What Does Soceity (in general) Have to Fear About Transgenderism?

[Rebecca Star]

Hi All,

After pursuing a couple of other threads, it got me thinking (always a good thing), to how the general population thinks toward Transgenderism. Taking refuge under the Transgender umbrella myself, I obviously hold empathy to our plight for acceptance.

If I can transgress for a moment. I stated on another thread, it seems; least that's how I was raised, from an early age most of us are programmed (brain washed) to believe we must pigeon hole people. And anyone who does not conform to within accepted boundaries laid out within society, these people, most times are ridiculed, mocked and generally become the butt of jokes etc...etc.

However if I slice and dice that type of doctrine up, it inevitably returns to keeping people in check, controlled. Which then fundamentally points back to a fear of something happening, if these mechanisms of labelling people are not in place or action.

While I'll admit I'm guilty of judging the cover and not the book, I've tried to become mindful of when this happens and stop that mindset in its tracks.

Ultimately though, and given my thread topic, is it the fear of the unknown which the general population hold issue to anything out of the ordinary or is it something completely different?

[AngelaKelly<3]

I think it generally is fear of the unknown that causes people to be unwilling to accept transgendered people. Anything different, or anything people don't fully understand, is scary to a lot of people. I think we definitely need to get a lot more people involved in educating our young people in LGBT issues. First step in stamping out things like Transphobia x

[Foxglove]

They don't have anything to fear from us. Perhaps they think they do. I'm not sure that hostile reactions to us are generated by fear, though. It could be something else entirely. Dislike of what's different, e.g.

Annabelle

[Kate Simmons]

I dunno Hon, I think part of it may be that they fear that we have the guts to actually explore feelings that they, themselves, may have and are afraid of. How can anything be wrong if pure love is involved? In any case they have much more to fear from the Reticulan Empire than they do from TG people.

[Rachel Morley]

And anyone who does not conform to within accepted boundaries laid out within society, these people, most times are ridiculed, mocked and generally become the butt of jokes etc...etc. However if I slice and dice that type of doctrine up, it inevitably returns to keeping people in check, controlled. Which then fundamentally points back to a fear of something happening, if these mechanisms of labelling people are not in place or action.

This is the way of the world. From little kids poking fun at other little kids to leaders of nations rejecting people because they think differently than the "rulers". It will never change.

Ultimately though, and given my thread topic, is it the fear of the unknown which the general population hold issue to anything out of the ordinary or is it something completely different?

I believe it is fear of the unknown and/or outright discrimination based on people's social upbringing or religious beliefs etc. Until people themselves start to think differently about their fellow man and woman I don't see it changing anytime soon

[Nigella]

Before this question can be answered ask yourself, what do you have to fear from society.

[Lynn Marie]

[SIZE="4"]We are all programmed from the inside out to be wary of the unusual. It's just a natural instinct of being part of the food chain. If you've ever lived in a neighborhood for a few years, you get to know who belongs there and who doesn't. You watch those who you don't know, and especially those who don't fit the norm. It's human nature.

If you don't want to conform, you're going to make your life a little more difficult. If you are willing to accept that, then go for it. I'd much rather conform for the most part and keep my life simple so I can spend more time and effort on my hobbies like crossdressing! Pick you battles and make sure you will win.[/SIZE]

[Sandra1746]

Many people have the tendency to elevate themselves at the expense of others. Just look at things like the eugenics movement for "societal confirmation" of this concept. Those that disparage TG, CD, gay, or others (including the handicapped) are elevating themselves at another's expense.

Everybody is unique and everybody deserves respect. We are all equal and equally valuable.

Just my $0.02,
Sandra1746

[Sarah Doepner]

I don't think we will know what "society in general" has to fear from the TG community until the stereotypes and inaccurate associations they have with us are put to rest. Right now they are afraid of all sorts of things that are real, just none of them have to do with crossdressers. It will take a while to parse it all out and see what the real concerns are. Probably we will find that it's all about how difficult it is for some folks to accept those of us who are different in obvious ways.

As long as I don't present myself in girl mode or talk about things that make them uncomfortable I have a lot of people who think I'm just a little odd. I do believe that If I were to come out, the number would drop by about 90%. Maybe I'm wrong and I would hope that I am, but I'm not ready to give it a try until my wife is comfortable with that kind of disclosure. It probably won't happen soon.

[Marleena]

Fear of the unknown, and stereotyping by the media and other sources come to mind first Rebecca. When we are read we can sometimes tell by their reaction. Other times we wonder WTH are they really thinking. The biggest changes can come through educating the masses and the girls that mingle and answer questions while out and about. Most people are afraid or too disturbed to approach us though, so wear a big smile.

[flatlander_48]

Ultimately though, and given my thread topic, is it the fear of the unknown which the general population hold issue to anything out of the ordinary or is it something completely different?

