Ask-a-gg

[Bo-peep]

I don't mind being called GG .... only just learning all the different abbreviations but getting there slowly but surely

I haven't seen the site you mention ClosetEd ... I have only ever been here. I am sorry to hear your wife was so upset.

[Bo-peep]

Hmmmm .... just read The Founder.

how come this woman, at the beginning, states that she was so blissfully happy that New Years Eve, yet as soon as her husband reveals he likes wearing womens clothing he becomes a cocaine addict and a pervert??

Sorry ... not at all fair or reasonable

[ReineD]

Sorry ... not at all fair or reasonable

Exactly.
.......

[whowhatwhen]

Can you tell me about boobs?
I'm curious about body image issues that women would have growing up and how you felt about them.

Only recently I learned how I was affected by the stereotypical idealized bust and was worried that mine weren't correct before a member PMed me and gave me a link where I read how vastly different boobs can be and that it's normal.
(Sorry if that's not totally clear, aside from my own I have 0 experience with them.)

Are/were you affected by the idealized bust put forth by the media?

[ReineD]

Are/were you affected by the idealized bust put forth by the media?

I was a late bloomer and also tall and athletic. I did not have the curvy figure of my shorter friends. I remember noticing that boys liked big boobs and vaguely wanting to also have big boobs, but it didn't keep me awake at night since I also noticed that some boys noticed ME. On the other hand, my best friend developed early and had huge boobs. She tried as best she could to minimize them because she didn't like looking different than the other girls. Keep in mind, this was during our teenage years.

The media influenced mostly my feelings about body weight and not boobs, since most models are skinny and small breasted. I put on about 20-25 lbs in my early 20s and I felt AWFUL about myself, despite some of the weight having gone to my boobs.

So to answer your question, no I was never inordinately displeased with my breasts.

[Amelia_Barry76]

I wanted to ask about coming out to female friends & even mum's. What would be considered the better way to let them know or re-know, especially if they have any idea

[Billiebluenose1878 GG]

Just be honest and be ready and willing to answer any questions asked .... and dont be defensive either ok xxxx

[Amelia_Barry76]

Just be honest and be ready and willing to answer any questions asked .... and dont be defensive either ok xxxx

Ok, thanks for our response

[ReineD]

I wanted to ask about coming out to female friends & even mum's. What would be considered the better way to let them know or re-know, especially if they have any idea

Click on the link for good advice. It is entitled "How To Tell Your Partner", but the same principles apply no matter who you tell:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...l-your-partner

[Amelia_Barry76]

being that I'm just a casual/off & on, still in the closet dresser, what would some of the main items of clothes & lingerie should I have in my wardrobe?

[ReineD]

Amelia, you can have what suits your fancy in your closet - whatever you see around you that you like: skirts, dresses, underwear, shoes, pantyhose. For more detailed answers, I'm directing you to our "Clothing, Accessories, & Shopping Talk" section:

http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...-Shopping-Talk

[Maria S]

Dear GGs

Hello this is my first question to a GG. Where would a woman in a new area with no friends go out? Sounds a weird question but I'm stir crazy in Maria mode.

Maria

[ReineD]

If I lived in a new area, I'd go to local restaurants, I'd poke around in local shops, galleries, and bookstores. I don't do the bar scene, so if there was a coffee shop with wi-fi I'd bring my laptop and become a regular there. Presumably I'd have moved there for work, and so I'd also try to befriend people at work and ask if they wanted to do something after work. I'd also join a local gym and start exercising regularly (it's a good place to meet guys ). In the summer time, I might join a golf club and sign up for foursomes. And I'd be on the phone or on Skype with my friends a lot.

[cdtraveler]

I'm writing with a request toshare a thought or two with my Spouse. I came out to her last March. (she found this site still up on our computer). And since then she's been wonderful but feels isolated. She does speak with my gender therapist and her own counselor but I think might feel better having a place to come to where she can speak with other spouses. So was wondering if you all might share a comment or two about what this site's, what it's meant to you and how you think it might help her feel less isolated?


Thank you! AMANDA

[ReineD]

Amanda, it would take 5 minutes for your wife to set up an account here. She could introduce herself in the GG thread that's in our Intro section, and after 10 posts she could join the FAB (female at birth) private support section. And before having posted 10 times, she could ask any question that she wants in our Loved Ones section. If she does this, she will feel less isolated.

