Sorry, not me. Though I'm leaning towards transition, I'm still a heterosexual male.
Sorry, not me. Though I'm leaning towards transition, I'm still a heterosexual male.
Interesting post, as for me, I am more bi-sexual meaning i like men, but I also have more lesbian tendancies when fully in my femme mode around other gg/tg/ts/cd's. But i also agree that as long as we have our male parts we cannot be considered lesbian. Veronnie2
First, it isn't horrid, many here have or will do exactly that. And yes, in many instances the TG community DOES offend the mainstream L&G community because we are so wishy washy and non-supportive of Gay an Lesbian rights. We also like the perks as in this case where you WANT to be a lesbian and yet, tomorrow you will be a guy who can go about your daily tasks as a guy and not have to suffer the insults and prejudice of being a lesbian You can pretend to be a pilot, but that does not make you a pilot. You can pretend to be a race car driver but that does not make you a racecar driver. You can pretend to be President of the US and if you demand to be called that you will be locked up.Originally Posted by Stephanie G
Ah, thanks for clearing that up, I have so many women friends who don't realize it is just a state of mind. Now one question, when you make love to your wife, do you keep you male bits away from her? If you allow her to do anything with them, then you are a male not a lesbian. If you use your male part to penetrate, you are a heterosexual maleObviously I am not technically a lesbian since I have and thoroughly enjoy my male anatomy - as does my lovely wife. Like I have said many times, for me lesbianism is a state of mindI will remember that when you say you are not gay later. And yes you do offend lesbians when you flippantly say you are one when you have no idea what lesbians go through. You would not say you are of a certain race because you wanted to identify with them. Let me put it this way, one day I was commiserating with an Afro-American friend. Whatever he was saying I said "I know how you feel." he became very indignant and reminded me I would NEVER know how he felt. You, sir, are not a lesbian.Lorileah dear, I am not a straight male and I don't offend the lesbians I know because I don't hit on them or deceive them.You started the thread and asked the original question, if you didn't want want the answer you should not ask the questionCan't we just be at peace? Yes I enjoy getting dressed pretty and making love as a lesbian. Peace, Stephanie G
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
In this case, I think it would be perfectly accurate for you to say that you enjoy fantasizing about being a lesbian. No one can argue with your fantasies.
Reine
Dear Lorileah,
My wife does indeed enjoy my "bits" - a term that seems strangely rude to me. Whatever I say you seem to relish mocking it. Really you did not need to waste words telling me about pilot, race car driver, and presidential fantasies. I thought this forum was for cross dressers to share ideas and support each other, not to belittle honest posts. Almost all the replies I received were supportive and friendly. Many seemed to share or at least relate to my lesbian identity. Many replies also suggested that as long as I have my male parts, I cannot be a true lesbian. I'm OK with that. I just love the joy of my lesbian fantasies that I share with my wife. Why does that seem to offend you so much? My wife and I are very very happy together. We love our gardens, our golden retrievers, our walks in the wood, and our children. We derive an amazing amount of satisfaction from our lesbian love making.
I see that you have made 6777 posts. Hopefully most of your posts have been more positive and warm that the ones you made relating to me.
Hopefully your life makes you as happy and fulfilled as mine does.
By the way we are very close friends with the few lesbians and gays that live in our rural area.
Really I wish you peace. Stephanie G
In this case, I think it would be perfectly accurate for you to say that you enjoy fantasizing about being a lesbian. No one can argue with your fantasies.
Someone here once said "just because you put frosting on your head, it doesn't make you a cupcake", It is flippant to say you are something when in reality you are not.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
So by your definition Lorileah men who have sex with Buck Angel are straight because Buck Angel was born with female genitalia and has not had SRS ?
“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow.”
Mary Anne Radmacher
That would be correct. Just because he looks male, if there is penetrative sex (vaginal) it would be straight. Appearances aside. If Buck Angel has not changed his gender marker it would be straight sex. Unless you know a way to get around that. If you do, then same sex marriages will become a lot easier. Does Buck consider himself gay?
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
When I thought I was TS, yes, because I didn't know any better, as I thought I was really female, but was only sexually turned on by females. That changed as I learned more about why I feel like I'm supposed to be a girl. Now, I'm just a straight guy, who's attracted to girls, while feeling like I'm supposed to be one, all at the same time.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
I'll weigh in on an opinion here.
Buckangel falls outside of the norms for genetic females, given there is only a small percentage of the overall population that is trans. Buckangel knew at an early age that he was a guy and he has transitioned as far as medical science will allow, given that penectomies are nowhere near as well perfected as vaginoplasties. Buckangel falls outside of what most people think of, when they think "lesbian".
Do we spend hours debating the exceptions at the ends of the population bell curve, just to make a point? Words like lesbian and homosexual describe cis-females and cis-males respectively, in addition to describing their same-sex attraction. As far as I know, people had no clue about transsexuality when these words became widely used in the maintream.
