I have had many emotional/ sexual relationships with women. Those where we share things, cuddle, communicate, worry about each other. With a man I have only had physical relationships. When they're done being a sex object, God forbid, I may have to speak to them. I think there's Bi/ leaning toward hetero, and Bi/ leaning toward homosexual, depending on where the emotional side rests. This may seem shallow, but I'll bet it's quite common.-Celeste
While for convenience we put people into boxes called straight and gay—and may argue about how many boxes there are—I tend to believe that sexuality is as fluid as gender. It changes subtly over the course of a lifetime. Young teenagers often experiment within their sexual group, but that's less true for people in their 20s and 30s. I notice as I move beyond the age of procreation (I am married with two grown sons) my homosexual meter has taken a few ticks upward.
Last edited by Dawn cd; 11-15-2012 at 12:42 PM.
Hey Melissa, you look better every time I see you.Originally Posted by Badtranny
That's progress.
Well I think I am still straight any way.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Careful with that. I said something very similar to that once on these boards as a joke, and someone flew right off the handle and landed on me with both feet.
~Melissa
If there is a mathematical equation for it, then the answer is absolute.....NOT!
I'm with Suzy, 100% straight my friends.
For what reason?
Oh... another one of these threads.lol. Are we supposed to clarify our sexual preferences (I'll pass, said it enough). To most of the Cis gendered world any guy that puts on a dress is assumed gay or at least bi. Survey says the numbers are the same as in the general public as far as sexual preference goes.
I agree, it would be redundant to answer this. Freud said that everyone is a latent homosexual, but did he have proof?
It's still being worked on, I need to discover if I'm a gay man or a straight woman.
If I were going by me being a man, I'd say 90% gay.
Don't get me wrong, women are beautiful and sexy... I'm just not interested in sex with them.
:P
I would have to say I'm a lesbian trapped in a mans body, But, I would only consider being with the"plumbing" of a man if he were a cd. But they would have to be one cute cd! Personally, I think my body is cute and I could see being with a really cute cd with a nice body. Better be abld to dress well though!
I would say that I am 100% into women, even when presenting as one. I am comfortable around gay men. I find gay men easy to relate to, I am just not attracted to them.
For the transgendered and transsexual community, that can be a really tricky question.
Kinsey suggested that there was a ranking from 1 through 6, 1 being someone who was only attracted to members of the opposite sex and never even had fantasies about having sexual intimacy of any kind with anyone of the same sex, and 6 being someone who was totally homosexual and never had desires to have any type of sexual intimacy with a member of the opposite sex. Furthermore, the distribution seems to be more of an inverse bell curve, with many people being mostly or entirely heterosexual and a smaller but significant number being mostly or entirely homosexual. However, because Kinsey and his team took detailed sexual histories including both fantasies and practices, as well as repressed fantasies, they found that many who practiced lifestyles that were almost entirely heterosexual or homosexual also felt pressure to be one or the other. Many of those who were bisexual to any significant degree (2-5 on Kinsey's scale) often felt that they had to be monogamous and therefore had to choose one or the other.
Kinsey's research also showed that many bisexuals met different needs with each gender. For example, bisexual women might behave heterosexually, but would enjoy social and sensual intimacy with a woman, even though it didn't lead to sex. Conversely, men might find physical intimacy in the form of certain sports such as wrestling or they might find social intimacy with men, but would enjoy only be sexually involved with women.
Other studies have looked at the types of men and women that the subject was attracted to. For example, some "heterosexual" men were attracted to masculine women such as Kathrine Hepburn, while some women were more attracted to very feminine men. Conversely, some men, when given images of only very heavy set women and very buff handsome men, would be more attracted to the men than the women. They might even be a 1 on Kinsey's scale, but might go for a drag queen, a chippendale's boy, or a feminine boy more than they would go for Rosie O'Donnel, Rosanne Barr, or Ethel Merman..
When you add the complication of gender identity things get even more interesting. For example, some cross-dressers love dressing up and are even aroused when they dress up, but would only be able to perform sexually when dressed as a man or when both partners are completely naked. At the other end of the spectrum would be those who have very little desire for sexual intercourse and may have very little desire to make love while dressed as a man or while fully naked. Their true preference is to make love dressed as a woman, with a partner who will treat them as a woman. They may even prefer masturbation while their male parts are completely covered, and would prefer that their partner was also dressed as a woman and preferred to please her with hands, and mouth rather than trying to use his penis. These would be "male lesbians".
When you start to look at activities, some men might enjoy female domination, including amongst others, punishment. Visually, they are looking at a woman, but they want the woman to act more like a masculine personality. Conversely, many women enjoy being able to be the aggressive masculine partner and "be in charge of it" with a male who is more submissive and feminine. Homosexual relationships can be equally complicated, with femme women who like butch women, and butch men who like femme boys or even transgenders and transsexuals.
