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Thread: For those that are single

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member StephanieT's Avatar
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    For those that are single

    Have you found females that are accepting? I am so afraid I will die alone and lonely.

  2. #2
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Mainly only a few, and they are married! There simply are not that many who would want to marry a man who dresses in womens clothes. They may like us as nice friends, but, lifetime commitment is another thing. They are very rare, about as rare as Dodo birds. The lonliness sucks, alright. I am 58, never married, and getting to the point, where i realistically don't see myself married, in this life. It is not impossible to find a lady who accepts dressing, but, not that easy to find her.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  3. #3
    Silver Member BRANDYJ's Avatar
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    Stephanie, I have been very fortunate to have been married to two women that accepted my crossdressing. My first accepting wife died after 20 good years together. My second wife and I were together for almost 19 years. Divorced for reasons not related to crossdressing at all. Today, she is still a friend. My present SO is also very accepting and it's never been an issue.
    When I see posts like yours, it makes me wonder..... What's more important to you, the dressing or sharing love with a partner? For me, it's always been more important to have an SO or wife in my life. Once I'd meet someone and can see that the chemistry is right and the relationship is headed for long term or marriage, then and only then worry about her accepting only after the compatibility and a chance for long lasting love is a real possibility. I think those that make the focus on finding an accepting woman are shooting themselves in the foot. Focus o finding love first, then worry about the private things about yourself that you will want to share with her, just as she is at that stage to share private things about herself and past.
    it's true, the average woman does not want a man in a dress as pointed out above, but once trust and respect is in place along with her having strong feelings for you, many women can adjust and learn to accept it. I have about a dozen GG friends that know my fem side. With only a few exceptions, each one said that if they found out a guy they loved was a CD, they could learn to accept it.
    I know you asked for singles to respond, but I don't understand how a single person can give you a clue about how to find an accepting GG. So I thought I'd add my 2 cents.

  4. #4
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    I think that most women would rather not have their husband CD, but I have met some that didn't care. My wife has known since a couple of weeks after starting to date. She would rather I didn't but accepts most things. I think most women want certain things in the guy they marry, but it never crosses their minds about having a guy that wears and dresses in the same things they do.

    Some depends on your attitude about CDing and women. I've always been able to make friends with girls/women. I met girls while shopping in women's stores and asked them out and have dated a few. Some relationships continued longer than others. A couple probably went away because of my CDing, but others were very comfortable with it.

    It is possible to find women who don't mind and there are women who fully like it. You just have to find them. I've traveled and met a lot of people over the years and dated a lot of girls before I met my wife. Maybe you aren't meeting enough women. If only 1 in 100 women would find your CDing acceptable then you need to do a lot of finding to find her.

  5. #5
    Senior Age Member sissystephanie's Avatar
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    Like Brandy, I am also not "single!" I am a Widower, who was married for almost 50 years to a lovely lady who totally accepted my crossdressing. I told her that I was a crossdresser when I proposed to her! She not only accepted me "as is," but set it up so that we both wore matching white silk lingerie to our wedding. BTW, I totally agree with the last paragraph of Brandy's email. One of us who either has been or is married to an accepting woman is much better able to give you the proper clues as to how to find one!

    There are certainly many other women out there who accept crossdressing! I found another one purely by accident just months after my wife died. Unfortunately for me she is married and lives in another country. But we are still friends and I have been to her house and she and her husband have been to mine
    Stephanie

    Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

  6. #6
    New Member jackiebelle's Avatar
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    Im 38, single and have been crossdressing since I was a kid. The one long-term relationship (5 years) I have had I didnt tell her in fear she would not understand. We eventually split for other reasons. I have been dating a wonderful lady for about 4 months now and I know if it is to progress I will have to tell her about my crossdressing. The problem I have is at what point you inform your SO about your crossdressing. In the beginning dating stage or when and if love blossoms do you tell her then. I personally believe that your true love will accept you and your crossdressing. Its just about finding that one and falling in love.

  7. #7
    Gold Member Miranda09's Avatar
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    Hi Stephanie. I have opened up to one woman who is married but has turned out to be a very good friend indeed, and supportive. I haven't disclosed this side of me to anyone else....time will tell how I handle that situation! I'm not too concerned tho. If I meet someone who is accepting, then great, if not, who cares. I can still be happy.

  8. #8
    Senior Member UNDERDRESSER's Avatar
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    I recently came out to one female friend, who is very important to me, and she could not have been ]more accepting! We are not yet, in a relationship, but that is because of issues she is working thru completely unrelated to my CD. If anything, the level of trust and honesty i have shown in coming out, has strengthened our friendship, and it has boosted her trust of me, which in turn has allowed her to open up more about her own issues.

