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Thread: Sissy vs Transvestite? Is there a difference? What is cross-dressing for you?

  1. #1
    New Member
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    Jan 2013

    Sissy vs Transvestite? Is there a difference? What is cross-dressing for you?

    I'm new to the world of cross-dressing, and am not yet sure what "cross-dressing" is to me.

    The idea of cross-dressing for role-playing as a sissy maid, or for BDSM sounds appealing. However I'm not sure if I would cross-dress on my own, or in the outside world.

    I'm not sure if its just a sexual fetish object, or if there is more to it than that.

    Those that have more experience, could you please share your experiences?

    Did you start cross-dressing just as role-playing, but then it became more than that?

  2. #2
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    Jul 2012
    I never was interested in role playing, I started because at a young age I knew I wanted to be a girl.
    All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?

  3. #3
    Lady in Being (7/20/17) AmyGaleRT's Avatar
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    Jun 2011
    Denver, CO
    You're going to get all kinds of answers on this one, Fred, as the reasons people dress are many and varied.

    I started, mostly, with nightgowns, which is almost a classic fetish pattern. However, I tried moving from those into dresses, and found that I wasn't "turned on" as such, but I felt happy and comfortable, and something about the way it felt felt right. This led to more of these, and building the kind of presentation that could let "Amy" enter the real world...but not as a "sissy" or a "maid," but rather as a reasonably-competent woman. It goes both ways, too; now I can slip into a silky nightie and not go into immediate arousal, but just feel happy and femme. I guess this is "maturity," after a fashion.

    - Amy
    Amy Gale Ruth Bowersox (nee Tapie) - "Be who you are, and be it in style!"
    Member, Board of Trustees, Gender Identity Center of Colorado
    aka Amelia Storm - Ms. Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2018-2019, Miss Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2015-2016

  4. #4
    Member Tiffany Grace's Avatar
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    Nov 2012
    Bloomfield New Jersey
    I don't know what cross-dressing is either, I just know I love wearing women's clothing. I don't have a conscious reason for it, that i know of, it is just a part of who I am. Wish you the best. It is one of those journeys that one starts and for most people there is not turning back. Dress at your own risk. Different folks approach it from different levels. The deeper you go the more fem it gets. Some find dressing a way of experimenting with their feminine side, others dive deep into all aspects of femininity.
    You can't fully love others until you truly love yourself. It is a wonderful journey
    The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present!

  5. #5
    Banned Read only
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    Jan 2011
    Cross dressing is not related to role playing or BDSM. Some may CD during those activities but that is a fetish thing, not a cross dressing thing. I've never been interested in any fetish behavior. I am just a cross dresser.

  6. #6
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    May 2012
    To be honest, the 'sissy' thing never really appealed to me too much. Certainly at times it was a bit 'erotic', but interestingly enough as my 'girl side' has gotten stronger any interest in that flavor of material has diminished.

  7. #7
    Member Ann Louise's Avatar
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    Dec 2012
    Seattle, WA
    I started dressing as young child who had only the vaguest notions of what sex was. Thereafter, as i secretly dressed on and off through my twenties and thirties, I must say it was an Enormous sexual turn-on at times (and I wouldn't trade those experiences off for anything!). But now that I'm "older" I dress simply because I love to. I feel so much more at peace with myself now as my feminine self, even drawing on an inner sense of strength and equanimity that's not as available to me otherwise. I would imagine that many of us have grown through TV to CD to TG periods as we've lived our lives. So yes, it did become more than that, and I'm very thankful it did. Elfin
    ​​ღϠ₡ღ✻ Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡✻ ღϠ₡ღ✻

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  8. #8
    Platinum Member Karren Hutton's Avatar
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    Aug 2005
    South Western PA
    I have to wear womens clothing.... but I don't consider myself a sissy.... I don't get the whole sissy thing personally....
    I reject your reality and substitute my own!
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  9. #9
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Feb 2009
    Northeast U.S.A
    Quote Originally Posted by almostalady View Post
    I never was interested in role playing, I started because at a young age I knew I wanted to be a girl.
    I was/am into role play , to an extent ( little girl know, human imagination), but I finally realized it had nothing to do with expressing myself as the other gender. That part got me to where I am now.

    Nowadays , I just prefer to be just the average woman. It's the social side of me. It feels great!

  10. #10
    Discovering the Gurl Xandra's Avatar
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    Dec 2005
    Must confess, the role playing appeals to me - as does the BDSM; but I like to wear women's clothes because they just feel right.

  11. #11
    Senior Member
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    Sep 2008
    There was a time during my teenage years that it was more toward the sexual end, I think many of this experience this, however now it is all about expression.

  12. #12
    Aspiring Member Janelle_C's Avatar
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    Dec 2011
    Northern California
    I started out as role playing. That's how I got what I needed with out owning up to the fact that I wanted and needed to dress. It's not that I want to its just part of the role. But I think she knew, anyway that was 31 years ago.
    "And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" Anais Nin.

    Live, Laugh, and Love Yourself!

  13. #13
    Member Keri L's Avatar
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    Dec 2012
    Houston, TX USA
    Quote Originally Posted by Shy Girl View Post
    I started out as role playing. That's how I got what I needed with out owning up to the fact that I wanted and needed to dress. It's not that I want to its just part of the role. But I think she knew, anyway that was 31 years ago.
    Truer words (for me, at least) were never spoken. At some point, however, I just wanted to remain dressed, without focusing on the arousal part. And, that's when it got scary, as I realized something much bigger was going on.