When you begin to try to map the sexual preferences and sexual identities of two partners together, the picture gets even more blurry and convoluted. You could have male and female lesbians and male and female homosexuals, or even a heterosexual couple where gender roles are pretty much reversed.
Some of these variations in preference and identity may be a result of delaying sexual relations. A boy or girl who is having sexual fantasies for 6-12 years before finding a sexual partner with whom they can have regular mutually satisfying sex (such as marriage) can explore a wide range of variations and options. For example, I got interested in B&D when I purchased magazines with women in pretty corsets, heels, and stockings. The written articles that matched the pictures were those of female domination, bondage and submission. It got added to other preferences. Sometimes a partner will introduce us to something new and we like it. There were times when a partner would tie me up and really act psycho - and I was amazed at how turned on I was when I was experiencing real fear and being aroused at the same time.
In many cultures, boys and girls are paired up in their teens, in arranged marriages. There is often an older person who help train the couple. First they are taught to interact with each other socially, to talk to each other, even to fight with each other. Then they are taught how to make love to each other, and are encouraged to explore a wide variety of sexuality and sensuality, they are taught to focus on mutual satisfaction. Most of these arranged and supported marriages last a lifetime and sexual intimacy continues even after sexual intercourse is no longer practical or possible.
In the United States, boys and girls are taught to be ashamed of their sexual desires, they aren't even allowed to talk about them. They get no formal training other than the most basic mechanics and minimal training in birth control and preventing STDs. Many males have their first experiences with prostitutes, who just want to get get the money and get them off as fast as possible so they can move on to the next one. Many women have their first experience under duress, they may be acquaintance raped, sexually molested by an older adult, or pressured, some are even violently raped as their first experience. For other women, especially those whose first experience is with a boy who has only done it with prostitutes - the experience can be very disappointing. He's been "trained" to go off as quickly as possible, which means that she's barely even warmed up and he's done. Often people don't seriously explore their sexuality, sexual preferences and sexual identities mutually - until they go to see a marriage counselor - who often finds that they have each formed very strong sexual identities and sexual preferences that are incompatible with each other. Some couples can take turns pleasing each other, others go to an "Open Marriage" and far too often, the result is divorce. In the United States, 75% of all children born in the United States will not be living with both of their birth parents by the time they graduate from high school.
One of the great tragedies of American Sexuality (and probably European and Middle-eastern sexuality as well), is that there is so much secrecy and shame around even TALKING about sexual preferences, sexual desires, and sexual identities. If we were able to honestly and authentically share our sexual preferences, desires, and identities publicly with 10-20 people, and let them share that information with others, it would be more like "This is what's on the menu and what am I hungry for" rather than "I can't tell her about my dressing because she'll leave me if I do, while she's saying "I can't tell him I think he'd make a cute girl, because he would leave me if I did".
Back in the 1980s, they used to have "The Hankie Code" - which started out in gay bars because getting matched up with compatible partners was so complicated. It moved over to the straight scene for a while, but the problem was that in heterosexual environments, people kept lying about who they were - because they wanted the widest number of options. Wearing a purple hankie (tranvestite or transgender) was as bad a wearing a dress. Jewelry such as slave bracelets and ankle bracelets turned into hot fashion and suddenly kinky guys were picking up girls in ankle bracelets only to find out that she was "Vanilla".
Unfortunately, many of the sites that encourage sexual authenticity - are also populated with many professionals. It gets really strange when you have two professionals trying to negotiate the deal, only to figure out that neither is going to pay and both were only into it for the money.
Last edited by Sandra; 11-15-2012 at 05:00 PM. Reason: I suggest that you read the rules about what is allowed on this forum
As someone who grew up playing competitive sports, and having been around naked guys quite a lot, I can safely say I have absolutely zero attraction to men. Women are soft, curvy, sensual. Men are all sweaty, hairy, and dangly. Perhaps that's part of the reason I dress as I do - I find the female form so utterly beautiful, and the typical male form to be basically horrendous, so I want to see myself as beautiful in some ways, and not the somewhat chubby bigfoot looking thing my body is descending to as I approach middle age!
Last edited by Sandra; 11-15-2012 at 04:48 PM. Reason: I suggest that you read the rules about what is allowed on this forum
I make no apologies for the fact that I am incredibly interested in women, period. In fact, I can narrow it down to one woman!!! easy!
And it's not just intimacy that's the issue here. I prefer being with women, or men who act like women, or who are considerate like women. Did I mention I am intrigued with women?
The whole idea of being involved in any way with a male is just...well...repulsive to me in both of my gendered selves. Yuck!
I do understand that others will have different sexual orientations, and that's terrific! just not me!