Yes, fear of things we don't understand is very human, so that's the first part of it. Transgenderism challenges our notions of male and female. We confuse sex and gender and our thinking is in binary terms. Other variations don't fit it. That's the second part. The third part is that we, as humans, don't do very well with difference. We don't appreciate and embrace difference. Rather, we often use it as a means to discriminate and separate. Instead, we cling to the Zero Sum Game notion. In other words, the thought process is something like:

If people value you, they cannot value me.
If you have something, it means that I cannot.
If you have a right, that means that I do not.

Not to drag in another topic, but the Zero Sum Game comes into the controversy over gay marriage. People claim that allowing gays to marry will lessen heterosexual marriages. Going back in history, allowing blacks to have rights lessened the rights that whites had. Clearly it doesn't work like that, but it the thought process that people often have whether they admit it or not. So, the idea of difference is used as the basis for forming a number of counterproductive thoughts.

[Rebecca Star]

Before this question can be answered ask yourself, what do you have to fear from society.

Certainly apt and aligned to the philosophy of Confucius. That does give me some food for thought.

[KellyJameson]

The fear is similar to Xenophobia and is defined as an intense or irrational dislike or fear of people from other countries or as an unreasonable fear or hatred of foreigners or strangers or of that which is foreign or strange.

It is a primal and ancient response that we all carry

If each of us works toward being strange (unique) we will than expand our world by expanding the world of others and move beyond the instictual fears that imprison us.

[Shananigans]

It's not so much that society is "afraid," at least not a fear in the sense that we usuay think about fear. People are evolved to be wary of anyone that looks and acts different from their "tribe." It kept us alive. It proves useful to our survival, so we kept the trait with us even to today. You also have to realize that people make judgements and understand their environment through visual cues. This is why smiling we understand what it means when someone smiles or frowns. We also make judgements about gender, social class, hobbies, interests, etc. from visual cues. Most of the time, we don't even realize that we are doing it. It's instinct. It is a popular trope in TG fiction, TG reality, comedies, dramas, and whatever else that some guy is fooled by a TG woman until he gets to the bedroom. In the Crying Game, the guy spent a few minutes puking after the truth was revealed. Ace Ventura brought back this same scene. In the video game Dragon Age 2, the only TG person is a hooker...who reveals something extra in the bedroom and talks in a husky male voice. So, the popular image is of deception and low social standing (hookers). But, I think what really bothers people is the idea of being deceived from the visual cues that have been in place for thousands of years to survive. People don't like deception at all as a rule. So, even if most TG people do not "pass," the idea is that there is deception that could be involved...or, maybe, that they are Trying to deceive.

This is my theory if why it makes a lot of people uncomfortable.

It gets sticky, because I don't think anyone should have to walk up to anyone else and identify their chromosomes upon meeting. But, just growing up as a girl, there's tons of precautions that I was just brought up with that protect me from violence from men. It might not be "fair" for me, but it's hard for me to fathom myself not taking certain precaution...it's just how I have been living for 24 years. A lot of violence on TG people happens when someone is "deceived," and the argument is that TG people shouldn't have to always put it out there. But, just being a girl and just living in the world, I know there are things that I have to do Because I am a girl that my not exactly be "fair or equal" to me. But, it keeps me safe. So, realize that people don't like deception and that men can be very dangerous. You should never trust someone you don't know, especially not someone bigger than you. The "air needs to be cleared" before anything intimate occurs. No, it might not be fair...but, it's part of the job description. GGs didn't exactly sign up for it or choose it either, but we learn.

So, anyway, those are my thoughts on fear of TG people...with a side note on protecting yourselves from that fear.

[sissystephanie]

Most of the "fear" of CD'ing or Transphobia that supposedly resides in the general public actually resides within the CD's themselves. If you really read the posts on this forum, it is quite obvious that is true. The general public does not fear us, because for the most part they don't even know who we are, nor do they care! There may be some areas of the world where that doesn't apply, but they are few and far between!

Learn to live your own life, and apart from your own family, don't worry about how the rest of the world thinks!

[STACY B]

Fear not ,,, Im just a man in a dress ,,,lol,,,, The only time we should be feared is when the last size 12 platforms on sale ,,,, Look outtttttt ,,,, Fat Lady coming threw ,,,,,, (Im a MAN Ya know ) ,,,,,, Settle down folks there is nothing to see here ! Got um,,,,,, Click,,,Clack,,,,,,Click,,,,Clack,,,, Thats me walking away ,,, No one was hurt in this Dramatzation of this story all suspects are inocent until proven guilty in a court of Law ,,,lol,,,,,,

[flatlander_48]

Learn to live your own life, and apart from your own family, don't worry about how the rest of the world thinks!

No problem with what you said, but remember this. We live in the World along with all sorts of other people. It is helpful to have some understanding of what's going on for people. Being oblivious to it may not be the most useful thing to do. Note that awareness and worry are 2 different things...

