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Thread: A Blessing and A Small Problem

  1. #1
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    A Blessing and A Small Problem

    Just wanted to relate how blessed I have been.

    After dating for about 8 months, the girl who is now my wife, and I pretty much knew we were meant for each other. At that time I was nervously wondering how and when I would tell her about my desire to dress in women's clothing.

    We were both still quite young at the time and while "fooling around" one night she actually pulls on my tighty whities. I thought "what an answer to a prayer",proceeded to don her silky nylon bikini panties, and finished off in one of the more erotic experiences of my life. I told her how nice it was to wear her panties and she was fine with it!

    After we were married I would wear her panties often during sex. It wasn't until two years later that I finally asked her to buy a pair that were more my size. Shortly after, I started fully dressing with her and ever since she has bought me anything I wanted and has supported me 100%.

    We have now been married for 28 years. Through that time while I was dressed around her (I do on the side too) we always ended up having sex and that was always great with me.

    Nowadays, many times I will dress early in the evening. We might watch TV for several hours but ultimately she feels that we have to have sex while I would just assume lounge around in my girly attire and I know she would just assume go to bed as she normally does long before I do. When I tell her how I feel about this, she seems a bit taken back.

    I'm afraid that I have programmed her this way and am having a hard time telling her how things have evolved.

  2. #2
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    Sex and intimacy can blend together in a number of ways. I am sure you're not complaining. She certainly has grown to associate you're dressing with sex, and that's great. But it's ok to just cuddle too...and let things go without pressure. Why not talk about it. Just make sure the two of you are on the same page.

  3. #3
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    Well, you definately have a great bride. And such a problem! Does she want sex then, or just assume that it's obligatory?

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leah Lynn View Post
    Well, you definately have a great bride. And such a problem! Does she want sex then, or just assume that it's obligatory?
    At this point in our lives, I would say that the majority of the time she feels it is obligatory. She is a very giving person and always wanted to please me. I would have to say that she was never a highly sexual person. When she was younger, she was involved in an auto accident and had a lot of pelvic injuries. Intercourse was always painful for her. Once entry was made it wasn't so bad but we have had a lot less intercourse than most couples. I have always looked at the arousal from cross dressing as a blessing from God that made us a more compatible couple.

  5. #5
    Gold Member Alice B's Avatar
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    I have to admit thata that is a problem many of us wish we had. That said, I can understand why she may be backing off a bit. As we get older our injuries become a greater problem. The fact that she is 100% behind your dressing is truly a blessing.

  6. #6
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    I would have a heart to heart with her, emphasizing your love for her, but the sex isn't always necessary. Perhaps she feels that you don't desire her now. She may just need ample reassurance. I know my wife always needed it. Hope it works out.

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Fran Moore's Avatar
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    I'm going to try my best to feel sorry for you,.................................still trying........................
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  8. #8
    Aspiring Member Amy R Lynn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Slipstream View Post
    we have had a lot less intercourse than most couples.
    You are assuming quite a lot! A lot of couples talk up their sex life more than what it really is. I'm willing to bet that you are probably average, or par for the course! Hmmm... now I'm assuming!

    I have to agree, this doesn't sound like much a problem! Congrats on being married for 28 years! That's great! And to have a supportive wife is just bonus points galore!

    It sounds to me like you want to do more than just get dressed up and have sex. You need to explain that to her. Let her know that its not that you don't want to have sex with her. Let her know that you would just like to dress up and relax sometimes. I didn't see in your post if you have ever left your house dressed up. Maybe that could something to give you both another avenue. Go out to a LGBT club or dinner and a movie! This would allow for you to dress up and take the focus off of sex for a bit. Not to mention, it is very exciting to do!
    Last edited by Amy R Lynn; 12-20-2012 at 11:07 PM.
    "Oh my God, I realized, it's not that we're screwed up; it's just that we've been trained to thnk so."
    ~Rick Novic, Alice in Genderland

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amy R Lynn View Post
    You are assuming quite a lot! A lot of couples talk up their sex life more than what it really is. I'm willing to bet that you are probably average, or par for the course! Hmmm... now I'm assuming!
    ummmm, maybe, but I'm still pretty sure we are well below average but it's been OK with me. I hope I'm not too graphic for this forum by saying this but a panty hand job always worked well for me.

  10. #10
    Aspiring Member Amy R Lynn's Avatar
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    As long as you are happy, that's all that matters! It just sounds like she needs a little reassurance from you that you still want to be intimate with her. Maybe just not everytime you dress up.
    "Oh my God, I realized, it's not that we're screwed up; it's just that we've been trained to thnk so."
    ~Rick Novic, Alice in Genderland

  11. #11
    Curmudgeon Member donnalee's Avatar
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    After 28 years, it's probably time to "take one (or several, depending on what you usually do) for the team".
    ALWAYS plan for the worst, then you can be pleasantly surprised if something else happens!

    "The important thing about the bear is not how well she dances, but that she dances at all." - Old Russian Proverb (with a gender change)

  12. #12
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I wonder if you are over thinking a problem that is not there or if there is one try talking it over.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

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