So, I have a boyfriend, but I haven't told him yet about my boy side... I don't know how to tell him... He is a very open minded person, I know he won't break up or be degusted by that! I still have plans to tell him, but I know it won't be easy for me to say...
And what about you FM, MF? Do you date, with who you date? Have boy/girlfriend(s)? Are someonde married? How it is like for being a FM (or MF)?
I am MTF and my boyfriend is FTM. We've been together for over a year and a half. We met after both of us started our transitions.
People are often quite understanding and openminded and we usually don't give them enough credit. Who knows how your boyfriend will react, but you owe it to yourself to tell him. Just be open and honest, even if you have uncertainties about certain things.
Own that's so cool! You being MTF and he's FTM, it's really interesting!You both may have really cool stuff to experience! Stuff beyond F and M people usually experience (I believe)!
We are together for almost three years, I discovered that I was a CD almost one year ago... I also have vaginismus, and he has been the most supportive person in the world! He is amazing, an angel, but I believe that is going to be a huuuuuuge shock for him! But I still get nervous to tell him, the only person that I talk about that is my psychotherapist!
Well, he sounds like an understanding guy. And I'm guessing you both already know that genitals are not priority when it comes to a relationship.
It will probably be a shock for him... but there's no way to know. Not being able to have 'normal' intercourse is one thing, but if you transition, he's going to have to make a lot of adjustments when it comes to the physical attraction part. He already loves you for who you are, but if you decide to transition you're going to become quite a bit more physically masculine.
I guess having lived the part, I'm far more open to who I like. I focus a LOT more on the inside than the outside. But I think if you love somebody, you will do anything to be with them.
If you ever want to chat one-on-one, feel free to PM me
BTW, how old are the two of you? How sure are you on the "I'm a tranny part"? Do you plan on transitioning?
---
Both of us being transsexuals really helps us understand each other. Things aren't always easy, but it's always worth it. I think we know each other better than anyone.
Last edited by Bree-asaurus; 10-01-2012 at 08:27 PM.
I have been dating same person for about8-9 years. We broke up once for about a year. We are having trouble with the psychical side of the relationship right now so we take it one step at a time.
It can be tough, even for people who have been together for a fair number of years. I'm MTF, in a 17+ year relationship with a woman. She tends to selectively not hear what she doesn't want to know.
As a general comment, drawing from my experience: sometimes if you want someone to know something, you have to metaphorically hit them over the head with it.
Bree-asaurus:
Sorry for the time, I was very busy with college, but now it's fine kkkkkkk
Well, I'm actually the both genders in the same body, but not in the same time! Sometimes I'm a woman and sometimes I'm a man. My boyfriend would still have the girlfriend, but sometimes I need to let the man come out!
Oh and thanks, if someday I feel the need to chat one-on-one, I'll remember you ^^ thanks a lot! I really appreciate ^^
And I'm 21 and he's 26!
I think what will confuse him more is about my sexual orientation (I don't know if this term is right, sorry), 'cause I'm heterossexual in both sides! I feel atracted to woman, but only when I'm the man. Not that my bf would feel disgusted, but he could feel confused and sad, 'cause he has a trauma because he got cheated in the past. It's not that he don't trust me, but he's afraid that I fall in love with another person and leave him. He knows that he can't leave like that, and he never ever made me feel bad for anything, but I waiting for a good moment in our lives to talk about it so it could be less confused for him.
I have vaginismus, I discovered almost 3 years ago and I still can't have sex, I'm suffering a lot because of it and so does he. We're really sad with our lives right now for a lot of things (family and profession), but in our relationship we're really really happy even with the vaginismus ^^
mistunderstood:
I understand the dificulties with the physical side, but it only make the relationship/people stronger... I hope you're fine!
sandra-leigh:
Hey, it's a good ideia... Metaphors can help! With the right time, I'll think about it, thanks ^^
I started out as a lesbian then a strait guy then ended as bi. I want a committed relationship with women but I would like to try just a one night stand with a guy. I would never do it but if I was single I would.
I'm a MtF CD and do have a GF and she is kind and very approving of me showing my girl side.
I do have my guy side at times but I'm very girly most times.She is fine with it.
She caught an STD years ago from a guy and she knows I'm not going to "go down there" and go snooping and we have a great relationship.
Sex is not the most important part of out relationship its enjoying each other.
I'm like you both genders inside but the female is more dominate.
I wish you all the best and hope your coming out is received with love and understanding.
Last edited by Tracii G; 10-26-2012 at 11:47 AM.
Im in a relationship with my best friend for almost 20 yrs . We were married for 13 yrs then after she found out I was a cd we divorced. We stayed the best of friends and worked it all out and now weve been back together for 3 yrs now and engaged. One day when we find the right dresses we are going to remarry. As she fully accepts me for who I am and Im very lucky.
Renee
Ryan, look up the term bigender in Google. Although I don't switch sexual preference (and most don't from what I can tell), how you describe yourself is pretty consistent with this form of being transgender. I've made a couple posts on it before if you search my post history.
And yes,I live with my girlfriend and her son, who accept both sides of me.
Side tangent. I picked up the son in boy mode from school yesterday and he said, "Mike, I saw Kae at school today!"
I said.. "I was at work all day, I'd think I'd know if I was up here."
He said, "No! There was a woman who looked JUST like you. I was starting at her and she thought I was crazy. She even had the purple streaks in her hair. (referring to my black and purple wig). I thought it was really neat!"