[Billiebluenose1878 GG]

Sadly ..this world is not tolerant and respectful of anyone ... and i think that if we was taught at school from the age of 11 about transgenderism and how diverse we humans are then it would be a step forward into a better society where everyone is seen as equals ..... xxxxx

[Chickhe]

Nothing! What you need to get over is believing that they do! I think there is a lot of truth to the saying 'you make your own bed and you have to sleep in it'. I think you have to walk and talk like you are part of the world and you will fit in as part of it.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Rebecca, They are probably afraid of what they don't understand.

[Contessa]

Flatlander

It sounds like to me you get it. Your comment about heterssexual marriage and gay marriage and blacks is right on the mark. Most marriages end in divorce anyway. About 50% I think. I remember a friend or co service member/worker explained that "why did they give you guys a whole month to be recognized" I told him hey you guys have the other eleven. I wasn't trying to be insinuative but how do you have people understand. We are all in the same boat, On the same earth unless anyone knows where the jumping off point is. Life is too short.

Tess

[Marleena]

My answer to society is that they have nothing to fear! We are all normal productive members of society. In fact if they took the time to know us they'd find out we are harmless and kind of cool too!

[Shananigans]

This quote comes from one of my very favorite books. It's called East of Eden, and it's by Steinbeck. I thought it might be relevant here.

“After a while you'll think no thought the others do not think. You'll know no word the others can't say. And you'll do things because the others do them. You'll feel the danger in any difference whatever-a danger to the crowd of like-thinking, like-acting men...Once in a while there is a man who won't do what is demanded of him, and do you know what happens? The whole machine devotes itself coldly to the destruction of his difference. They'll beat your spirit and your nerves, your body and your mind, with iron rods until the dangerous difference goes out of you. And if you can't finally give in, they'll vomit you up and leave you stinking outside--neither part of themselves, nor yet free...They only do it to protect themselves. A thing so triumphantly illogical, so beautifully senseless as an army can't allow a question to weaken it.”

Food for thought.

[Wildaboutheels]

In essence, most people operate on the principle that "Ignorance is bliss". They just don't care or need to know about certain things.

As long as those "things" don't affect THEM in any way, shape or form.

Blame EVOLUTION which programs us all HOW to look for potential mates. We just "know" deep inside [our basic programming] that if one has external plumbing they are men and should dress and act like men. Men [most of the CDers] just should not wear any articles of clothing designed to "trick or deceive" other people into thinking they are females. That "must" be wrong. There must be something wrong with that person. We should not have to work at figuring out if other Humans are possible mates. Mates as in having sex and making babies - continuation of the species.

Same thinking applies to gays for most people I think. They SHOULD just like the opposite sex like most "normal" people. There "must be" something wrong with them.

UNTIL people find out one of THEIR friends is gay. Or a CDer. Maybe even one of THEIR kids. Then and ONLY then will most people bother to make the effort to understand that some of us are different. Make the effort to do some research and reach their own conclusion/s. Of course many people seem incapable of making up their own minds. Or, just as likely, they don't want to rock the boat and risk possibly being ostracized themselves for sticking up for CDers or gays or Blacks or... The list is limitless.

Shan obviously "gets it".

We ARE animals and we DON'T have full contol over all our different thought processes, some of which we might not be consciously aware of. Some of them are simply trying to "protect" us or help us make better choices for our species.

[Rebecca Star]

Blame EVOLUTION which programs us all HOW to look for potential mates. We just "know" deep inside [our basic programming] that if one has external plumbing they are men and should dress and act like men. Men [most of the CDers] just should not wear any articles of clothing designed to "trick or deceive" other people into thinking they are females. That "must" be wrong. There must be something wrong with that person. We should not have to work at figuring out if other Humans are possible mates. Mates as in having sex and making babies - continuation of the species.

Same thinking applies to gays for most people I think. They SHOULD just like the opposite sex like most "normal" people. There "must be" something wrong with them.

UNTIL people find out one of THEIR friends is gay. Or a CDer. Maybe even one of THEIR kids. Then and ONLY then will most people bother to make the effort to understand that some of us are different. Make the effort to do some research and reach their own conclusion/s. Of course many people seem incapable of making up their own minds. Or, just as likely, they don't want to rock the boat and risk possibly being ostracized themselves for sticking up for CDers or gays or Blacks or... The list is limitless.

Essentially I'm an optimist, I like to think there is good in everyone and a Leopard can change its spots too.

However, the points you raise on "evolution", I've never really given much thought to. Yet strangely enough, what you've said makes a hell of a lot of sense. Further more, I agree not too many people will dig deeper into a subject, unless that topic has a direct impact on, or in some way, is affecting the yin or yang of their status quo.

Maybe this is yet another small part of the 90% of our brain which is claimed we don't consciously use. But, which continues to profoundly and subconsciously influence our choices, on a daily basis.