What's the motivation?

[Jenniferx]

It's still sexual after all these decades. Once an incredible orgasm is achieved the clothing and makeup come off. I've only had one gf in my entire life that shared CD sex with me and that's ancient history.

Hi Dee,
Well, I'm not sure if it will change for you like it has for me, obviously a big part of the tie in to dressing starts as a sexual thing when young, and it became for me like I had to go further and further with my dressing (not a bad thing but $$$) to even try to get the same sexual high I first experienced and I never could match those early experiences. I can remember just ruining an outfit in minutes-Ha Ha. But now I treasure the time spent shopping, getting ready, maybe just lounging all day in lingerie- its what I love now.
Love, Jenn

[ReineD]

Reine, I can answer part of your question as it relates to myself. I am a TS.

... it was not sexual at all until puberty when it got exciting, although during that time almost anything was exciting. In my 20's the sexual exitement was much less but my desire to wear the clothes was not.

... I would go years without wearing a single peice of womens attire but not even a day went by I didn't wish to be female.

Thanks for your response. And it is true that everything is sexual to a teenage boy whose libido is testosterone driven, whether she is TS or not.

[Brittany CD]

For me, I've just always felt like doing it. I love putting on women's garments and I love wearing wigs

[Eryn]

The way I explain it to non-CDers is to consider a world where chocolate is the focal point of society. People are always describing how wonderful their chocolate tastes. The aroma fills the air. Everyone displays their chocolate proudly and prominently. The media is filled with chocolate shows. The world revolves around chocolate.

There's only one problem: You are forbidden to eat chocolate. It's not an allergy, just an edict from above. You're expected to interact on a daily basis with chocolate eaters, compliment them on their chocolate, buy chocolate for them, etc. but not a taste for yourself!

Wouldn't you feel a bit odd in this situation? That's the way that CDers feel all the time as GGs go about their daily business around us.

[Jenniferx]

Some thoughts:

I once read a comparison made between the super "highs" that both men and women feel when they fall in love in a particularly intense way with each other (can't sleep, can't eat, can't concentrate on anything other than wanting to be with each other, intense fantasies about each other, etc) and the similar sexual euphoria that CDers experience when they are younger and they dress.

With couples, the sheer excitement abates after only a few years and as they reach middle age (or even before) the intensely sexual feelings abate as well, and their relationship takes on a more comfortable routine. They've bonded together and they are deeply devoted to each other like best friends, but their relationship is much calmer. I'm wondering if the same thing happens with a CDer's sexual relationship with himself dressed: the libido that was once so strong abates with normal aging, and what is left is a deep bond to the femme self that results in the same type of comfortable feeling ... in much the same way that intensely sexual relationships between couples function to bond them for life (barring marital difficulties).

To the transsexuals (or TS questioning folks) who may be reading this, I wonder if the sexual feelings when you first began to dress were as strong as many CDers describe, and if anyone knows how to describe the difference between a TS who expresses an innate sexuality, and a CDer who reacts to the CDing the way it is described in this thread.

Hope you don't mind that I'm asking this question in your thread Jenn, but it ties into a few other threads that I've participated in recently.

Hi Reine,
Gosh I don't mind this at all, I appreciate the insight, frankly I'd never considered this angle- comparing a couple's lovers high to a crossdresser's relationship to their alter ego. I'd say I was in love with the young girl in the mirror, but not in a way I've ever been in love with a partner. This sexual charge from dressing was weakening, sickening in some ways, but always the desire was to come back to it for more, but better than the last time. Love of a partner has never been this electric or needy- for me anyway. Sure it's narcisstic to say, I think the very act of CD-ing is, at least if you do it right, maybe this in part is what threatens or worries our girlfriends or wives, they can see the power these feelings have over us, blinds us in the pink fog, and they don't know how to relate to it. How could they relate, there is no other reference in our love lives that compares to our desires. Anyway, lucky for me I'm no longer crazy, just mellowed out.
Jenn

[ReineD]

I'd say I was in love with the young girl in the mirror, but not in a way I've ever been in love with a partner. This sexual charge from dressing was weakening, sickening in some ways, but always the desire was to come back to it for more, but better than the last time. Love of a partner has never been this electric or needy- for me anyway.

That's just it! The relationship with self will be different emotionally than a relationship with a wife, but the point is there is a purpose for all the endorphins in the beginning of any sexual relationship, and this is to form lasting bonds. In the case of couples, the lasting bonds are desirable to provide stability for the rearing of children, else everyone would just have sex, have fun, and then move on which in a primal sense would leave the wife and child unprotected.

It's just pure biology. I think that if someone is TS, they already have an innate feminine gender and their need to transition is sourced (I believe) from a different place than someone who has an intensely sexual beginning with all of this.

[Brianna612]

I think the sexual thing would happen no matter what, but yes in my teens it was sexual. In my 20s it was more of a fetish. Running around with wild makeup, short skirts, ripped fishnets, and sexy tops. I hung around with the queens and the gays even though I never was gay and never felt that way it was just the group that I ran with. 30s meant responsibilities, needed to settle down. Dressing had to stop and I needed to raise a family. I stopped dressing. I became very irritable, high strung, flew off the handle quickly and often. Late 30s couldn't handle it anymore had to dress. Right away a calming feeling came over me. Not sexual, not fetish but me.

I now dress because it is me and it was me all along. Why did it take me 40 years to figure that out? At least I figured it out and it feels great to be whole.