If we want to be sticklers, we could form new words to describe someone who HAS transitioned, and who is attracted to people who are same-chromosome, and opposite-chromosome, once we stop debating about whether we "technically" describe their genders based on gender identity or chromosomes. But if we do this, then we'd have to form new words for each variation of intersex too, wouldn't we (XXY, XYY, etc), since intersex cannot be described as purely male XY or female XX? But honestly, who cares? It's a lot easier to say that Buckangel falls outside of any common labels.
Besides ... there is no comparison between Buckangel and the OP's wife.
Last edited by ReineD; 12-06-2012 at 05:40 PM.
Reine
You are quite the labelmaker! lolThe words lesbian and homosexual are interesting. I'm not quite sure if there is a word for a genetic woman who is attracted to a translesbian. Quasi-translesbian? Transophile?
It SURE is my hair ! I have the receipt and the box it came in !
I feel the same way my attraction is to women
Carpe Noctem
Cheyenne Hyde
"You may never exceed, your own expectations, of yourself"
http://s46.photobucket.com/user/MsHyde2u/library/
(the password is feminine)
I'm going to get in trouble for this, but just google the phrase "cotton ceiling," and maybe we can all see how absurd this discussion id. Pretty much most of this thread wreaks of male privilege.
Life inside the music box ain't easy
The malots hit the gears are always turning
And everyone inside the mechanism
Is yearning
To get out
http://sandra-absent.blogspot.com
Yes I do. I have long considered myself a lesbian, in a loving relationship with my beautiful and supportive wife. In the bedroom. she knows I like being a girl, and I dress either in lingerie or wear a nightie most nights. We play, role play, and she is happy to make me feel so feminine, touching me in my girlie places and making me feel good. I can't imagine a relationship with a guy. Just so happy to feel like, and be treated like, a girl.
Yvonne, Thank you dear for your post. I love it and it certainly sounds like we're soul sisters. If I didn't live across the ocean from you (in Missouri) I'd love for my wife and I to met you and your lady. Let's be friends. Peace, Stephanie G
Yes please Stephanie :-) x
O.K., rather than be vague about it all, perhaps you'd like to explain what exactly you're talking about instead of sending everyone else on searches? Or is being vague your way of trying to be more feminine? My ex used to excel at hinting about stuff but never really getting to the point.
Some causes of crossdressing you've probably never even considered: My TG biography at:http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...=1#post1490560
There's an addendum at post # 82 on that thread, too. It's about a ten minute read.
Why don't we understand our desire to dress, behave and feel like a girl? Because from childhood, boys are told that the worst possible thing we can be, is a sissy. This feeling is so ingrained into our psyche, that we will suppress any thoughts that connect us to being or wanting to be feminine, even to the point of creating separate personalities to assign those female feelings into.
Googling "cotton ceiling" clarifies it, but it refers to some lesbians who refuse to accept a transwoman's claim that she is is a woman, in other words, the transwoman hits a ceiling where she will never be accepted as a woman in these lesbians' eyes. It's not much different than the way the rest of society sees transwomen, if they know about the transition (hence the need to move away and go stealth). They think of them as men who transitioned rather than genetic women, at least according to accounts by our own post-op TSs here.
Last edited by ReineD; 12-07-2012 at 03:27 PM.
Reine
What you're saying here makes sense to me, Reine. I think when you throw "trans" or "intersex" into the mix, it changes things. The only sort of relationship I could see myself having right now would be with a transguy. So perhaps I'm "trans-hetero" and "cis-asexual"? It can get a bit difficult, but I'm clear in my mind at this point about what I'm interested in and what I'm not.
Annabelle
I think it's just simpler to say that you're a transwoman who is attracted to transmen, if you want people to get your meaning without you having to get into long, involved explanations.
Reine
On this forum you're right. Among your average cispeople, though, it would still be gobbledy-gook. The lengths you have to go to to explain TGism to them, and even then some of them don't cop on. But really can you blame them?I think it's just simpler to say that you're a transwoman who is attracted to transmen, if you want people to get your meaning without you having to get into long, involved explanations.
"I confuse people. Therefore I'm profound." Or at least that's what I try to tell myself sometimes.
Now that's funny.
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
.......yeah, I agree!
Now that's funny.
My high school sweetheart (two proms, senior & junior years , baby!)
She has a girlfriend she lives and romances with now, and had I know how to figure myself out back then, I would have certainly figured a way to accommodate.......but that was many years ago, and so much water under the bridge.
Oops, I stand to be corrected. "Homosexual" technically does refer to everyone regardless of gender, while "gay" and "lesbian" have been adopted to differentiate between the genders. Although, many people do substitute "homosexual" for "gay" (as I apparently did
I should have been more precise with my explanation, but my point was that the OP is not lesbian.
Reine
Does not wanting to be with another man count? Because I don't like men.
Marilyn Monroe: I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot.
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