Post Office, problem

[JoanAz]

I normally wear Short Shorts / Speedo type around the house with a LONG T-Shirt over them that comes down well below the bottom of the Sorts.
I have met the Postal mail deliverer (Female) several time to pick up a package at the front door.
For the last 10 days I have been getting Mail Notice "sorry we missed you"
then I have to drive down to the Post Office to pick up the package.
On day 8 I asked the driver about missing the delivery. She said postmaster says not to deliver to my Front Door.
On day 10 I knew a package was arriving (tracking #) and waited for the delivery. She came to the mail box, dropped mail and left, there was a Sorry we Missed you notice.
I jumped in my car and caught up to her and asked for the Package.
I was infromed it is in the Post Office.
To cut post short, speaking to Postmaster she complainde about how i was "Dressed" when she met me at the Door...

Does this contritute Sexual harasment?
Coments welcome.
Nothing was indecent or showing in all the meetings>
((HUGGS)))

[Renee W]

As long as you were answering the door properly dressed, whether it be in male clothes or female clothes, don't see any grounds for them to refuse delivery when door service is required.

I would speak to the postmaster again and ask if they would go on record as to the reason and then start working your way up hill. Everyone has a boss to report to and all you have to do is find the right one and watch it flow downhill from there.

[Shelly Preston]

I dont know about sexual harrassment but it does seem excessive.

You have not even been given the chance to explain you were not dressed in an indecent manner. I assume the postwoman thought you were not wearing shorts.

I think you deserve a full explanation.

[BRANDYJ]

I don't think you have a case for sexual harassment. It appears that the female postal worker for whatever reason was uncomfortable with your manor of dress at the door. She might have felt the way you were dressed was a sexual come on to her and advised the Post Master that she felt sexually harassed by your lack of cover answering the door. There might have been an exchange of words that made her feel concerned. From your description of how you were dressed and the fact that you had met this same female postal worker at the door in the past why now is she uncomfortable making a delivery unless there were some words exchanged, or in the past you were covered better then the way you describe. But sexual harassment? Not a chance.

[Annie D]

The first thing that came to my mind was because your shirt is so much longer than the type of shorts you were wearing, she thought that you were not wearing anything under the shirt and would "flash" her. To tell you the truth, if my wife or my daughter was your mail carrier, I would advise them to avoid going to your door as well. I don't know what the law is about if someone is inside their house/apartment and flashes someone else standing at the doorway or doorstep because it could be a "my word against yours" situation but why take the chance. It doesn't sound like harrassment but it could be considered "sexually deviant" on your part. Not that you ever intended it to be anything except being comfortable in your own home but it sounds to me that you have "mis-stepped" in the way you were dressed and now have to live with it.

[Melissa Rose]

It is not sexual harassment based on standard definitions. It could be twisted into a form of discrimination depending on how she articulated her complaint, but she would have to be totally ignorant of common policies or foolish to have justified her reasons in that way. If the postal carrier for some reasons feels unsafe, mail delivery to a house can be denied; however, uncomfortable and unsafe are not the same thing. If it is a case of only being uncomfortable then door delivery should resume. If the postal carrier can make a good case of it being about safety or feeling threatened by your behavior then you may have to pick up packages at the post office in the future. As others have said, she may have thought you had nothing on under the shirt and/or something about your demeanor set off warning bells in her head.

[kimdl93]

Evidently the way you met her at the door was a problem for her. I don't know believe it was harrassment - if you were covered up as you described. Still, if I were you I wouldn't make it a habit of meeting the postal carrier at the door dressed in such a manner. If it happened once, its just a happenstance. If it happens repeatedly, I guess she might consider something more than chance.

[Marleena]

Not sexual harassment, but possibly discrimination. It is not against the law to be dressed as you please as long as you are not considered indecent or exposed. No laws are on the books about being dressed in woman's clothes. You letter carrier is being ridiculous as far as I'm concerned.

