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Thread: Sissy vs Transvestite? Is there a difference? What is cross-dressing for you?

  1. #26
    Jessica Gibson Sylvermane's Avatar
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    CDing to me is a release. I am a transsexual but I am still a guy not matter how much I hate it and that isn't going to change. CDing lets me live the dream, at least as close as I can.
    How often do you daydream about finding a genie's lamp...

  2. #27
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Interesting that Fred posted only this thread, no intro. And something that was definitely prodding some oxen.

    Sissy and transvestite are not even in the same neighborhood, and yet both are words used outside the community to be demeaning and disrespectful. Another you say EEther and I say EYEther thread?

    I will await further threads before I think about this question. Call me jaded.
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  3. #28
    A California Girl Rachel Morley's Avatar
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    There's a big difference between what people will think of the terms "sissy" and "transvestite". Sissy can mean so many different things to so many different people. For example, a lot of non-CD community people use it in everyday language to mean a guy who is not very manly or someone who is a feminine guy, which translates into (for them) a weak guy and so they used as a pejorative term for a boy or man who violates or does not meet the "standard male gender role". Personally, I actually like to think of myself as a softer, gentler, "non-standard" feminine man and so if someone were to call me a sissy, I'd actually think of it as a compliment!

    In some quarters of the CD community being a sissy is to dress in a very feminine and/or emasculated way. It's related to submission and feminization of a male person which is connected to a Dom/sub scenario. Some people see the term sissy as just describing an uber feminine way to dress, i.e a "sissy dress" is often made of satin or silk with lots of frills and lace etc.

    Transvestite is traditionally the older term for a crossdresser. It's derived from Latin: "Trans" means to cross and "vestite" means to clothe. i.e. cross clothe or cross dress. So to answer your question: "Sissy vs Transvestite, is there a difference?" ... to most people I would say the answer is most definitely "yes".
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  4. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rachel Morley View Post
    There's a big difference between what people will think of the terms "sissy" and "transvestite". Sissy can mean so many different things to so many different people. For example, a lot of non-CD community people use it in everyday language to mean a guy who is not very manly or someone who is a feminine guy, which translates into (for them) a weak guy and so they used as a pejorative term for a boy or man who violates or does not meet the "standard male gender role". Personally, I actually like to think of myself as a softer, gentler, "non-standard" feminine man and so if someone were to call me a sissy, I'd actually think of it as a compliment!
    I agree with Rachel and I have no problem with the term "Sissy" because I really consider myself to be a Sissy. I also take it as a compliment.
    You will become stronger in the ways of the Pink Fog. May the Pink Fog guide you and be with you now and forever.

  5. #30
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    Growing up I was called a sissy all the time because I wasn't tough like the other boys. It was meant as an insult. I agree I am a sissy but it hurt to be called one.
    All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?

  6. #31
    Platinum Member Eryn's Avatar
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    There is a distinction between being a sissy (ie. exhibiting feminine traits like compassion) and dressing in frilly "sissy style" clothes. Just because they happen to use the same arrangement of letters does not mean that they are related.

    Sissy is a style of dressing that I don't really relate to, but that is fine. Many who enjoy sissy dressing might not understand why I enjoy being in public in a simple T-shirt and Capris. Vive la différence!
    Eryn
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  7. #32
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    I started with just the desire to wear my mother's slips because I liked the feel of the nylon fabric. Slowly I progressed to wearing her dresses and undergarments and attempted makeup. I never viewed cross dressing as role playing as a 'sissy maid.' I now like to dress totally en femme when I feel the urge. I also like being manly.

    I would say, if you're only interested in being a 'sissy maid,' then I'd say you have a fetish. There is nothing wrong with playing that role. You'll probably encounter women who think just the thought of a 'sissy maid' is demeaning to women. I am conjecturing a woman may think, "Ok, you like to emulate a woman, strange for a man, but, at least you're emulating women in ordinary roles. But, to emulate a role of a sissy maid? Is that what you think of women?"

    You may find it very difficult to venture out into the world in sissy attire. I know there are fetish BDSM clubs for men and women who enjoy that role. If you enjoy it, then partake.

  8. #33
    My Ship has sailed? Barbara Ella's Avatar
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    As you can see, you are getting a wide variety of answers. I started out just wearing panties 16 months ago because it just felt right, and put my mental side at peace, and i became a better person, and lost quite a bit of anger. No role playing, no sexual fantasies. I have spent the past 16 months trying to figure out why it had this effect. And now I know who i am and why I must be feminine, still trying to figure out where i am.

    Barbara
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    I may never get to fly like the other girls, but I do so want to dance, so I continue to climb.

  9. #34
    Cat's Eye Siren ArleneRaquel's Avatar
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    Barbara,
    A truely heartfelt response. HUGS !!!
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  10. #35
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    Never been into role playing (of course I haven't gotten my French Maid uniform yet)...
    For me this is all just an expression of ME. It's how I have always felt, more female than male, and how I love to be. I'm just an average woman at heart, nothing exotic, just me.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  11. #36
    Member Kali's Avatar
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    Evryone has their own story. For me it started with sexual overtones. Now, I dont feel right dressed in male clothes, and when I slip the forms into the bra cups and get dresed for the day, everything is right with the owrld.

    When people refer to me as a sissy, my wife or I will generally correct than and say "No; she's the housewife"
    Last edited by Kali; 01-07-2013 at 05:21 PM.

  12. #37
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    So I am guessing this hit a nerve with many of you since you are still feeding it. No profile, no photo. One post. Hasn't been back since. Inflammatory question and people still answering. Well played Troll
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  13. #38
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    I have wondered if that is the case on a few of the recent postings. I hope not.
    All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?