  14. #14
    Member StacyPump's Avatar
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    Mar 2012
    North Carolina
    There are many here for whom crossdressing is more about their identity and self image. But there are also many here who just dress for the fun, be it the erotic thrill or the wonderful feelings it brings. Or both. And that's ok. ; )

  15. #15
    Cat's Eye Siren ArleneRaquel's Avatar
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    Jul 2006
    For moi, It's me being the true me. I have desired for over 50 years to be a woman, or at least to live my adult life as a female. I am trilled to be leaving this lifestyle. I have not transitioned and do not plan to do so.
    Fulfilling a Lifetime Dream of Living as a Woman in My Adult Years. Ten Years Living 24/7 as a Mature Lady

    My Love of Cat's Eye Frames, Bangles, Red Lipstick, Nails, & Cheeks, Comes From My Mother - An Irish Beauty

    I'm Always Rainbow Proud

  16. #16
    My name is Carol Julogden's Avatar
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    May 2006
    Suburbs of Chicago, IL USA
    Sissy dressing is a variety of fetishistic crossdressing. It isn't a synonym for crossdressing. Different people have different reasons for dressing.

    I've never dressed for role playing, and I don't care for the sissy stuff. From little on, I dressed because of gender identity issues.

    My name is Carol.

  17. #17
    Banned Read only
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    Nov 2008
    The state of flux, U.S.A.
    Okay fred, since you won't receive messages from those of us here on the forum, here goes. A fetish is commonly referred to as something required (an inanimate object, whether clothes, sex toy, shoe, whatever) in order to get sexually turned on, and without that object are unable to function sexually. So, that doesn't apply to the vast majority of crossdressers. What you write sounds like you want a submissive role as a female, with the attire, behavior, and all it encompasses. Remember, there's nothing wrong with that. Enjoy.

  18. #18
    Silver Member noeleena's Avatar
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    May 2008
    waimate new zealand

    Never did crossdressing as refered to here, or did role playing never did the male or female role did not know what it was to start with, or saw it as most people seemed to. what then was my role, how i saw it, or more like what i saw was, people doing things . there was no only males do this or that & women did other things,

    To me it was ill do what ever if i liked some things say gardening i did it mowing the lawns or doing washing just did it sewing was good i liked that. no matter what it was oven mits or sewing skirts or tops i saw it as i can do this,

    Clothes to me were ill wear what ever to keep me warm, though i hated male clothes,i would not buy them. Mom did, & then Jos, yet did not wear female till the time came to live & be what i have allways been a female, so those clothes that reflected who i am as a person became more this is who i am as a female, who has grown in to a woman. theres allways a part of myself that say's male a mix of both really,

    What does it take to be a female, being born one liveing as one & being accepted for who you are as a person, then growing into a woman,


  19. #19
    Silver Member stephNE's Avatar
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    Sep 2012
    No. Virginia
    Back in the 60's, when I was in elementary school, sissy was the worst "curse" word we knew. If someone called you that, it was like fighting words. I loved the girls frilly pretty dresses, and so wanted to try them on. I just kept my feelings hidden.

  20. #20
    GG ReineD's Avatar
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    Jun 2007
    Not sure about the older definitions of sissy, but in the non-CDing world it is a pejorative term for feminine men. In the CDing world it is a type of fetish, for example dressing like a little girl in petticoats, or a sissy maid or other submissive female.

    "Transvestite" is the latin form of "crossdresser" and both terms are interchangeable. For some reason, many crossdressers in the US believe the term is applied to a fetish crossdresser, but in truth, there are fetish crossdressers/transvestites and there are non-fetish crossdressers/transvestites. "Transvestite" is used quite a bit overseas. In most academic research, the term "transvestite" is used to describe men who wear women's clothing.

  21. #21
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Apr 2006
    The Poconos PA
    We are who we are and what we are. When we try to relate names and labels to our feelings, it becomes difficult sometimes.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  22. #22
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    Oct 2005
    Cathedral City, CA
    From my experience (and I'm an old guy as _48 is my birth year), the term sissy refers to a male with distinctly feminine characteristics. It could be speech, how you walk, mannerisms, how you argue, what upsets you, etc., but it is in the context of a male presentation. Crossdressing does not necessarily have any bearing on how one behaves in male mode. I think you would usually be hard pressed to tell who crossdressed by observing their male presentation. You also may not be able to understand much from observing sissified behavior either. However, sometimes the 2 notions do intersect. I would guess that it would be a fairly low incidence as most here identify as heterosexual. And, judging by their activities, hobbies, etc. I would not guess that they are invested in sissy behavior.

    I identify as a bisexual crossdresser. Many people in the population at large erroneously assume that they can always spot who is gay because they believe that all gay men have at least some degree of sissified behavior. That isn't true either. The community isn't like that. As always, there is a lot of misinformation floating around in general society.

  23. #23
    Junior Member Nanaya's Avatar
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    Dec 2012
    I honestly never got the whole sissy thing either. And too many people use it as an insult anyway. I never saw myself as a sissy, I'm just a boy who likes beautiful clothes, be they male or female clothes.

  24. #24
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    Jun 2011
    NYC Area
    Quote Originally Posted by ReineD View Post
    ... in the non-CDing world it is a pejorative term for feminine men. ...
    It's not so much feminine as girl-like (as in female child) -- being like an adult woman wouldn't be called "sissy."

    In this context, "girlish" is extended to include anything that is considered insufficiently "masculine." When I was growing up (1950's, 1960's), my interest in music (playing piano) was considered to make me a "sissy," as was my reluctance to get into fist-fights. The term is inherently misogynistic, since it's based on the idea that being in any way like a girl is humiliating and denigrating.

    In fetish or CD contexts, I'd say it refers to anything that is exaggeratedly little-girl-like.

  25. #25
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Nov 2011
    Lowestoft UK. Beverley was here.
    No role playing except when on stage.
    Other times just wanted to be a girl, and good at it.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

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