Why Women Don't Crossdress (IMHO)

[ReineD]

My SO finds it much easier to get dresses to fit, than two piece outfits or even pyjama sets, which I think is common for CDers. She has to buy a top that is one or two sizes larger than the bottom, even when she wears her breast forms and hip pads, and this is to accommodate her shoulders. If she didn't wear any breast forms though, even the dresses wouldn't hang correctly. And she is not heavy.

With the dresses, I think that clothing manufacturers must accommodate a wide variety of women's shapes and heights, and many are designed to be fairly flexible. I personally prefer a tailored fit and so there are a few brand names that I try to stick to that I know will fit me like a glove. If the dress is tailored I have a hard time finding one that is long bodied enough (the waist of the dress is always too high on me) and I fare better when I find sizes for tall women, same as in one piece bathing suits.

[Sara Jessica]

There are certain things which are givens...

• Women happen to have more fashion choices.
• 99.whatever percent of men are all good with not having the fashion choices that women have.
• Women who choose to wear stuff other than dresses, high heels, lacey lingerie, hosiery daily, etc. are in no way any less of a woman by virtue of their fashion selection. Most can rock the uber-casual jeans & a top and remain unmistakably feminine.
• Women exercising their wide variety of fashion choices are in no way "crossdressing" in a classic sense.

There is certainly an interesting asymmetry in the MTF versus FTM demographics but nobody I've seen has really presented a definitive and plausable explanation for the lopsided numbers.

I'll give it a try.

Roll with me on this one. This is based on something that I heard many years ago and I have NOTHING to back it up other than a reasonable interpretation of the numbers of such things we see in society.

This also takes a leap of faith when it comes to lumping in the TG experience (whether fetish to full-on CD'ing and even TS) with other things that might be considered afflictions or worse. Please know that I do not believe any of us suffers from being TG from the POV of it being an affliction. But this does assume that our TG nature is just that for many of us...nature, rather than a learned behavior.

OK, here goes...and yes, I'm going to try to keep it overly-simplistic.

In the development of the human embryo, if things stay the course we have a female. If a switch of some sort if flipped, then we have a male. It is this process which can be fraught with the potential for issues.

If one measures the things society considers to be outlier behavior, whether deviant from the norm or outright abhorrent, these things are usually more common among males. Not impossible for females but simply less likely.

Accepting a "nature" component and putting this into the context of TG, it would then make sense that this might explain the difference of MTF versus FTM demographics, that issues in our collective development make it more likely for males to demonstrate this propensity than females.

However, it would take a higher leap of faith and perhaps many more assumptions (including bringing in societal implications) to explain the distribution of CD versus TS within the respective communities.

[missmars]

because woman is less varous than man. there are more genious man and mor fool man than woman.

[Jenniferathome]

In my corner of the world, when women dresses in a menswear suit and full makeup or throws on her boyfriend's shirt over jeeans and skips the makeup she is readily accepted and even complemented on her choices. Later that night she can put on an LBD and heels and get a similar response. When she gets home she can change into women's panties that are dead ringers for a guys tighty whities and all is good with the world.

Man, this lament never stops. First, women do not, ever, wear a "menswear" suit. They wear tailored suits for women. While they may have a hint of similarity to the male version, they are unmistakenly feminine. I have never seen a woman out and about in her boyfriend's shirt. They just don't fit right! They are not crossdressing.

[linda allen]

Where I used to work, most of the workers were male. The uniforms were "male" uniforms and if a female worker wanted a uniform, she was told to try on the male uniforms and select whatever fit the best. Later, they contracted for "female" tailored uniforms as well. Still pants and shirts though.