Not to get too graphic but my wife experimented once on me years ago and even though I found it incredible, she never warmed up to it, so it got tossed and never happened again. Been 2 years since we have been intimate as she lost her interest in sex and intimacy. Been promising to go into sex counseling, but hasn't done anything about it. Still love her though. We have an easy life, just miss the sexual part.
Last edited by Sandra; 11-15-2012 at 04:49 PM. Reason: Read the rules about what is allowed on this forum
If I were a woman, I'd be a lesbian. Does that count asbeing gay?
I know enough to know I don't know enough.
Peace
No.
If you're TS and you said "I am a woman and I like women" then you'd be a lesbian.
If you identify as male and are only attracted to women then you're very much straight.
i would have to admit to being very bi sexual, i do still love everything about a woman, and still love them sexually,
i have also found myself equally enjoying sex with men, both dressed and not,
but i could never have a relationship with anyone other than a woman ..
this make sense to anyone????
You all think just like me!
If I masturbate, am I gay for being a guy having sex with a guy? If I masturbate dressed as Lela, that ought to mean I'm straight, or at least she is.
I'm pretty sure anyone who has sex organs could be forced into "behaving" straight or gay. It happens in prisons, I hear. Now, if our culture or upbringing brainwashes us, that could be forced behavior as well. I have the desire to be a straight man or preferably a "gay" woman, but I can imagine being brainwashed or otherwise forced into having different desires. Do we create our own desires, even at an early age? Did we have a choice of which desires to accept? Certainly we have some choice, at least after we get a bit older. But it doesn't seem we have 100% control over our choices of desires. There seem to be lots of influences around. We can even choose some of those influences, but seemingly again not 100%.
Our minds may be more flexible than we imagine. The central question I like to ask is What is the best thing to do. Being still pretty mixed up, I seldom seem to perceive the answer clearly, but I seem to progress. Eh?
Last edited by LelaK; 11-15-2012 at 06:27 PM.
T-shirt says: "Hi, I Crossdress!"
Those who posted objectively and not how they "feel" are closer to the truth while two who claim they are straight both when dressed en femme having sex with a man and also straight when in drab having sex with a woman are delusional. First let's exclude from this discussion those born with the wrong body to brain
(the Harry Benjamin Syndrome) and those born with body parts of both sexes and instead focus on chromosome balance as already mentioned. Fact: we all have a mix of Xs and Ys which means that we all are part female and part male --- so relax. The problem for a male derives from being born with an extra X or even an extra Y. Such an individual would have smaller male parts and larger female characteristics or visa versa. Studies and research have arrived at an approximate percentage that 80 to 85% of CDs are not gay and will never ever have an interest in their same sex no matter what they are wearing. However there are many born males who actually have a chromosome imbalance or psysiological or ambigender leanings but naturally never knew it while young. But the "trigger" was activated through environmental or other reasons and they became CDs. Then at a later period in their lives they realized mentally and physically that there was something wrong and thus they wanted to or did transition. My point? That 10 to 15% who become bisexual or transexual (or deny it to themselves for years) are what they are for reasons mentioned and not because of what they are wearing. Nevertheless the feminine feelings that are stirred by wearing female clothes probably hastens the transformation that inevitably would take place. The bottom line is that for whatever the reasons may be one is straight, bi or gay for as long as you live whether you act upon or hide it. There is no shame and no apologies --- you are what you are.
Julie
100% Women. Just my preference and love the way women look and smell.
Hey, I didn't volunteer for this, I just deal with it.
While I agree gender and sexuality are independent of each other, me thinks some of these ladies doth protest too much. It is funny how a man in a dress will still get macho and defensive about sexuality.
I have never been with a guy, however I do like the fantasy of being with a guy as it helps me feel more girly. Someday who knows, it will have to be a near perfect storm of events though. Putting a percent on it I would go 90
- Natalie
P.S. that's what part of the alphabet would look like if Q and R where eliminated.
-Mitch Headburg
"If you think you think outside the box, you're trapped in one"
- M.C. Paul Barman
I fail to understand how anyone can LOGICALLY deduce that men who dress as women are not straight, or gay. If I was gay, there'd be no point in dressing to attract a straight man; he wouldn't be interested in me sexually. I'd be trying to attract another gay man, who would also be attracted, only by men. So how on earth could I possibly attract another gay man by dressing as a woman? There may be many reasons I dress in women's clothes, but being gay isn't one of them.
Tony
Understood, but isn't it reasonable to assume that a 50 year old dude who swishes around in skirts and heels and calls himself Marsha is at the very least NOT straight?
Everybody here knows that Marsha may indeed be exclusively hetero but at that point, why even bother wasting breath on the word "straight"? I mean seriously. Why even bother arguing with people about how much of a real man you are when you're dressed like freakin' little Bo Peep? You're a queer one way or another so do yourself a favor and accept it. (oh and for the squares, being queer has nothing necessarily to do with being hetero or homo)
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