[Bo-peep]

I'm writing with a request toshare a thought or two with my Spouse. I came out to her last March. (she found this site still up on our computer). And since then she's been wonderful but feels isolated. She does speak with my gender therapist and her own counselor but I think might feel better having a place to come to where she can speak with other spouses. So was wondering if you all might share a comment or two about what this site's, what it's meant to you and how you think it might help her feel less isolated?

Hi ... I think your wife would find a great deal of support here. There are so many lovely people who are honest and who really care. I have had some lovely personal messages from people to reassure me and to give helpful advice ... your wife will be welcomed and will certainly not feel isolated anymore

[Mimi]

I'm writing with a request toshare a thought or two with my Spouse. I came out to her last March. (she found this site still up on our computer). And since then she's been wonderful but feels isolated. She does speak with my gender therapist and her own counselor but I think might feel better having a place to come to where she can speak with other spouses. So was wondering if you all might share a comment or two about what this site's, what it's meant to you and how you think it might help her feel less isolated?
Thank you! AMANDA

Eryn showed me this site shortly after she came out to me with her discovery that she wanted and needed to dress. It's been enormously helpful to me in many ways. As I read different posts, the members of this forum became real to me, with genuine worries, concerns, and love for their spouses. Some posts became jumping-off points where Eryn and I could discuss different issues. And it's always helpful for me to read what other GGs have to say, and get their many different views. I would definitely encourage your wife to set up an account and read and post so that she doesn't feel alone.

[kittypw GG]

I'm writing with a request toshare a thought or two with my Spouse. I came out to her last March. (she found this site still up on our computer). And since then she's been wonderful but feels isolated. She does speak with my gender therapist and her own counselor but I think might feel better having a place to come to where she can speak with other spouses. So was wondering if you all might share a comment or two about what this site's, what it's meant to you and how you think it might help her feel less isolated?


Thank you! AMANDA

I felt isolated also. It's not a topic you can openly discuss with people in your life. My husband (now ex) introduced me to this site. I was in the FAB for a while but I found the most help from the CD's themselves. This place has been an eye opener and helped shape my feelings about cd/tg/ts people. She will certainly feel less isolated and will make freinds. I have a few good freinds that I communicate with in real life that I met through here.

[Jenniferathome]

I have a practical question. Let's say you are wearing this dress. You are still at home. Your forget to paint your nails or some other thing that usually means you sit for several minutes. Do you sit on the chiffon skirt and wrinkle it or, do you sort of hike it up so there is no weight on the material. I hiked it up but I'm a guy.

[lynnd]

As a GG I smooth the fabric under me and sit, not hike it up.

[ReineD]

I would sit on it. I'll have to sit sometime during the evening anyway. Clothes do get wrinkled.

... I also need to add that some fabrics wrinkle more than others, as you know. If my tolerance for wrinkles is not high, I do a wrinkle test when I buy the outfit. I grab a handful of fabric in my hand in the changing room and squeeze tight for a few seconds. If the wrinkles are pronounced and don't immediately fall out (for example, some linen), I personally would not buy the outfit. But, some people don't worry about the wrinkles.

[Tibby]

Hiking it up can wrinkle it more than smoothing it out and sitting on it. I'd always go for the smooth it out and sit on it never for the hike it up. If I was going out but first had to do my nails or something like that then I wouldn't put the skirt on until afterwards. Some wrinkles are expected from natural movement and sitting.

[Maria S]

How do GGs keep high heel shoes on? I can try on ones that fit but as soon as I walk they slip like mad. I thought about heel grips but I'm doubtful that their would be enough room for them and the foot. Also when you are in a shop you can't very well say can I try them with my heel grips in.

Maria

[Tibby]

Hi Maria,

Funny you should ask this as this is actually a problem I have too and would be interested to see how other GG's resolve this I have very narrow feet so trying to find the right size shoe is fine but the width is nearly always too wide. I tried heel grips and adding gel pads (the party feet style pads) to the inside of the shoe but this didn't help much as the problem was with the width of the shoe. I now tend to go for heels with an ankle strap, the ones with a nice dainty strap that looks very much like an ankle bracelet. At least then when I walk the shoe always remains in place.

[Tamara Croft]

I'm a GG Maria, I have the same problem, I'm a size 5 1/2 (UK) and it's very rare shops sell these sizes. I did however go to tesco and get some of those clear heel grips and the ones you put inside for the heel to sit on, problem solved I didn't think they'd work that well, but they did.