[Angela Campbell]

It wasn't that long ago that women were not normally wearing pants at all. Dresses or skirts only. A woman was frowned upon if she did and considered abnormal. As more and more women began to wear these "men only" articles of clothing, and became more accepted with doing so the manufacturers of the clothes began to taylor the pants and other clothes for a female body. A woman doing so wore pants or jeans that were made for a man. So in a sense it started with women crossdressing and because of many doing so it became accepted. The difference is that when women did it they were not attempting to look like a man at all. When a man crossdresses he does try to look like a woman. Also remember that with many men crossdressing begins as a sexual thrill, or if not at the beginning (if started very young) it many times becomes a sexual thing. I have not heard of woman wearing tidy whiteys because it gives them a sexual thrill.

Face it. Women are allowed more leeway with experimentation in their looks and clothes than are men. A woman can wear a pair of mens jeans and tennis shoes and it is ok by all, while a man can never wear a bit of lace or a pair of pumps without someone thinking something is odd about it.

[LilSissyStevie]

The real reason that women don't crossdress is that it is culturally impossible. There is nothing that women could wear, outside of maybe a jock strap, that would raise any eyebrows. I can think of lots of examples of women wearing clothes from the men's department yet no one (including me) would consider them crossdressers.

My mother is a member of a very liberal congregation of Methodists. I met the female minister a few years ago when my step father died. When I met her she was wearing wingtip shoes, Docker slacks, alligator polo shirt, a belt from the men's department, wallet in her back pocket, and her hair was cut very short. Yet no one who saw her would think "crossdresser", they would probably think "lesbian" and they would be correct in this case. Although all her clothes were from the men's department, there was no mistaking that she was a woman. However, if a man were to wear just a skirt while making no effort to present as a woman, he would still be considered a crossdresser.

Arguing that women's jeans, for instance, are made for women is kind of disingenuous. When I was a teenager, there was no such thing as women's Levi's so girls bought "men's" Levi's to fit their hips and bunched them at the waist with a belt. There was no such thing as women's jeans until the '70s when the evil capitalists figured out there was a market for them. Even in those days, no one thought that girls wearing men's jeans were crossdressers. But you would not believe the crap I got for just having long hair. I'm literally lucky to be alive today.

In our culture, as it stands today, there are only two gendered clothing styles: female and unisex. I don't know why there is so much denial about this fact. Women can wear either style or a little of each but men can only wear the unisex style without drawing negative attention. There really isn't any such thing as menswear anymore. This was obvious to me a couple of years ago when Anne Hathaway did a skit at the Oscars wearing a tux and no one got the "joke" until James Franco came out in a dress - ha ha. Do I fret about the unfairness of it all? No!

I don't really have a dog in this fight since I relate more to drag queens than the typical female wannabe crossdresser. I don't worry about what the "average" woman wears. If all women decided today to wear only the unisex style, it wouldn't affect me one bit. In 1969 I participated in a student strike at my high school in part protesting the ban on girls wearing jeans (also the ban on long hair for boys and the ban on blacks having afros - we won.) Women should wear what they like. I wear what I like and what I like is considered by our culture to be ultra feminine. It doesn't matter to me that most women wouldn't be caught dead dressed like me when I'm "crossdressed" and I don't try very hard to dress like them.

Another way to look at it is that because I'm a male, I CAN crossdress, women can't.

[Anita_2]

I think women are CD allso but it is normal in this fashion for women to wear socks and jeans but it is not normal for man to wear stockings and skirt - why it is so I dont untherstand??? Anyone nows answer?

[jennifer24]

I agree that it would be nice if we as cd's could go out and not be frowned upon by the general public. Times are changing, but until we actually go out in mass quantities, people will always be frowning on us. It's a status thing ya know. It sucks. I would love to be able to throw on a skirt and go to work, but I would be laughed out of the place and my boss would tell me to go home and change.

I agree with you Marlana, it would be nice to not be frowned upon by others, its the sociaty we live in but things are starting to change, we have came along way with more bridges to cross but I can see in the for seeable future that these issues will not even come up.
Aand it is all a numbers thing, the more we out the more we will be excepted and eventally we become the norm.
I will also join the fight too.

[Terri]

When in Rome? .....

Ilike our wat of thinking Kelly!

