bridalboy: crossdressing is like lace poetry: in his elegy "In Memory of W.B. Yeats." W.H. Auden addresses the ghost of Yeats, "Mad Ireland hurt you into poetry"
Just as one can be hurt into poetry, can you , in thinking back on your life, remember what specifically hurt you into crossdressing? And if you cannot truly identify
and address any hurt, then rest in the comfort, your not a crossdresser. I wish panties and a nighty was all my Chase statement had to account for...lol, dana
... more than the type of item worn.
If you wear these things strictly for having sex (sexual expression and release) and you want them off when you're done, then it is an object fetish or a kink. It is not CDing, any more than having a thing for latex, or bondage, or having a foot fetish.Originally Posted by BridalBoy
If you feel a sort of calmness or "rightness" or psychological relief when you wear these things, you most definitely are CDing. In my opinion. There are many subconscious barriers that keep CDers from fully dressing; one of them is a fear of rejection for example. If you are subconsciously experiencing barriers (and you would have to be very honest with yourself to figure it all out), then this would make you no less of a CDer than someone who has overcome their barriers and dresses fully. You say that you wear the nightie every night and this might be an indication that you are receiving a psychological benefit.
Men who do not CDress have no desire to wear women's clothing, unless it is for fetish or kink as described in the first paragraph.
If you experience both the sexual aspect and the psychological benefit, then you are CDing. Many of the CDers here say that it was sexual for them in the beginning, but it evolved.
Also, we have members who wear feminine clothing that no one notices, such as blue jeans, polo shirts, sneakers purchased in women's stores that look very similar to men's. These members do not appear to be CDing, they are presenting as men, but they are CDing, since they purposely buy clothing from women's stores in order to feel better about themselves, even if no one notices.
Last edited by ReineD; 07-31-2012 at 04:51 PM.
Reine
If a man puts on any article of clothes meant for women, and he only did it once for whatever reason, he engaged in a one time act of crossdressing. If a man continues to wear any article of clothing, repeatedly, for whatever reason, then he can be called a crossdresser. One act of wearing women's clothes does not mean the man is a CD. It's the repeated act over time, even years that then makes him a crossdresser. In my opinion, the OP's reason for wearing panties and a nightie to bed every night, even if for pure sexual fetish reasons, is still a "true"(OP's adjective) crossdresser, because it's true, he is wearing women's clothes every night. The reason has nothing to do with whether or not a man would be considered a cross dresser. Of course we all might consider a different meaning of exactly what a "true"crossdresser is. For me, if I add the word "true" to crossdresser, then I tend to think of the majority of us that not only wear the clothes... crossdress, in it's purest meaning of the word, are only true crossdressers if we also wear the makeup, the wig, the shoes and present as women. To me, a guy that wears female clothes, maybe has a beard or mustache, and never puts on the makeup, wig and presents as a completely female image, is not what "true" crossdresser is. Like I said, that's my definition of the term True + crossdresser. Opinions will vary for sure. Take away the word "true" and mileage will vary even more.
^this; basically the term means wearing the clothes generally worn by the opposite sex exclusively. For example, wearing work boots wouldn't qualify, if they were of a type that could be identified as being worn by either sex. Or, say, a fedora. Now, a pink fedora with a feather sticking out of it, perhaps that would be another story!
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
SometimesMiss, what about construction boots?
A member once asked where she could find construction boots in large enough women's sizes for work. I gave her links to a site where they had both men's and womens, they looked identical to me, but the men's were less expensive. I asked her why it was so important to buy the women's boots. She said it was because it made her feel better. (I gather she also wore women's coveralls).
She was crossdressing. It's the intent .. the feeling that you are wearing an item of women's clothing no matter what it looks like and it makes you feel better, BECAUSE it comes from a women's store. If a man is not a CDer and he needs a pair of construction boots, he won't go out of his way to wear women's. And, if the last pair of boots on the market is a pair of women's size 15, he'll buy them reluctantly perpaps, but he'll buy them just the same and it won't give him any psychological benefit to wear them like it does a CDer.
Reine
How long do I need to keep on my wig, makeup, clothes, shoes, pantyhose, jewelry, perfume, etc... in order to stay under the TG umbrella?
Hi Bridalboy
I agree totally with Reine's comments. If your avatar is you and you enjoy the sensation of being a bride then yes, you are a CD welcome to the club.
Jane
Clinically speaking, yes. From what you describe you practice some degree of transvestism as clinicians define it.
Yes you do - so why ask the question?
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC][SIZE="3"]To be a Rock and not to Roll[/SIZE]
What do YOU think? You are asking us whether you are a CDer or not. You seem to infer that you believe you may be. Obviously, you think you are something, or you would not have taken the time to join this forum, and compose and submit a thread asking this question. Moreover, I note that you have been a member since 2009, so you have been here and stuck around for a while.
But even beyond what you may think you are, how does it make you feel? There ain't nothing wrong with crossdressing. It can be a beautiful, magical, magnificent endeavor. Much pleasure, joy, and meaning can be derived from dressing as a member of the opposite gender. Much courage can be found within one's self for taking those initial difficult steps in being true to whoever you may be on the inside.
So what do you think? Are you a crossdresser? Are you ok with yourself if your believe you are? If so, welcome to your life, enjoy, and just be yourself!
We all start somewhere, for me it has persisted with some changes over 60 years. I have a lifetime monogamous partner who is accepting but not enthusiastic or innovative, qualities that might have changed some where I am today.
I started as a pre-teen nude and tucking to look like my mom down there while wearing her open bottomed girdle while she was shopping and I was supposed to be reading.
After a long hiatus I eventually confided in my wife how much I had enjoyed that youthful summer. She was receptive bless her to the tucking and dressing but never really got into playing the male role for intercourse other than as a special treat for me.
She is a great shopper and we do enjoy picking out matching panties and other clothing for both of us and she is my Photographer.
Good luck Bridal Boy, it sounds like you too a blessed with a good girlfriend.
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