  14. #39
    New Member Ninotchka's Avatar
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    In my opinion, a sissy is like a little girl, and a transvestite reflects his true level of maturity.

  15. #40
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    I've read the responses and I do not think anyone has viewed the question or post as inflammatory. I've seen some postings here cross dressers wearing French maid outfits. There have been threads on role playing. Yes, the posting may be from a troll, but, then again, there are many times I read threads that make me think, "Sure? You expect us to believe that?"

    Without asking the question, the person may never know where he stands in the spectrum of cross dressing/fetish dressing.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lorileah View Post
    So I am guessing this hit a nerve with many of you since you are still feeding it. No profile, no photo. One post. Hasn't been back since. Inflammatory question and people still answering. Well played Troll

  16. #41
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    I have fetishes, and I have a maid's outfit, but I don't have a fetish for maid's dresses or sissy maid role playing. I think the outfit is super-cute and super-sexy, and I like to wear it. When dressed in the maid's outfit, if I were to be called a sissy or sissy maid, I wouldn't be offended, because that's how I'm presenting. I'm a normal guy who likes to dress up occasionally, so I don't consider myself a sissy (unless dressed, as I said above). However, if my buddies with whom I do guy stuff (watching sports, hunting, fishing, building, etc.) knew I crossdressed, especially in a maid's outfit, I would surely be so labeled.

  17. #42
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stephanie47 View Post
    I've read the responses and I do not think anyone has viewed the question or post as inflammatory.

    So you don't feel that someone calling a Transgender a "sissy" or to a lesser degree Transvestite (thank you media and movies for making the word something to laugh at) as inflammatory? And if you read the first page you will see that Reine made that same point.

    But of course so many here find the word transgender to be an insult too.

    As far as seeing themselves on the spectrum how did they associate transvestite with a fetish when it is used in Europe as another word for Crossdresser. Now Sissy I can see (and yes I know there are several members who fit that fetish) but the broad "Transvestite"? But why not "French Maid". I will await Fred to return with a profile.
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  18. #43
    Part Time Lesbian Diva CassandraSmith's Avatar
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    I've done fetish role play stuff with a Dom and that's fun but CDing been a lifelong thing for me. I only explored the BDSM part way later in life to see if there were answers there. For the most part, it's about the feeling of being more like a woman. Sometimes, I think that in a sense, since we have an X & Y chromosome, we actually are half woman already. Women are X & X so they are way more extreme without even trying. Most of what our culture (America) values is men that are right in the middle--just the right amount of sensitivity mixed with the ability to hunt for food. Of course, this is a narrow definition of gender and for some, it's not about balance but exploring the edges. I was never drawn heavily to the overly masculine side. I tried when I was young though because I was afraid of what being feminine might mean. However, the female was always waaaaay more interesting to me. Maybe that's where the challenge is for me.

    I was a bigot my whole life though thinking that I needed run from my female side because it was inferior. Now I see that it's just a continuum. We celebrate those beef bus guys who compete for muscle. That's just as extreme to me as someone who passes as femme. Why not celebrate that also. Really, there should be a magazine to go with Flex called Swish or Velvet or something like that. I'm talking equal time here.
    Last edited by CassandraSmith; 01-07-2013 at 03:40 PM.

  19. #44
    Complex Lolita...
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    Quote Originally Posted by FredLofthefuture
    Sissy vs Transvestite? Is there a difference? What is cross-dressing for you?
    [SIZE="2"]A crossdresser (MtF) is the same thing as a transvestite. The former term is acceptable in this country, while the latter term is more widely used elsewhere. Some people in America hate the term transvestite because it carries historically homosexual overtones, but I like to think of myself as a “tranny” irregardless of any bigotry floating around. A sissy is someone who is essentially making a statement against masculinity, or male expectation, by exhibiting (via clothing, comportment, or actions) a certain level of effeminacy. However, you can be a sissy and still be a hero, and, in any event, the sissies WILL inherit the Earth. I don’t mind people thinking I’m a sissy – mission accomplished, if you ask me...
    [/SIZE]


    Did you start cross-dressing just as role-playing, but then it became more than that?
    [SIZE="2"]Playing the “role” of a girl in my lifelong autobiographical play sounds like fun, but I really just like to wear women’s clothing. Meanwhile, I am bonded to the State...[/SIZE]

  20. #45
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    I'm new to the forum, and am not sure how I can make it so that I receive messages. I understand that that's what I fantasize about. I'm just curious if I would like cross-dressing outside of the fetish world. Perhaps I just need to buy some cloths and try it out. I just wanted to see if there were other people who use cross-dressing as a fetish object, and for comfort or pleasure on their own (not only for erotic reasons).

  21. #46
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    Trolls come and go and kind of hard to tell one at first but I think this person qualifies as one.
    I sort of sensed this so I never responded.

  22. #47
    Aspiring Member Stevie's Avatar
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    I think the role playing as a sissy maid got me started into dressing. The more I dress I experimented more and more to the point where I'm at now. Glad you posted this I have been racking my brains out on how I got into wearing women's clothes. As growing up I couldn't stand anything about women's clothes or wouldn't touch make up with a ten foot pole. Now it's the opposite.

  23. #48
    Angel in the Machinery ChelseaEcho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tracii G View Post
    Trolls come and go and kind of hard to tell one at first but I think this person qualifies as one.
    I sort of sensed this so I never responded.
    I'm new and even I got the sense that this thread was sort of an oddity on these boards. Heh.

  24. #49
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    To be perfectly frank, in some ways you are ahead of the game if you just keep your crossdressing in the bedroom.

  25. #50
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    If you want to identify as a "sissy" and get involved with scene please feel free, but that's a word I really really hate, and mentally moving from sissy to transgendered caused me decades of pain.

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