[raksha GG]

For those who say women don't crossdress - I used to know a lovely lady, she was in her late 60's/early 70's, single and had been born and raised in the same small village in the Home Counties. She always wore a man's suit, shirt, hat and shoes. Not tailored for a woman - a MAN's suit. The villagers accepted her for who she was, and she was protected by then to a certain extent. She was my first knowledge of a crossdresser (apart from the Dame in Pantomime)

I think women are CD allso but it is normal in this fashion for women to wear socks and jeans but it is not normal for man to wear stockings and skirt - why it is so I dont untherstand??? Anyone nows answer?

I'd suggest it's to do with being 'ready and able' - a man could jump and leap and climb and ride in clothing which seperated the legs (only very recently known as trousers), a woman was far more restricted (and that was how men liked it) it also kept her female form hidden

[Anita_2]

I'd suggest it's to do with being 'ready and able' - a man could jump and leap and climb and ride in clothing which seperated the legs (only very recently known as trousers), a woman was far more restricted (and that was how men liked it) it also kept her female form hidden

Yes but that was good reason – later excuse for CD - in princip lot of women is CD – I now a few which are always wearing trousers and socks (man socks) with veery little makeup but no one has no any comment for that, I think they are more CD orientation.

[ReineD]

... with veery little makeup but no one has no any comment for that, I think they are more CD orientation.

Women are not born with makeup on and they are changing their natural appearance by wearing it. It is widely, inexpensively manufactured today in a plethora of products and colors, and in my opinion the average woman buys into the false ideal that she needs the makeup to hide her flaws or enhance certain of her natural features, in order to attain the same level of facial perfection that models or actresses have. But, it is very much a false ideal constructed by the fashion industry. In my opinion.

The most beautiful women need very little makeup at all. And the most secure women, do not feel the need to wear it all the time. This does not mean that they wish to present as men and it is a mistake to believe that women who don't wear makeup are more "CD oriented".

This woman, who was a child model and has been a style and beauty editor, explains it better than me:

http://www.xojane.com/beauty/why-i-d...hat-men-prefer

[Eryn]

I find an article about not wearing makeup rather ironic when the author, in the second sentence, says "I rarely leave the house without mascara and blush." Most women in my circle of observation, limit their everyday makeup to lipstick only.

That said, I don't think that there is any mass conspiracy on the part of the fashion industry to force women to wear makeup. Women are themselves a willing part of the formula, because they make the decision to buy the products. If the fashion industry really had that much unilateral power then why aren't they pushing cosmetics to men? After all, that represents a vast untapped market and there are plenty of willing spokesmen out there, male entertainment personalities who themselves wear theatrical makeup.

[Jenniferathome]

AAAGGGRRRR! WE'RE NOT WEARING GUY STUFF!!! And the rest of your statement is so entrenched in CD mindspeak that it blows my mind. . ........

CDers, on the other hand, wear wigs, makeup, bras, forms, hip pads, waist cinchers, women's shoes, hose, perfume, jewelry, and purses.

It's OK, you're all allowed to do this, but please stop saying that women are wearing men's things.

They ain't going to understand. The ability of the crossdresser to deny reality is astounding. Maybe there is a different way to think about crossdressing: you are not crossdressing if there is no emotional attachment to the act and visa versa. Think about that.... It works.

[Jamie001]

AAAGGGRRRR! WE'RE NOT WEARING GUY STUFF!!!

Reine,

It is true that women wear guy's stuff including Boyfriend Jeans, Boyfriend Shoes, men's watches, neckties, men's jackets and many other men's items but that do it as women. They don't attempt to deceive folks into thinking that they are men. It is exactly the same as when I wear capri pants, women's sandals, and toenail polish because I don't attempt to deceive folks into thinking I'm a woman. I'm just a feminine guy that likes to wear women's fashion. Several years ago there was an article in the New York Times about women wearing large men's high-end watches like men's Rolexes. The article encouraged women to do this. Also, if you read women's magazines such as Cosmo, Elle, etc, there have been many articles over the last 5 years about how to raid your husband's/boyfriend's closet and incorporate male items into your wardrobe. Please do some checking and you will confirm what I'm telling you. Crossing the gender barrier of fashion is encourage for women. As someone here stated, there are two categories of clothing: 1. Women's Clothing and Unisex Clothing. Men are only permitted to wear unisex clothing.

