Why am I turning cold feet this time?

[avery.j]

I have purchased apparel from the women's section on numerous occasions before. I have done it online either getting them delivered or opting for store pickup. I have even walked through the aisles in the ladies section and found dresses, skirts, tops and even lace trimmed bras. Now when I need some replacements for old clothes that I donated, I am turning cold feet. In the last couple of days, I added items to my shopping cart but did not order. I drove to the store's parking lot and turned around without stepping out of the jeep. Things in general haven't been great in personal life lately. It could be the reason that I am finding myself so nervous so frequently. I normally dressed around home for a few hours a couple of late evenings every week but I don't remember doing it anymore. Some advice on how to cherish this part of my life once again will really be helpful.

[clairemarie]

Hello Avery,

This is not an unusual feeling. It has happened to me on a number of occasions. For me, the problem was normally caused by stress. I actually thought I had stopped wanting to cross-dress. I was more than a little distressed at this thought and it caused more stress. Cross-dressing is a very important part of who I am. I do not want it to change. I have found if I just don’t worry about it, it will work itself out. Time helps.

Claire

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Avery, You are so young and your mind is still trying to figure the whole CD program.

[KTevolved]

It takes courage i remember when i 1st went shopping i couldnt stop shaking.

[Cynthia Anne]

Having cold feet is not uncommon! It can happen to anyone at anytime! Just like Missouri weather; stick around a day or two and it will change!

[Karren H]

Maybe something has changed? The realities and consequences of getting caught or found out has increased.... or your just internalizing too much about it and blowing it out of proportion.... hard to say given the information provided.... biggest thing is just go out and do it once again and build off that success... try buying something at a store with a self checkout and gain a little confidence.....

[TeriAnn]

I have lost the urge to dress more times than I can count but with time the need always returns. As it has been stated before just give it time and it will return. I had knee surgery June 1st an just now getting back into full dress and heels. Stress and tension will do it every time (with me anyways)

[Cristi]

For the, the 'cold feet' feeling comes and goes. I've found that once I get over the hump and just start doing it, the feeling goes away pretty quickly.

As soon as I get into the store, or actually looking over items, the feeling fades away.

[bridget thronton]

It happens - perhaps you will enjoy shopping again soon

[Beverley Sims]

Cold feet can come from a stare by an older woman wondering what a nice young man is doing among the panties. Dressed or not.
It is purely environment changes that grab you each time.
The store may have changed it's layout you might have been rushing around and NOT focused on what you require.
Just warm your feet up and go for it.
It is perfectly natural to get cold feet.
I do and I think I have been at "IT" long enough to fight it.

[Stephanie47]

I think you're self conscious about being identified as a cross dresser. "Are the people staring at me????" I checked your age (26). You are young enough to be viewed as shopping for a wife or girlfriend, especially around gift buying holidays. Frankly, it is totally natural even for a non cross dressing male to get cold feet and flee the women's aisles, especially unmentionables. When I was young I had absolutely no problems buying lingerie for my wife. I knew it was for her. After so many years I became uncomfortable buying lingerie for her and myself. It seems older men are few and far between in the women's section. I guess the perception is we are no longer horny young guys.

One recommendation I always have to feel somewhat at ease at the checkout counter: Ask for a gift box. That always seemed to convince the cashier and myself the feminine attire is for a woman. Now I pretty much know my sizes for unmentionables, so I order on line. It eliminates any awkwardness and many times it is cheaper. And, since my compulsion is for full slips, it is impossible to find any lacy delicious full slips at brick and mortar retailers! Sigh!

[Angela Campbell]

I never have a problem at the checkout counter....I just put the items up and get out my card and hardly a word or look ever comes about. Now walking down the isles...another story. This is when I start shaking, I see every other person in the store looking at me, and wonder when they will call the cops about the perv hanging around the bra and panties.....somehow I usually get what I need but I always feel very hurried.

[avery.j]

I have been wondering all afternoon if I should step out to the store. I do not genuinely feel nervous while checking out items because I mostly come across twenty something SAs at the checkout counter who always greet nicely like they greet everyone else. I shop for womens clothes along with some mens clothes and some other other household items like laundry detergent and cleaners so it doesn't attract much attention. I do not prefer shopping online anymore because of the mismatch in sizes and quality of items which are displayed and which I actually receive.

Asking for a gift box is a great idea though. I will try it out sometime. I guess if I ask for a gift box in the beginning I may get SA's help as well in finding the right clothes without having to walk through all aisles with eyes wide open and heart racing.

[avery.j]

Hello Avery,

This is not an unusual feeling. It has happened to me on a number of occasions. For me, the problem was normally caused by stress. I actually thought I had stopped wanting to cross-dress. I was more than a little distressed at this thought and it caused more stress. Cross-dressing is a very important part of who I am. I do not want it to change. I have found if I just don’t worry about it, it will work itself out. Time helps.

Claire

I agree with you Claire, trying to stop or not being able to do it causes more stress to accumulate.