So yes, people will love you and where it comes from will sometimes surprise you.
—Mikaela
He sounds like a great kid Mikaela lucky you!
Yup I'm in a 4 year relationship with Helen who is a fully post op trans woman of 9 years and I am fully post op trans man of two years. We plan to marry next year all going well.... Felix
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Me, Myself and Felix!!
im a MtF crossdresser and im single as of right now but looking for a girl and itd b a HUGE plus if she was a FtM crossdresser!
love
sammie <3
Hey Ryan.....and welcome! I'm MTF and am separated but still living in the same house with my wife. She's been dating since February...and I had my first date 3 weeks ago with a man. I had a wonderful time, but alas he's moving to CA so that was it. But, I am planning on dating with gg's as a guy, and with men as Kristina. I'm just in the beginning stages of this so I'm still a newbie at all this. Been together with my wife for 37 years so it's a whole new world for me and I'm excited by it now!
Ryan,
after being married for a long time, it ended after my wife found out about my dressing. Since then I have dated women as a male and a few men as Gina. I have kept my relationships with women very casual, and intend to keep it that way, not wanting to repeat my experience with my wife. As for the men, they met me as Gina, and knew my "status" from the beginning. I have one female "friend" and one male "friend" with whom I am intimate with, and they both know Gina, and they both know of the other. Hey, I live in So Cal. So far, it works.
i don't know how long you have been dating your BF, but be careful when you tell him because some guys react violently to the revelation the "girl" they've been interested in didn't start out a girl. Especially if there has been any kissing or close contact involved.
Good luck.
xoxo Gina
I'm too loose to be in relationship
So no I don't have any.
It seems that all I can attract are married men. I have tried the dating website scenes and every time I find a guy that I think is alright I find out that he is married. I was talking to this guy for about a month and thought he's an alright guy and so I was getting ready, went through my routine and an hour before we were to meet he posts this message: "I want to be honest and straightforward... I'm married" I felt like puking because I don't want to date any married guys and be the reason to why they break up and have his wife hate me for the rest of her life and blaming me for their breakup. So, I guess you could say that I am done with dating sites, but I'm not done with dating. I just haven't been able to find the right guy... I'm a MTF trans btw.
Angela
OMG, it's been a long time! Thank you for all the messages! I'll read and comment later! I'm almost in vacation, my college is killing me! Thank you so much for sharing your storys and for giving me tips!
I hope this is the final week, and soon I'll be here for much longer!
I moved in with my partner over a year ago - introduced my femme side shortly afterwards - he wasn't too keen on it at first, but after a while he really likes how I present myself, and he's really supportive.But I do dude mode here & there for him too
- Phoebe Brenne
I fear that you may be percieved as a novelty.Originally Posted by Kristen Krew
Find a single guy with no strings attached, even though there maybe kids form a past marriage, but it's very important to find someone who has finally come to terms with himself, with all the scores settled.
I'm a FtM crossdresser, my boyfriend knows and he is fine with it but he's yet to see me in guy mode. I don't know how he'd react.
Hey, maybe you could try to make a threesome... Well, it's not the same thing, but maybe talk with your partner about a open relationship... Well, it's just one night... I think I understand you, I'm monogamy, but I always wanted to have sex with a girl (and I being the boy). I'm committed and even if I would like to have that experience, I would never do...
Own thank you so much ^^ I really appreciate! I agree about the sex, it's not the most important, it's just one part of having a great time with each other!
I'm so happy for you! It really shows that love is the most important! She really missed you, and the most importanted, she start to understood and accept! She grew as a person! I wish the best for you!
Hey, I never heard of that before... Thank you so much! I researched the internet (and I'll see your posts soon!) and I really believe that's it! It makes sense!!! Thank you thank you!!!!!
That's really cool what the son said! I really enjoyed your post, especially the "I was at work all day, I'd think I'd know if I was up here." LOL
Wow that's amazing! Congratulations!!! I'm very happy for you!!! Wish all the best for your marriage!Yup I'm in a 4 year relationship with Helen who is a fully post op trans woman of 9 years and I am fully post op trans man of two years. We plan to marry next year all going well
Hey Sammie! I really believe that a couple FTM+MTF it's a really great experience! It's something I won't have, but I'm hoping that one day and just for a day my boyfriend decides do dress as a woman hehehe
Hey! Thanks! Good luck with the dates!!! That's a great idea to change your gender, it's gonna be a great time to experience and enjoy life!!!
Own thank you Gina! It's good to see that you're enjoying too! Sometimes I believe that it's sort of a privilege having both experiences (even if we live in a world full of prejudice)! And about my BF, I thought that could happen, but if he's gonna be mad, it's gonna be in silence, he's like that...
Hehe that's cool, the most important thing is that your happy! Even if you're dating or not!I'm too loose to be in relationship
So no I don't have any.
Yeah, it's not cool to date a married person, but think about it: the only wrong person is the married person, 'cause if it was not you, it was someone else (although I still think it's not cool to date someone commited).
I don't know what to say, but keep looking! Good luck with your dates!!! The right person will appear in the right time! (clichè, but it's so true!)
Hey, that's amazing! I'm really happy for you!!! That's really cool and cute!I moved in with my partner over a year ago - introduced my femme side shortly afterwards - he wasn't too keen on it at first, but after a while he really likes how I present myself, and he's really supportive.
Own it's really great that he accepted that! I really think he'll react fine!
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