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Thread: First time in public dressed

  1. #1
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    First time in public dressed

    About a week ago the SO wanted me to dress and go out shopping with her. She helped with the makeup and clothes and decided to drive to a nearby town to do some shopping and get me out in dress. She decided to go to walmart and i was pretty nervice, but went ahead and went in, once in the store I had that feeling that everyone was staring at me, im guessing it was just the nerves and she said I did a fairly good job and blending in and she didn't see anyone staring. Is that feeling something that will go away with more confidence? Its been nice to have a supportive wife and she has also wanted me to dress on a couple other occasions since then.

  2. #2
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    Does she have any sisters?

  3. #3
    Bunny Bordello rachel_rachel's Avatar
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    I feels great, I'm yet to go out with anybody myself, but i'm slowly making longer trips dressed whilst driving.. Last night i went out in boy mode came home in girl mode.. That was 25kms, 8 sets of traffic lights too. albeit at night time.
    i am what I am, I do what I do..
    i do not seek approval from others.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member Amanda_P's Avatar
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    Sounds to me like you got yourself a great wife. The feeling of everyone staring at you will pass as you accept yourself as just one of the girls. No one is really looking unless your hidious and I dought that. It's just a feeling we all have that we need to over come. I still have that feeling myself. That's why I hide in the clothes racks until no one is around. But if you are comfortable in what you are doing then no one will even notice.

  5. #5
    Member johanna.kitten's Avatar
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    Good for you, it is nice to have a supporting SO. And yes, this feeling that people stare at you - it will go away, even if it might not fully go away, you will probably just enjoy stiring things up for people for the day, perhaps planting some seeds in their minds whilst at it, who knows?

    Hugs
    /Giovanna - full time since ~May 2012
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member Noel Chimes's Avatar
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    The first time out is the hardest, and yes you feel like the whole world is staring right at you. It's just nerves reacting to a new experience. In time those feelings will pass and you will soon realize that the everyone is in their own world. From then on it's all about having fun and being who you are. So give your SO a great big hug and let her know she is SUPER SPECIAL. (suggestion- dinner out just to say "thank you")
    If the clothes make the man then the makeup makes the woman.

  7. #7
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    I recommend lots of practice KartneyAnn! Get out as much as you want and it will become old hat in no time. And make sure you do something for that wonderful wife of yours. As nervous as we are going out the first time, the wives are often more nervous. Think about it, someone may see us and if they make us, think that's a guy. Our wives are on display as themselves, so there is no chance of them not being recognized by someone they know. Give her a big one of these from us.

  8. #8
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    What a thrill that first time out dressed! It gets better with practice! You have a fantastic wife! Make sure she knows it! Hugs!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  9. #9
    Member jennifer24's Avatar
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    Glad you decided to finally step out, trust me we all was on pins and needles when we 1st went out, but the more you do it the more self confidence you will have, and its great to have a supporting wife to help you along.

  10. #10
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    Congratulations. It will get easier over time, and IF someone has a problem with it at some time...SO what?

    The most important thing to keep in mind is that you are NOT doing anything wrong and are not breaking any laws.

    Sounds like you have a gem of a wife too. Better hang on tight to her!

  11. #11
    Member Lainie's Avatar
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    Congratulations!

    and again, Congratulations! Give your wife the hugs & kisses she deserves, and general gratitude as well.

    It can be scary, it will get better. I go out fully en femme with a handlebar mustache, so everyone knows for sure I'm a man in a dress. I'm on my best behavior, and people are nice. Many smile, most ignore me just as they do everyone else, very rarely are there shocked expressions, expressed disapproval even rarer. Of course I go to fashion boutiques & restaurants, not biker bars.

    Girls just want to have fun!

    Lainie

    You're only young once, but you can be immature forever!

  12. #12
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    Your wife is a gem and a very special woman for accepting always remember this.
    No one cares how you dress/present trust me they are in their own little world.
    It will get easier so no need to worry.

  13. #13
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Yes...that feeling will disapate as you gain experience and spend more time in public. My first time I had the same feeling. All eyes are on me. It's natural to feel that way after we have all spent so much time in the closet. As my day went on I started watching others and saw that they were involved in what they were doing and were not paying much attention to me.
    Now after many many times out I don't even look at others to see if they watch...I'm just me doing things as others do. If they notice, so be it...it's not the end of the world. If they stare...then please take a picture...it will last longer. If they comment...oh well, it' their problem, not mine.

    Just be confident that you belong where ever it is you go. You will relax and ignore others, just as they mostly will ignore you as they go about their business.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  14. #14
    Gold Member Alice B's Avatar
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    It will go away and having such a super supportative wife makes it all the easier. Have fun.

  15. #15
    Member Algoma's Avatar
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    Don't get out as much as I would like

    Been out to clubs at night to meet other Gurls, Nothing like it! Day time shopping is still very hard for me. And only do it when not in the home town.

    Algoma

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member MsRenee's Avatar
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    The first time out is always abit scary It was nice you had someone to go with you.I remember my first time out I was more afraid of getting pulled over by the cops then anything else. After a few more trips it gets to be pretty easy and being here in Vegas its very easy just to go out and do anything. Love it.
    Renee

  17. #17
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Having someone to support you is always good.
    You do not stand out in the crowd so much as others see you with another person.
    If they see you alone and you look like a deer in the headlights you have a harder road to follow.
    First time out is always the worst and as everyone says it gets easier each time you go out.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  18. #18
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    Thanks for all the support, Im looking forward to our next trip and it will for sure be longer. Ya it was nice to have someone to go with me would like to go to a club but nothing very exciting in this little town. Have talked about taking a trip for a weekend in a town where no one knows either of us. I would also like to find someone in the area to go out with or just hang out with but its hard when u live in a small town. Well again thanks and I did tell my SO she is the best.