[Flent]

The first thing that came to my mind was because your shirt is so much longer than the type of shorts you were wearing, she thought that you were not wearing anything under the shirt and would "flash" her. To tell you the truth, if my wife or my daughter was your mail carrier, I would advise them to avoid going to your door as well. I don't know what the law is about if someone is inside their house/apartment and flashes someone else standing at the doorway or doorstep because it could be a "my word against yours" situation but why take the chance. It doesn't sound like harrassment but it could be considered "sexually deviant" on your part. Not that you ever intended it to be anything except being comfortable in your own home but it sounds to me that you have "mis-stepped" in the way you were dressed and now have to live with it.

This. It probably looked like you had nothing on down there, and it's just a misunderstanding. It would probably make me feel uncomfortable too if that's the impression I had.

[Karren H]

Right or wrong.... Since you are part of her work environment... Her not feeling comfortable around you... Giver her every right to file a complaint with her boss..... Imho.

[JoanAz]

I gave her a letter of apology, also a copy to her supervisor.

Dear Post man/women:

I have to apologize to you for having inadvertently offended you with my manner of dress.
I like to wear “short shorts” , sometimes the Long T-shirts extend beyond the bottom of the shorts.
If when you are delivering a package & I happen to be wearing shorts, I will stay behind my front door.
If you have a complaint on delivering anything to my home please let me know, (I will not be offended)
J*** F***
(ADDRESS)
PS I have always enjoyed the short conversation with you when receiving a delivery

THE SHORT CONVERSATION is how's the Weather treating you, have a Good Day, drive carefully, etc.

[UNDERDRESSER]

I gave her a letter of apology, also a copy to her supervisor.

Dear Post man/women:

I have to apologize to you for having inadvertently offended you with my manner of dress.
I like to wear “short shorts” , sometimes the Long T-shirts extend beyond the bottom of the shorts.
If when you are delivering a package & I happen to be wearing shorts, I will stay behind my front door.
If you have a complaint on delivering anything to my home please let me know, (I will not be offended)
J*** F***
(ADDRESS)
PS I have always enjoyed the short conversation with you when receiving a delivery

THE SHORT CONVERSATION is how's the Weather treating you, have a Good Day, drive carefully, etc.

Maybe that will help.

Without seeing how you were dressed, i can't say whether she had any particular reason to be offended or fearful. I have met my postwoman in a dressing gown, ( male ) and more often, brief running shorts and t-shirt. The shorts show a LOT of shaved leg, but there is no way I can get a t-shirt long enough to drop below the bottom of the shorts, so it's clear I am wearing shorts. She hasn't seemed to be bothered by it.

[Trish]

Maybe, with the shirt comming below the shorts, it looks as you had no pants on. That is what I picture by your discription.

[DeeArel]

My SO used to work for USPS. They do not have to deliver if they feel uncomfortable.

[Kate Simmons]

The bottom line is you cannot "make" someone do something they don't want to do. The carrier can exercise her preference without tampering with the mail by leaving the notice. I get many packages from different companies and it's quite obvious they are female items and I also have a female mail route person. She has never complained but then again, I have never gotten the packages from her en femme either. That may change soon though.

[Rachel Morley]

It's one of those "rules" ... you know, restaurants don't have to seat you, bars don't have to serve you and mail companies don't have to deliver to you. As others have said I think she thought you had either nothing on at all under your tee, or for sure she thought you were not wearing shorts. I can see how she might think that. You were in boy mode right? - I bet she saw you were a guy, and in her mind, guys don't wear short shorts, and so she just assumed you can't be wearing anything and she felt uncomfortable.

Your letter might help, but IMO it all depends on what sort of a person she is

[linda allen]

The bottom line is you cannot "make" someone do something they don't want to do.

In many, if not most cases, an employer can "make" an employee do something they may not want to do as long as it's part of their job description and not unsafe. For example a janitor can be "made" to empty the garbage cans. Delivering packages to recipients is part of a postal worker's job description.

It's unfortunate that in this case, the female delivery person seems to be afraid of the OP for some reason and the postmaster has chosen to back her up. Personally, I think this is unreasonable. A person going door to door delivering things should expect to see "strange" behavior from time to time. It's part of the job.

