Has anyone done this? I'm just putting forward something of a gameplan to tell my wife about my crossdressing and I am contemplating this approach. I think it has some advantages and disadvantages.
First the couples therapy is in the context of a sexual health center, so our therapist isn't a 'generalist'...we have seen him before (though not in awhile) and my wife generally likes him, and we've had productive sessions with him in the past. Also my wife can be, ahem, a bit of a type A personality, and I am, well, NOT...so having someone else in the room to mediate and process what is going on I think would be helpful.
The disadvantage, the main one at least, is that I don't want my wife to feel 'ganged up' on. In other words, my therapist certainly knows my history, and I do, but my wife with the crossdressing does not. I'm not saying that my therapist would be unprofessional and wouldn't be receptive to her feedback--I'm just talking about her instant reaction to everything. And of course, I know that that's only the first step, the first conversation, really.
I've made great strides in the last couple of years but I still can be incredibly timid and flustered in 'deep' conversations like this, i.e., standing up for myself--'playing fair' in the conversation (or, er, argument) but still being clear about what I need.
To be honest I don't think my wife will be surprised that I have crossdressed. She might be surprised to the extent that I want to integrate it into my life without hiding it within our household.
there are a few other issues I might touch on later, but these are the main ones. I just wanted to see if anyone has taken this approach. Thank you. All the best. <3