    These women are out there, keep looking! Don't give up!

  9. #9
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    I've been alone for the past twenty five years! Guess I was born to be a loner!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  10. #10
    Junior Member smellymelly's Avatar
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    i think its important to establish chemistry first with the person. i think to tell them before dating would be unwise, but to tell them before marriage is not taking their feelings into account.

  11. #11
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    Two days ago I told everything, which is quite a lot from dressing en femme, former male lovers, taste in clothes, to my fast fire romance of four months. Long story short: She is awesome, going shopping, shes doing my makeup this week, she knows me and chooses to be with me. Being honest was the best thing I could have done. I was picky in looking. Look for someone that fits you. Get to know each other. Tell her everything when the time is right and you will never have to hide it again. If she runs... Well there is one out there. Go find her.

    And why would we want an average girl anyway?? When we are not exactly cookie cut men ourselves.

  12. #12
    Junior Member smellymelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miss Informed View Post
    Two days ago I told everything, which is quite a lot from dressing en femme, former male lovers, taste in clothes, to my fast fire romance of four months. Long story short: She is awesome, going shopping, shes doing my makeup this week, she knows me and chooses to be with me. Being honest was the best thing I could have done. I was picky in looking. Look for someone that fits you. Get to know each other. Tell her everything when the time is right and you will never have to hide it again. If she runs... Well there is one out there. Go find her.

    And why would we want an average girl anyway?? When we are not exactly cookie cut men ourselves.
    exactly!!! glad you found your someone! i know what your feeling! having someone you are in a relationship not run away screaming after you tell them such a huge secret is one of the most rewarding feelings of my entire life!

  13. #13
    Silver Member noeleena's Avatar
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    Hi,

    There is another way to see this , why do you have to have some one who you wont to marry. you can have afriend who would just be happy liveing with you with out being tied to each other,

    You know there are people out there who would be quite willing to be a friend live as friends under the same roof share costs & do things together, & yet maintain your own friends, or groups .

    I have family & very tied to them & i wont to be yet Jos & i live apart for now anyways,
    Yes i could have some one come live with me & i have had a guy & his friend in thier own caravans on our section for quite some time i wont go in to details just i was helping them out,

    Im quite happy by my self & im not saying i dont miss Jos being with me , we still do things together as we have done for 37 years, its ( just a time out ) for now its we dont need .....two .....women in the same kitchen , its cool,

    any way thats us,

    ...noeleena...

  14. #14
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    Haven't found anyone willing to accept that part of me, so I just quit looking. It does get lonely at times but on the plus side I can do it whenever I want to, don't have to hide my feminine attire and makeup. I keep my body hair free, just wish I had the will power to lose some weight and the confidence to go out shopping as a woman.

  15. #15
    Gold Member Alice Torn's Avatar
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    Actually, recently, i have come out to three women. One is married, and works at a bank i go to, and acceppts. One, i told several years ago, and lives 2000 miles away, does not accept it, but tolerates. The other, an 80 year old lady, i rented a room with, that was in the same church, also 2000 miles away. I told her on the phone that i put ona dress once in a while, and she laughed! I sent her about 50 photos last week. I agree with some of you, that after friendship and chemistry, it should be ok, to tell them, and after bonding, and chemistry, and respect, there is a better chance they will accept your honesty, and truthfulness , and be more likely to accept, or at least tolerate cding. I am sorry i made it sound imposssible.
    IT TAKES A REAL DRESS TO WEAR A MAN.

  16. #16
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    Some guys feel they have to be with someone and I never really understood that concept.
    I have been married twice and it was nice for the most part but I'm glad both ended.Neither knew about my femme side.
    I love to be free to do whatever I want when I want.I do have a GF and she loves my femme side, we give each other space which is nice.
    My marriages were too confining to be honest always had to do what they wanted or suffer the consequences.
    Both were very jealous types and that just makes it worse.
    I am out to 5 women I know and they all are fine with it and encourage me to just me myself.Dated 3 of them as well.

  17. #17
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    I told one girlfriend. We broke up shortly after but remained friends, and she me gives all the girly advice I can handle!

