I think your signature says it all Katie! You are lucky to have each other.
I think your signature says it all Katie! You are lucky to have each other.
Without out a doubt - in good relationships both partners feel they are the "lucky one". You seem to have a great relationship Katie
Katie your are a gorgeous woman. Inside and out. You are the one that most of us look for but may never find. Your acceptance and support are remarkable. Do I think S/he would have gone past jeans and panties on His/Her own? without a doubt. It may have been awhile but it would have happened. You both have "comfort zones" so try not to push anything. Take things only as fast as you are both comfortable with and always keep the communication open. I am sure we will never tired of answering any questions you may have
Flip Flops were made for Beaches & Bath Houses, We have neither in 2017. Lose the flip flops!
Here's a slightly different perspective, Katie, from one shaped by similar perspectives. If he hadn't met you, he might have tied up with someone far less accepting. This would have led him to hide or restrict his crossdressing experience and, having no one to help him to imporve his appearance, he wouldn't have looked nearly as nice. Or, he might have kept it hidden and fetishistic, never gaining the self-confidence to make it out of the closet. He might also have found himself with considerable mental distress from which recovery would have been long and difficult. In short, you may have rescued him from so many problems.
I had a good deal of the alternate experience. I hid my crossdressing for decades since I had a very unaccepting wife. After divorcing and then getting together with my current wife a few years ago, I was able to finally discover this side of me and improve my physical appearance using her help for clothing selection and makeup. I gained confidence, especially after discovering others through this site and other resources. But I would have been so much better if I had discovered somebody like her at the age of 18 instead of 48. You're wonderful, and I'm sure he appreciates you more than you can ever know.
Miriam
We'll never know for sure will we.
From my experience I would say that it just moved the timeline along a bit faster. I don't believe there was ever a time that I didn't want to go out dressed, but it did take me a long time because I had no one there to "hold my hand". Now that I do, things just keep moving along.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
Katie: YOU, dear girl, are the kind of woman that ALL crossdressers dream about as the one they find and make a life with..... Your hubby is one lucky guy......
Yes from what I have read you both are very fortunate to have found one another, been able to see each other for who you are individually and together. That one question broke down what could have been years or partial to no communication on the subject, questions in each of your heads along with doubt and so on. Good on ya!
Would he have been different? Probably yes, and probably not as happy as he is now.
Let me state the obvious: when two people meet who complement each other as the two of you clearly do, both people are enriched.
My wife also made Tina possible in ways that I could only have imagined, so I do think I have some idea of what your husband feels in all of this. You did the perfectly right thing, showed that you were open an honest, and he reciprocated! What a terrific way to start a life together!
I think that it would have been extremely likely that he would have "gone past jeans and panties". It would have been unusual if he hadn't.
Hugs, Carole
Katie, it has already been said that t may have been different in that he would have progressed naturally to dressing more but wthout you he would have kept this secret and been unhappy, you have given him a lease on life to be free in who he is. Be grateful that you are the type of woman who can be accepting and embrace the love and sharing in the depth of love this gives. To all those who have felt they couldn't be accepted for who they are, I just wish I could give you all a huge cuddle and let you know not every person is as unable to see the benefits of understanding. I always remember a survey which was performed relating to homosexuals (different context and yet very much the same). The one making the survey asked people a question about their views on homosexuality and so many people said about "well if they choose to be gay that's up to them", the responding question was "at what age did you choose to be heterosexual?". Not one person was able to give a response to that. No one chooses to be who they are at a given age, they are just are who they are, be that homosexual, transsexual or crossdresser, society seems to be what makes a person try to hide who they are if they are deemed to be different from the norm. Biologically men are physically designed to wear skirts and females are designed to wear trousers, it is a well known fact that biologically male genitalia should be kept at a temperature lower than the body core temperature, easiest way to do this is to wear non restrictive clothing. So in biological terms men who wear dresses are more likely to be more virile and fertile than those who wear trousers, you are helping nature by encouraging his cross dressing
Katie, you changed his life by the act of saying "hello" to him. Every decision we make changes the world around us.
Now, has the change been good of bad? IMO, the change has been for the better. Anything that helps us understand ourselves a little better is a good thing.
I didn't crossdress actively until age 53. Through the magic of hindsight I now realize that I had an inordinate interest in feminine things that I mixed up with my interest in women. There was always something "empty" that I couldn't put my finger on. If someone had helped me straighten out my feelings in my early 20s my life would have been very different and I would likely have been a bit less frustrated while enjoying it. That is what you have done for your husband!
Enjoy each other, you have a wonderful future ahead!
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
katie
my wife has know about my favorite pastime since before we got married and that has been over 40 plus years ago and to this day we are still haveing fun, in your quest to know alot about a lot of things you have learned his most deep dark secret appreciate the honesty you have together and enjoy your life together
hugs susie
He might have on his own, he might not of. After 23 years of marriage it came out in me. Unfortunately my wife was not too accepting.
Would he be different If we never met?
He would have turned out the same -- a crossdresser -- either with you or without you.
But he wouldn't be *with* you.
If you like being with him, than consider yourself the winner.
In my book, you a winner anyhow, because I think all of us would like to have a SO as accepting as you are (unless we have already found one).
Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.
[SIZE="3"]I'm guessing that you are the only limiting factor on your husband's crossdressing. Especially if he is aware of sites like this where crossdressing is not only accepted but celebrated! His desire to stay in a loving relationship with you keeps him from doing anything that might freak you out. Like getting dressed more often, or sexy lingerie, or heels, etc. You're a gem, he's a lucky man. Keep him honest with your continuing approval.[/SIZE]
Lynn Marie
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