If I were the OP, I would not have raced after the postal worker and stopped her, that only gave her more reson to fear the OP. I would have complained in writing to the postmaster about my packages not being delivered and demanded a response (in writing). After receiving the response, I would have challenged it, demanded that my packages be delivered to my door in the future, and copied my elected representatives in the US Congress on all correspondence.

[BobbieBrooks]

neither rain nor shorts. Sorry snow. will keep the mail from being delivered. LOL I would show the postmaster what was worn, and go from there. In AZ seems that with the heat there, what was being worn should not be a problem. Would suggest also what Linda as said. I think SHE has the problem and showing the postmaster what was worn might end the problem. I would march into the post office and show them, wearing the same outfit.

BobbieB

[Sara Jessica]

I have to side with the mail carrier. Her perception is her reality, that she is going to the door where a guy appears to be running around in a long t-shirt, perhaps with no underwear. It's creepy to her and she exercised her right not to be creeped-out on the job. The only thing the Postal Service could have done better is to communicate at the beginning as to the change in mail delivery and the reason why.

[sometimes_miss]

I'm going to try not to read too much into this; but for whatever reason, the woman delivering the package seems to be very uncomfortable with the concept of you in female clothing. Perhaps she was assaulted by some guy who was dressed like a female when she was young; most people who were molested never tell anyone. It's a big world, and all kinds of possibilities. Maybe let her know it's o.k. to leave the package on the front step; my ups guy used to leave the dreaded 'missed you' slip; then I explained, he gave me a few and I just sign them in advance, stick it on the inside of the storm window and he leaves it inside my storm door. Maybe she can do that. Most people are flexible; works something out where both of you can be comfortable with the situation.

[Stephanie47]

I did not see anywhere in the thread where the OP was stating he was wearing female attire. Not knowing the history of the female letter carrier, we really do not know her past experiences. She very well could have encountered 'flashers' on her route.

If I were a letter carrier and a young woman answered the door dressed in the same manner, I would not have complained.

[RiverdanceGirl]

Is it really logical to assume that somebody wearing a long t-shirt must be naked underneath and therefore a pervert? That certainly would not be my assumption. Perhaps that person was on their way to the backyard pool when the doorbell rang. Not everybody swims in knee shorts. Definitely if I saw shaved legs I'd think 'competitive swimmer' and not 'potential flasher'. Chasing after her was probably not the best idea though. But seriously, is this the kind of world we live in that we interact harmlessly with a person and then report them to our boss as being possibly dangerous? Sure if the OP was accidentally on purpose letting the t-shirt ride up to expose nakkie genitalia then yes, but that didn't happen. I worked in retail for many years and if I had refused to serve a customer, or treated them differently on the grounds that I had no proof thay were wearing underwear I would have been dismissed on the spot.

[Mistybtm]

I really think that the postal woman should have not complained you did nothing wrong you should not have to be restricted the way you dress in your own home to receive a package that you paid to have shipped to you. When I here SH## like this it realy pisses me off sounds like the postal working is being lazzy and just wants an easy way out

[Sometimes Steffi]

It's one of those "rules" ... you know, restaurants don't have to seat you, bars don't have to serve you and mail companies don't have to deliver to you.(

I don't want to hijack this thread, and I am not a lawyer, but restaurants do need to seat your and bars do need to serve you (if you're over the drinking age and not obviously intoxicated). I think it's called the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and restaurants and bars are "public accomodations".

[GaleWarning]

I don't want to hijack this thread, and I am not a lawyer, but restaurants do need to seat your and bars do need to serve you (if you're over the drinking age and not obviously intoxicated). I think it's called the Civil Rights Act of 1964, and restaurants and bars are "public accomodations".

Here in NZ bars and restaurants can disbar a customer if s/he is inappropriately dressed. They must display a notice which reads, "Right of Admission Reserved". It also covers intoxication etc.

Apropos the topic, I side with the postal worker.