[Gaz]

Man, this lament never stops. First, women do not, ever, wear a "menswear" suit. They wear tailored suits for women. While they may have a hint of similarity to the male version, they are unmistakenly feminine. I have never seen a woman out and about in her boyfriend's shirt. They just don't fit right! They are not crossdressing.

Not always. My wife has (in her words) "gigantic humongous mongoloid feet" that she has a hard time finding comfortable shoes in. (She's WAY overstating it, she's a 9.5-10, and prefers wide widths) and has often bought "men's" tennis shoes because she finds them more comfortable. Similarly, when we were dating, if she stayed over at my place, she would snag a t-shirt and pair of boxers from my drawer, and wear those around my apartment before bed. Without asking, thinking nothing of it, and without me batting an eyelid.

Now imagine if the tables were turned. If a 20-something guy were dating a girl, stayed over at her place, and came out of her bedroom wearing one of her camis and pair of her panties? Methinks an eyebrow would be batted. (Hell, methinks a head would be batted!)

Also worth bearing in mind that not too long ago, a woman in a t-shirt and jeans - be it cut for her or not - was frowned upon. And high heels, remember, were originally made for and worn by men, in the court of Louis XIV.

The difference, I think, is that women got sick of being stereotyped and pigeon-holed, and decided en masse that enough was enough. If they wanted to wear jeans and a t-shirt, not wear a bra, or wear a suit and tie to work, then men had no bloody right to tell them otherwise. And they were 100% right. The urge for women to wear more masculine clothes wasn't borne out of an urge to be masculine, but from an urge to be equal. But no mistake, the women at the forefront of this movement were indeed crossdressing. Those tailored suits for women you speak of didn't appear from nowhere, they appeared much later because enterprising young businesses realized this was here to stay, saw a need for such a thing, and filled it. Were men to do the same - rise up and demand equality - then I think the result wouldn't be acceptance of men in women's clothing, it would result in a whole new line of heels, skirts, and dresses designed specifically for men.

But then it wouldn't be crossdressing anymore, just as women wearing a pant suit from Ann Taylor isn't.

[ReineD]

That said, I don't think that there is any mass conspiracy on the part of the fashion industry to force women to wear makeup. Women are themselves a willing part of the formula, because they make the decision to buy the products.

You're correct, we're part of the problem, myself included. I buy into it just like everyone else. My SO and I went out tonight and I put on foundation, blush, I filled in my brows with eye shadow, a touch of eyeshadow on my lids, mascara, lip liner & lipstick.

We're all products of our environment, an environment that tells us that we are prettier if we alter our looks by wearing makeup. My objection is, why can't we be pretty enough without painting our faces? Who decides that women look better with makeup?

Years ago I saw a talk show, I can't remember if it was Oprah or Dr. Phil. The topic was women who feel they are not "good enough" when they go out without makeup. Or they feel naked without it. This was sad indeed. I'm not saying that every woman falls prey to this, but there are a lot who do and the wearing of makeup is so much a part of our culture that few women (in my opinion) ever stop to think about how unnatural it really is to wear makeup. We just put it on without questioning it, maybe not to run to the grocery store, but certain when we go out like I did tonight. And then we have members in this forum who believe that we are masculine when we DON'T wear it, which is absurd if you stop to consider that we are not feminine enough when we are in our natural states.

The woman who's blog I linked to - there are many voices that echo her concerns. She was not saying to not put on makeup at all, just that it's OK if a woman chooses to not wear any sometimes and when she does choose to buy a product, she needn't become a victim to all the marketing hype.