  19. #19
    A California Girl Rachel Morley's Avatar
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    Your SO sounds just like mine When I first started going out my wife wanted to go to Walmart with me dressed and at the time, I too was scared. I think SOs like ours are very protective of us when we are dressed and out in public, especially when we first start to go out in the mainstream.

    It does get easier and your nerves will go away. I still get a little bit quiet and shy depending on where I am and who is around me, and how close they are to me but it is so much easier having your SO right there by your side. In a way I think its kind of cheating as it makes me feel more confident when I go out with a GG who wants "to take care of you"
    .
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  20. #20
    forever in pantyhose Jill's Avatar
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    I've been out a few times now, going out is still kind of a new thing for me and I really enjoy it when I'm able to get out. I went out a couple times a couple years ago and felt self-conscious the entire time. Felt like everyone was staring. I feel like when it comes to going out, you kind of have to go when you're ready. If you go out and all you feel is nervousness and like everyone is staring, maybe you're not quite ready yet?

  21. #21
    Diamond Member Persephone's Avatar
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    Hi!

    First and most important, you have a very special and supportive wife! Give her extra hugs and kisses and be sure to let her know how much you appreciate her love and support!

    I well remember the panic of those first few trips out! Heart stopping, can't breathe. Oh geez, what do I do now???

    Two stand out most to me. One was a woman looking at me in a waiting line at a popular restaurant. I tried to hide behind a fake palm tree! Which REALLY made her wonder about me!

    But the all-time worst for me was just about the very first time my spouse and I were out on a road trip. We stopped for a potty break and lunch at a coffee shop. As we headed in there were two Sheriff's officers sitting at a table and watching me!!! No choice, keep going, head into the lady's room -- panic -- they wouldn't follow me in here, would they??? -- wonder if I can climb out the window and head for the truck -- Damn! there are bars on the window!!!

    Here's the bottom line -- Yes, people ARE looking at you!!! For a simple reason -- you are a woman! As a guy nobody ever looks at you. You're a grey penguin, one of millions, and you don't matter. But you are in girl world now. And men and women always check you out. Everyone you pass will glance at you. You are the show, you are on stage anytime the front door closes behind you. Your confidence and your femininity have to be "on" starting the moment you walk out that door.

    If you are attractive they'll look, downright stare, even more. The guys will be salivating, the women will be disassembling you as a study guide and 'cause they hate you.

    There are only two solutions. Head back into the house and forget it or learn to own being a woman. Learn to ignore the men, never look at them unless they speak to you, and always, always do a "girl smile" when you make eye contact with the women.

    Your wife probably does these things automatically so, as loving and as helpful as she is being, she hasn't thought about trying to teach them to you. You look like a grown woman so she may just assume you know how to handle yourself.

    You can learn them by sitting someplace and watching, really watching, behavior and interaction on the part of men and women. You can learn by watching your wife's behavior in all kinds of situations. And if she is open to it, you can learn by asking her specific questions that will help her think about the simple, automatic behaviors she takes for granted.

    Hope that helps.

    Hugs,
    Persephone.
    "If you are living the life you want to live you've successfully transitioned to being the person you want to be." - Eryn.

    "If you truly care about me you should damn well want for me what I want for myself" - Michael Westen (Burn Notice)

    -.-. --.-/-.-. --.-/-.-. -../ Persephone™ and Persephone™ are trademarks of Persephone herself, accept no substitutes. The terms "en femme" and "en drab" originated with Marcia Sampson/Staylace (OBM).

  22. #22
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
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    Sounds like a great trip out, and I'll bet if people had been staring at you, your wife would have noticed. Besides, you where out of your home area, not likely to run into anyone you know, and you had a great friend and supporter with you, how could it have been any better.
    It's just like shopping for female clothes, at first you think there must be a big red CD on your forehead, and then one day you realize, no one is looking at your forehead anyway. Besides it was Wal mart, you see everything at Wal Mart. Go check out people at Walmart.com even if someone did see you, I bet you looked a lot more normal than most of them.
    Tina B.
    Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.

  23. #23
    To shy shy... Alicew's Avatar
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    Great to here youve got a good SO there make the most of it let her drag you anywhere she wants to go =).

    Recently as in this morning i did my first outdoor underdressing i get the house to my self on a sunday so i make the most of it,so nothin to major bra panties set in lovely red and black spots and my little B cup small C fillers with my usual drab over it and i was sweating the entire time walking the dog on the usual cross country route i go.
    Usually bump into other walkers o nte way say hi and such today i happen to bump into someone with way to many dogs to handle so theres me standing on side of path with these 2 lumps hanging off me as this women squeezes passed she had to off seen them but nothing on she went.

    Had to take a sec to gather my nerves and carry on after that i imagined the coppers coming to get me, was totally worth it tho making baby steps is where it begins
    Last edited by Alicew; 10-07-2012 at 01:46 PM. Reason: crap keybard again must change batteries

  24. #24
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    Hi Kartneyann, You are for sure one of the lucky ladies yuu have a wonderful wife.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

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  25. #25
    Member Starr's Avatar
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    I go out all the time now as my gurl self.. and it is pretty normal to me.. i have had no problems and go pretty much were i want dressed.. i don't even pay any attention anymore.. the only ones to really look are the ones i meet face to face and close up or the ones i have to talk to .. the others take me as i appear to be.

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