  18. #18
    Junior Member Princess_Andria's Avatar
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    Never give up hope ever. It dosn't matter your age yes i am young but i feel old....sometimes lol But you never knwo whats round the corner right? Get out there girl! Social network sites are great, of course be cautious and wary you'll never know what you might find. I am currently in a relationship with a very accepting girl and we met on a social network site and i've had quite a number of girls on there messaging me saying how they find CDs sexy and want to continue talking blah blah i don't indulge as i am very happy with my Goddess. You just gotta get out there, be yourself and hope for the best

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by Princess_Andria View Post
    Never give up hope ever. It dosn't matter your age yes i am young but i feel old....sometimes lol But you never knwo whats round the corner right? Get out there girl! Social network sites are great, of course be cautious and wary you'll never know what you might find. I am currently in a relationship with a very accepting girl and we met on a social network site and i've had quite a number of girls on there messaging me saying how they find CDs sexy and want to continue talking blah blah i don't indulge as i am very happy with my Goddess. You just gotta get out there, be yourself and hope for the best
    Pretty much sums it up for me If it wasn't for this site I doubt I would have ever come out totally.
    I joined here scared to death thinking of all the ridicule I would receive.
    Found a sweet bunch of people JUST like me.I am so thankful for this place.
    Wasn't looking for a GF/BF at all and my wonderful GF just came out of nowhere, found her on FB so social networking is pretty cool.

  20. #20
    Cat's Eye Siren ArleneRaquel's Avatar
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    I have not found one female who accepts my lifestyle in so far as a possible mate, but many women who I associate with are most accepting & loving. In general women are more accepting, at least that has been my experience.
    Fulfilling a Lifetime Dream of Living as a Woman in My Adult Years. Ten Years Living 24/7 as a Mature Lady

    My Love of Cat's Eye Frames, Bangles, Red Lipstick, Nails, & Cheeks, Comes From My Mother - An Irish Beauty

    I'm Always Rainbow Proud

  21. #21
    Member StephanieJ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    I joined here scared to death thinking of all the ridicule I would receive.
    Found a sweet bunch of people JUST like me.I am so thankful for this place.
    My sentiments exactly. I would be at a loss right now if it were not for the support of so many of you.

    One thing I've learned about supportive females is that it's a different story when you are married. My wife seemed okay with men cross dressing until she found out that HER man was cross dressing. Then she came unglued. There is something about the marriage relationship that makes things different. Watching other men cross dress didn't threaten her security, but seeing her husband dressed up DID!. Even though her security was never in jeopardy, it was to much for her to take. The lesson here is that supportive girlfriends are not the same as supportive wives.

  22. #22
    Junior Member smellymelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StephanieJ View Post
    My sentiments exactly. I would be at a loss right now if it were not for the support of so many of you.

    One thing I've learned about supportive females is that it's a different story when you are married. My wife seemed okay with men cross dressing until she found out that HER man was cross dressing. Then she came unglued. There is something about the marriage relationship that makes things different. Watching other men cross dress didn't threaten her security, but seeing her husband dressed up DID!. Even though her security was never in jeopardy, it was to much for her to take. The lesson here is that supportive girlfriends are not the same as supportive wives.
    Couldn't it also partially be that she doesn't think she truely knows you, or that she was tricked into marrying you? she probably feels betrayed that she wasn't told before she married you. but i agree i am so blessed with this forum! i like the fact that i am not harassed by trolls and creepy requests for sex. its just us all talking, venting our emotions and kidding around. adore this place =)

  23. #23
    Aspiring Member PrettyFlowingGown's Avatar
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    i do admit, its very tough finding a accepting lady. I've put my name on singles sites and been upfront about my crossdressing, and have'nt had much luck at all.
    I've had a accepting older lady freind for 7 years, but nothings ever happaned sexually.
    I do get lonely though at times. I think the loneliness stemmed my bisexuality years ago too. I have a CD freind who has been having a casual relationship with me, in the last 12 mths, but we leave it as just that. Nothing less, nothing more. We are intimate, and he sleeps over at times, but theres no strings attached so to say.
    I do hope oneday I find someone. Inside, I feel i'm straight, but the loneliness has made me stray outside those boundaries. But I've never regretted anything.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]I love my gorgous flowing evening and ball gowns. I love swishing in them, and feeling how beautiful and shimmering they are. I love to feel like a princess. I love to be elegant, feminine and ladylike.

  24. #24
    Senior Member lisalove's Avatar
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    My last 2 girlfriends were accepting of my crossdressing. Matter of fact I met my last girlfriend on a crossdresser forum, much like this one.. When we started talking on the computer, she was in a rtelationship with a CD, but they broke up, and we started talking more and more til we were dating.
    Neither of them were my type phisically, but they were mentally.
    If it weren't for other circumstances getting in the way, I beleive I'd still be with either of them.
    Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.

  25. #25
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    CD.com is the best of all the CD sites IMO.
    The others I have been a part of were trollish and that was not what I was needing at the time. Found this site by accident and I sure am glad I joined.
    I was freaked out by all the sex chatter on some sites and it just about had me thinking there was something wrong with me.

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