It's not just the makeup. It's the idea that we need to have a certain type of body, a certain size of breasts, etc, in order to meet the beauty "ideal". I've been blessed with height and good proportions without having to work at it much and all my life some friends have said how they wished they had a body like mine. I can't tell you how sad this makes me, because in my eyes each and every one of these women is beautiful just the way she is. By what standards do these women compare themselves to? It is my opinion that they subconsciously compare themselves to the thousands upon thousands images of ideal beauty they've seen throughout their lives in magazines, catalogs, on TV, the cinema, the same media that shows women with perfect hair, perfect teeth, perfect makeup, perfect clothes, ideal figures. And it begins with the Barbie doll. LOL

OK. Sorry for the rant. When I talk to my friends about this, they all agree. I'll get off the soapbox now. I don't expect to convince anyone here, and that's OK.

[Anita_2]

Women are not born with makeup on and they are changing their natural appearance by wearing it. It is widely, inexpensively manufactured today in a plethora of products and colors, and in my opinion the average woman buys into the false ideal that she needs the makeup to hide her flaws or enhance certain of her natural features, in order to attain the same level of facial perfection that models or actresses have. But, it is very much a false ideal constructed by the fashion industry. In my opinion.

The most beautiful women need very little makeup at all. And the most secure women, do not feel the need to wear it all the time. This does not mean that they wish to present as men and it is a mistake to believe that women who don't wear makeup are more "CD oriented".

This woman, who was a child model and has been a style and beauty editor, explains it better than me:

http://www.xojane.com/beauty/why-i-d...hat-men-prefer

I think you have not understand me well (maybe is problem in my English I have no practice in conversation for a years) my idea was to say:
1.Women can dress what they wont and what they feel pleasurable in – no one will tell that they are CD.
2.Women must not be representative dressed as women by tradition (I think skirt an make up) and no one will tell that she is CD or lesbian.
That is reason why there is no women CD – no one in this days is putting barriers in womans dressing and if women have CD orientation she can realize it with any problem even she must not know that it is CD orientation.

For mans part of communities the rules in dressing are strictly set – as it was for women 100 years ago.

[WifeofWrenchette]

I haven't worn makeup in at least 20 years. I don't and haven't worn a bra in the last 10 years. I hate make up and I hate bras, pantyhose, and dresses. I wear shorts and tee shirts or pants on occasion. They are ladies clothes bought in the ladies section. I consider myself feminine. Perhaps others look down upon on me not wearing the accoutrements of females, but I look at it at as their problem, not mine.

[Anita_2]

I haven't worn makeup in at least 20 years. I don't and haven't worn a bra in the last 10 years. I hate make up and I hate bras, pantyhose, and dresses. I wear shorts and tee shirts or pants on occasion. They are ladies clothes bought in the ladies section. I consider myself feminine. Perhaps others look down upon on me not wearing the accoutrements of females, but I look at it at as their problem, not mine.

Thank you that is what I want to tell - standard for womens dressing is another and no one cares what it is. May be if one day we have make up, bras, pantyhose, and dresses on mans clothes department somebody will ask "Why there is no more CDs?"

[Sandra]

I haven't worn makeup in at least 20 years. I don't and haven't worn a bra in the last 10 years. I hate make up and I hate bras, pantyhose, and dresses. I wear shorts and tee shirts or pants on occasion. They are ladies clothes bought in the ladies section. I consider myself feminine. Perhaps others look down upon on me not wearing the accoutrements of females, but I look at it at as their problem, not mine.

Well said

[Sara Jessica]

It is true that women wear guy's stuff including Boyfriend Jeans, Boyfriend Shoes, men's watches, neckties, men's jackets and many other men's items but that do it as women. They don't attempt to deceive folks into thinking that they are men.

More often than not, these styles are inspired by menswear as part of some sort of a fashion movement. The shoe thing is really "in" right now with heels sporting features you'd normally see on men's wingtips and stuff like that. Not really my thing when I'm looking for heels and I'm guessing it will be a fleeting fad this season that will not stand the test of time.

