complaint is that when there are times Tina can't be around, those interests get shelved and sometimes projects are just so hard to get back into gear after a while!!!

    My line here says, "Making a life for Tina". I'm really serious about that line. It is who I am and what we've done. Tina is separate and deserves her own life. We're working on it!

    Looks like you are too!

    tina

  3. #3
    Aspiring Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    676
    What you're describing sounds more like depression to me. Losing interest in hobbies, poor concentration, boredom, looking for things to do but not finding anything, passing time with nothing to show for it, and endless rumination.

    Perhaps I'm reading too much into it from my own experiences, but this sounds really familiar.

  4. #4
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    8,393
    If I could only like to take out the garbage weather dressed or in DAB, then life would be good.
    Rader

  5. #5
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    South Western PA
    Posts
    24,704
    I wish I had nothing to do sometimes...... I'd just set there and relax.... For like 5 minutes. Them I'd go ice skate or take a walk or build something or upgrade something. Why don't you go volunteer somewhere. Help out your fellow man... Woman. Whom ever. You can set around and whine about nothing to do when your dead! Lol. Get off your ass and away from the keyboard. Now!!
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  6. #6
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    8,393
    Quote Originally Posted by Karren Hutton View Post
    I wish I had nothing to do sometimes...... I'd just set there and relax.... For like 5 minutes. Them I'd go ice skate or take a walk or build something or upgrade something. Why don't you go volunteer somewhere. Help out your fellow man... Woman. Whom ever. You can set around and whine about nothing to do when your dead! Lol. Get off your ass and away from the keyboard. Now!!
    Karren; You are rite on........ So many could help out doing something that is both helpfully
    to others, and be beneficial to them selves at the same time.
    Since my retirement, I am very active in my American Legion, And The VFW.
    They help Veterans get the help they need when returning home from service.
    I find this very rewarding. I feel I am returning the favor as it could be stated
    Rader

  7. #7
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Mo. Ozarks
    Posts
    6,746
    Once I thought I had nothing to do but I was mistaken! I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO DO IT! So I did somthin' else instead! Hugs!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  8. #8
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Born in Quebec, lived most of life in small town Central Ontario.
    Posts
    335
    Rachel is probably closer to the truth.

  9. #9
    Nondressing CDer ReluctantDebutant's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    214
    Speaking as a gamer myself; war games, board games, and role playing games I know full well that there are very few GGs in that community. And TGs are probably nonexistence. I am sure if there were more GGs then that would open the way for more CDs/TGs in gaming.

    “I can't seem to relate to any of his hobbies, and I'm soooo bored. I can't seem to think of anything 'I' want to do.”

    “My role gaming planning seems ok. But I have been dwelling on how it being ME that is at the table will impact my Sunday evening gaming time with the guys.”

    Let me get this right you want to go to your gaming sessions as Lesley? But you say that Wargaming isn’t Lesley’s hobby. This gets confusing to me I can kind of get the separation of the female male personalities but it’s silly to divide out your Hobbies that way. Stop dividing yourself you Lesley/Leslie like Anime you Lesley/Leslie like Wargaming and that’s ok. If you continue to leave only the feminine things you do for Lesley then she will never be at your gaming sessions. There is nothing feminine about wargaming that isn’t to say woman can’t war game but the few that do aren’t there to express the femininity they are there to game, compete, and win. But that’s ok not everything a feminine woman has to do has to be “feminine activity” all the time. If Lesley is destine to be a fully realized person then she needs to realize that too. How is she going to express herself? Strategies and tactics don’t fall into female or male categories just good and bad one. Do you want to paint your panzers pink form you phalanxes into a heart shape? Then you probably could. I saw a guy with a Chaos Spacemarine army with a pink Hello Kitty paint scheme for Warhammer 40K. Folks thought it was funny but no one laughed AT him.

    Stop worrying about Lesley when you do Leslie things and vise a versa. Just be happy you are doing something you like and don’t worry what supposed Gender it’s supposed to fall under. It falls under what you like.

  10. #10
    Banned Read only
    Join Date
    May 2012
    Location
    Born in Quebec, lived most of life in small town Central Ontario.
    Posts
    335
    Actually the 'gaming sessions' was targeted at role gaming as opposed to table top wargaming. That might a difference in your comment.

    Tonight for instance, last session of the Rules Cyclopedia edition of the Dungeons and Dragons game (we run games as 6 session durations as turns at the chair).

    I was so happy my character Joan d'Arc a cleric didn't die on me like some of my other characters have.

    I hate it when the guys refer to my female character as he and him. Look at the frigging miniature guys, she is very definitely a girl. And it irks me as well that I get he and him. But that is understandable as I currently appear as a he and a him. I'd like that to change.

    But you make good observations.

  11. #11
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    6,640
    If your identity is mixed gender or female you need to figure out a way to "feed" your identity... Gender expression is enough for many (ie crossdressing)...but for others (especially those of us that went on to realize our dressing was just covering our ts nature), it dawns on you that you need to live..you need to actually exist as female, and clothes frankly have nothing to do with existing as a female, you can be female and wear a burlap sack...

    this may be why you are getting frustrated with your gaming as just a female character, even if that sounds attractive to you..

    this whole thing you are going through is blossoming gender dysphoria.. that part of you that is female , regardless of whether its 10%, 50%, or 100% is real, and needs to be expressed AND REFLECTED BACK AT YOU in a way that is satisfying to you as a woman or a gender queer person....

    for people that are totally guys but also like to dress, its a matter of time to dress...its literally about the dress...if for you its about your identity, you really are well served to figure out how to solve this... the feelings of gender dysphoria are not neccessarily depression, they will not respond to medicine... but they act the same way and based on only on your post, that's the feeling i have...and depression as you know can be really debilitating to your quality of life..

    As a gamer myself, it passes time...lots of anxiety and loss in my life over transition and everything i gave up... an hour of diablo3 clicking monsters to death relaxes me...if you can't get relaxation from your gaming , i hope you can find something to help!!!
    when i worked 80 hrs week to "pass the time", i still needed to feel female, and i recall letting my pinky nail grow and i shaped it nicely and i would sit in meetings staring at my hand....that's how badly i needly to feel feminine (female)...

  12. #12
    Member Chardonnay Merlot's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Connecticut, USA
    Posts
    215
    I'm with Karren here. Sometime when your bored and alone in your own thoughts is the perfect time to reconnect and redirect.

    My genders have similar interests and they seem to feed off each other quite nicely. Now there's a few things that are different.

    I'm not a huge RPG person, but I'm a serious videotaped and I've found more the few girls like me grabbing a controller and getting in the fun.I have a group of girls near me who like to get together and have a all-night daisy-chain slumber party. It's the wildest combination. Paint your nails, try on perform, look t the VS catalog in in between Rainbow Six firefights or laps at speed on F1 2011 or Burnout.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State