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Thread: does it make you gay?

  1. #1
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    does it make you gay?

    one gay friend of mine came to know abt my crossdressing and all he wants to judge about is that I am a gay according to him .... as I love crossdressing ...

    and I think of having sex while dressing as a female and am gettting a sexual pleasure out of it ......


    is this true ?
    i dont think if u r a crossdresser u ought to be gay or a transgender ..?

  2. #2
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    There is no "ought to be gay", if you're attracted to the same sex then you're gay.
    If you're attracted to both sexes, you're bi, and if you're only attracted to the opposite sex then you're straight.

    There is no choice here, crossdressing doesn't change your orientation.
    Though, the other answer is yes, if you're a crossdresser then you're transgender.

  3. #3
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Gay guys like men.
    Maybe crossdressers or transgender women might seem like an exotic thrill, they're just simply called "tranny-chasers", theres no shortage of them, but the reality is gay guys are squarely focused on male in any form. From my measly personal observation, most gay guys seem to direct their attention to guys, stuff that looks muscular, not people dressed as women.
    Pansexual is a unique breed.
    Last edited by NathalieX66; 05-30-2012 at 10:15 PM.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by priyaverma View Post
    one gay friend of mine came to know abt my crossdressing and all he wants to judge about is that I am a gay according to him .... as I love crossdressing ...

    and I think of having sex while dressing as a female and am gettting a sexual pleasure out of it ......


    is this true ?
    i dont think if u r a crossdresser u ought to be gay or a transgender ..?
    If you're cross dressing you are transgender.

    If you're thinking about having sex with a man and you are a man pretending to be a woman... you're gay or bi (at the least, bi-curious).

    Very simple. Read the definitions lol.

  5. #5
    wishing on a star! Rebecca Star's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by priyaverma View Post
    one gay friend of mine came to know abt my crossdressing and all he wants to judge about is that I am a gay according to him
    Some people believe in the strangest things.
    I've heard some gay guys say, all CD's are gay/bi in denial. Which while this may be true for some people, it's not true for everyone.

    Personally, if this guy is a true friend he'll respect your choices and not keep harping on about this rot.
    ~ it's not how the world sees you but how you see yourself that counts ~
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebecca Star View Post
    Personally, if this guy is a true friend he'll respect your choices and not keep harping on about this rot.
    Not only that, but also realizing that they are not choices at all... but simply part of who you are. The only choice is the choice to be yourself or pretend to be someone your not.

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    darling this guy used to flirt with me being my friend ... but he is much more himself a transgender ... and i am all into girls .... and even have a sweet gf that I love the most ....

  8. #8
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rebecca Star View Post
    I've heard some gay guys say, all CD's are gay/bi in denial. Which while this may be true for some people, it's not true for everyone.
    Sometimes I want to be a woman, I like the feminine esthetic so much that I want to be it. That doesn't mean I want to jump in the hay with the next young buck I see.
    My gay friends don't even get me. Therefore, there are times I wish I was just simply a gay dude instead of being a cd/tg that likes women......it would cut down my expenses on clothes, shoes, makeup and hair removal.
    Last edited by NathalieX66; 05-30-2012 at 10:35 PM.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by priyaverma View Post

    and I think of having sex while dressing as a female and am gettting a sexual pleasure out of it ......
    Oh so your friend said this not you..

    He's using stereotypes that people use all the time. Crossdressing did not make me Bi or gay. However it makes some have Bi fantasies.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by priyaverma View Post
    darling this guy used to flirt with me being my friend ... but he is much more himself a transgender ... and i am all into girls .... and even have a sweet gf that I love the most ....
    Ah. I didn't realize that you were talking about someone else's misinformed opinion of you is what you were talking about. I thought you were just being contradictory while describing yourself. I understand now.

    As for the transgender thing... it's a VERY big umbrella term that basically means ANYONE who doesn't fit the societal norms of the binary gender roles we have created. I personally think it's odd that we lump cross dressers in with people who actually identify partly or entirely as the opposite sex... but whatever lol...

    I guess if the straightest, most macho, manly guy was named Sally by his (obviously insane and malicious) parents, he would be transgender as well...

  11. #11
    Senior Age Member sissystephanie's Avatar
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    You are only "Gay" if you want to be! If you are a male and like to have sex with other males, than you are gay or whatever! I am a male who loves to crossdress, but I have no desire to be a woman in any way and certainly not sexually!

    Bree, if a man was named Sally, that would not automatically make him a transgender! And he would probably go by the name of Sal!! Cross dressers are transgender because they wear the clothing of the opposite sex. That applies however far the CD goes with being the opposite sex!
    Stephanie

    Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by sissystephanie View Post
    Bree, if a man was named Sally, that would not automatically make him a transgender! And he would probably go by the name of Sal!! Cross dressers are transgender because they wear the clothing of the opposite sex. That applies however far the CD goes with being the opposite sex!
    I was making light of how all-encompasing the term 'transgender' is... it was a joke...

  13. #13
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    Oh.. I should add that some crossdressers are gay but are in the minority so your friend is incorrect. The act of crossdressing doesn't make you gay, as we all know.
    Last edited by Marleena; 05-30-2012 at 11:15 PM.