"Boyfriend Jeans" are simply another cut of denim that works better for some women's figures. They come in all shapes and sizes just like we do. Men's watches? This trend has been around for quite a while but again, it's not about a woman running out to buy a "man's" watch. Instead, you see watch faces that have grown larger over the years. A woman is no longer relegated to the small nickel-sized watch face, she has choices. "Boyshort" panties? Shaped a bit like "tighty whities" but more often than not, unmistakably feminine in materials (ie - lace).

I have yet to encounter any sort of visible trend among women in general to co-op components of a man's wardrobe as their own other than inspiration as I talk about above. Even when I see a woman who I perceive as being a lesbian with more of a butch presentation (which is more of a gender statement rather than one which is fashion forward), I don't pick apart her clothes to see if "oooh, she might be wearing man clothing". I assume it's women's, perhaps plain, but it's really a non-issue to me when it comes to perception.

It is exactly the same as when I wear capri pants, women's sandals, and toenail polish because I don't attempt to deceive folks into thinking I'm a woman. I'm just a feminine guy that likes to wear women's fashion.

Don't get me wrong Jamie, I think I totally get where you are coming from. But by the same token, and I'm simply being honest here, I would perceive you the same as the butch lesbian described above, likely as a gay man...and I'm supposedly enlightened about this TG thing. Your presentation as described is not fashion-forward and blazing a trail for males everywhere to admire, follow & emulate. Instead, it will be perceived as being outlier by most people out there.

OK. Sorry for the rant. When I talk to my friends about this, they all agree. I'll get off the soapbox now. I don't expect to convince anyone here, and that's OK.

You're among friends Reine, and some of us get it.

I haven't worn makeup in at least 20 years. I don't and haven't worn a bra in the last 10 years. I hate make up and I hate bras, pantyhose, and dresses. I wear shorts and tee shirts or pants on occasion. They are ladies clothes bought in the ladies section. I consider myself feminine. Perhaps others look down upon on me not wearing the accoutrements of females, but I look at it at as their problem, not mine.

You are unmistakably feminine despite the accoutrements (or lack thereof) by virtue of the fact you are a woman.

It must drive you crazy to see some of the discussions here on those things you steer clear of. I know some women who have been able to wrap their head around the TG thing and then can fall back on some of the more superficial aspects and kind of "get it". I'm sure you do to but still, I can imagine you rolling your eyes a fair amount!!!

Thank you that is what I want to tell - standard for womens dressing is another and no one cares what it is. May be if one day we have make up, bras, pantyhose, and dresses on mans clothes department somebody will ask "Why there is no more CDs?"

Don't worry, I'm pretty confident in saying that what you describe is NEVER going to happen.

[sometimes_miss]

Women can and do crossdress. It's just that, nobody notices when they do, because they're been commandeering their boyfriends/husbands/brothers clothing for decades.

[Kassandra56]

It wasn't that long ago that women were not normally wearing pants at all. Dresses or skirts only. A woman was frowned upon if she did and considered abnormal.

I was hoping someone would raise this point because it's 100% true. Women wore male clothes back then to make a statement, it was all part of the movement to be accepted as equals to men and gain their freedom. There are probably many on this forum who are not old enough to remember the events of this period in time but a woman wearing pants was considered very rebellious. I can remember walking in our town with my mother and she was shocked at such as sight, a few years later she two was wearing pants but they were cut for women and sold as such.

I agree with much of what has been said. Women are not cross-dressing they are wearing the fashion of the day. The fashion market like every other business is about making money, if there becomes a market for male skirts they will make them and market them as such but I doubt that will be in my lifetime. Therefore as I like to wear dresses, skirts etc. I buy clothes made for women and I'm considered a cross-dresser, my wife on the other hand wears pants, shirts etc. made for women and therefore is not a cross-dresser. I think even if male skirts were to become common I would still buy the female versions because the material, colors and style of the male versions would not be what I would want to wear, so even then I would still be a cross-dresser.