  14. #14
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    Being a crossdresser doesn't make one gay. Some may be, but others not. I am only into women-more to the point my wife. Never wanted or desired to be with a man.

  15. #15
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    If all crossdressers must be gay, then all gay men want to be women, therefore all gay men must be crossdressers. Right?

  16. #16
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    No, start from the beginning.

  17. #17
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sissystephanie View Post
    You are only "Gay" if you want to be!
    Did you hear that?
    It's the entire LGBT community disagreeing with you.

    I have no idea why it's so hard for straight people to get that sexual orientation is not a choice.

  18. #18
    Member Lyndaloves's Avatar
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    If a crossdresser dresses as a woman but has no interest in a male relationship he is straight.
    He may have gay fantasies but unless acted upon he is still straight.
    If he experiments with a male partner and finds its not really his cup of tea then IMO he be Bi curious.
    If he wants a male or female partners then he'd be Bi.
    And if he only wanted a male partner he would be gay.

    Lynda

  19. #19
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Here's a question for your gay friend, Priya.

    He assumes you're gay because u dress up. If that were true and he's gay, why doesn't HE dress up in women's things, then?

    Sounds a lot like he's hoping to turn u!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  20. #20
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    Gay? Hell no I'm downright miserable.

    What? oh it's just someone being uneducated and/or biased. Now I got ya.

    Remember people, being wrong and/or stupid is not limited to boring normal straights. Everyone gets a chance to qualify

  21. #21
    Senior Member KellyJameson's Avatar
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    He is trying to seduce you by convincing you that you are gay.

    This is not a friend!

    Most who crossdress are heterosexual.

  22. #22
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    I would have to say be happy with yourself and try not to put too much weight on what others think of you. For me personally I was very afraid of what people would think of me if they ever found out i liked to wear women's clothing. However, after telling my best friend, a GG, and then a gay friend, both were more than willing to accept me for who I was and I stopped caring about what other people would say.

    And yes crossdressers tend to be lumped into the whole LGBT umbrella, but at the same time we all have our own definitions. We are "individuals" and yet people tend to classify every one into categories. Groups that we form ourselves are fine it just these so called "social norms/classifications" that I tend to have a problem with, but that me

    Again, be yourself and try not to think too much about what others may think.

  23. #23
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by priyaverma View Post
    one gay friend of mine came to know abt my crossdressing and all he wants to judge about is that I am a gay according to him .... as I love crossdressing ...

    and I think of having sex while dressing as a female and am gettting a sexual pleasure out of it ......


    is this true ?
    i dont think if u r a crossdresser u ought to be gay or a transgender ..?
    Welcome, priyaverma.

    Gender identity is separate from sexual attraction. There are male crossdressers and transsexuals, and non-crossdressing men who are attracted to only women, only men, both, or nobody (asexuals).

    You will know if your attraction to men is more than a wish to enhance your feminine feelings, once you actually go out there and try it. If the experience of being one half of two male-bodied individuals having sex is pleasant to you, then you will know that you are same-sex attracted. If you are also attracted to women, then you will know that you are bi.

    Oh, and 'transgender' is an umbrella term that applies to a wide variety of individuals who express cross-gender feelings, including crossdressers and transsexuals.

    Edit - As to being bi-curious, honestly I wouldn't be able to stand not knowing. lol. I'd go out there and try it to see how it fit, and then I'd have my answer. I suppose there are those who like to fantasize and who don't want to try it, but then I guess the answer for these individuals is they are not bi, they just enjoy the fantasy. It's a subtle difference, but an important one.
    Last edited by ReineD; 05-31-2012 at 12:16 AM.
    Reine

  24. #24
    Weirdest woman ever! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
    Welcome, priyaverma. -----------------------------
    Edit - As to being bi-curious, honestly I wouldn't be able to stand not knowing. lol. I'd go out there and try it to see how it fit, and then I'd have my answer. I suppose there are those who like to fantasize and who don't want to try it, but then I guess the answer for these individuals is they are not bi, they just enjoy the fantasy. It's a subtle difference, but an important one.
    Excellent advice, Reine! Which is why I came up with the "Doc's toe test". It works on all sexes, genders, and individuals for ME! Here it is:

    I'm NOT a foot person! However, when I'm excited about a person, toe kissing WOULD be acceptable! To find out if I'm REALLY attracted to someone, I only have imagine us kissing, etc. each other's toes! If I'm good with that, alrite, move ahead! If not? I'm OUT! As yet, I've never seen a male that has passed this test! And, these days, most of my GG dates don't! Sigh!

    Priya, or ANYONE, u can take this test yourself. And, not have to physically try someone in bed to know u aren't into them! Pick some other body part that u find icky if you're a foot person and imagine that instead!
    You're welcome!
    Last edited by ReineD; 05-31-2012 at 12:21 AM. Reason: You grabbed my quote while I was editing, so I've just edited the quote to match my post. :p
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  25. #25
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    The clothes only serve to facilitate bringing out the feelings that are already inside Hon.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

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