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Thread: Different type of attraction question. Gay or not gay?

  1. #1
    Come and talk with me ;) Briana90802's Avatar
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    Different type of attraction question. Gay or not gay?

    Well there's so much talk on here about having sexual feeling for men while dressed as a girl and if that means you're gay blah blah blah...

    What if you have attractions towards other TG people and CDer? Any feelings on the subject from those that feel the same? Or have opinions?
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  2. #2
    Aspiring Member MsRenee's Avatar
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    Id have to say Not Gay.
    Even wen Im dresses up I have no urge to be intimate with a guy. Friends yes but thats were I draw the line.
    When my girl and I are out and we get a rude comment about who does who, she will stand up and tell them Im her "lesbian" and you can go piss off.
    Shes is not afraid to stand up for me and thats Awesome!!!!!
    Renee

  3. #3
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    If you're a man being gay or bi is pretty much defined as being attracted to the physical features of men, so unless you find male-mode Mc Mannerson attractive then you're probably not gay.
    Though if the attraction is partly because of Long Dong Silver then I wouldn't call myself 100% straight either.
    :P

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member Megan Thomas's Avatar
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    For me it's straightforward - Gender and sexuality are two entirely different things. I have always had zero interest in men. I've often been asked if being on oestrogen has made me feel attracted to men, and the answer in my case is again NO.

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    I feel attracted to some tg people. In my case, though, it is a harmless fantasy type of attraction to someone on line based on a photo, or a post, or both. I don't know how far the attraction would go in real life, especially since I'm not attracted to male plumbing. It is fun to imagine, though.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.

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    I live in a pragmatic world. If you have a penis and the person to whom you are attracted has a penis, that is "gay." You may be bisexual if you also have sexual attraction to women.

    Now, there is the rare case where someone is transgender and sexually attracted to men. To me, that is still "gay" as there are two penises involved. To that rare person, it may be different in their psyche.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    I live in a pragmatic world. If you have a penis and the person to whom you are attracted has a penis, that is "gay."
    ----------> I agree 100%.

  8. #8
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I'm sure Brianna. They call guys who r attracted to big women, chubby chasers.

    Men who r attracted to CDs, admirers.

    Maybe we need a term for CDs attracted to other dressers? Something like, CD, CDs?

    Anyone got a suggestion?
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  9. #9
    Silver Member darla_g's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Briana90802 View Post
    Well there's so much talk on here about having sexual feeling for men while dressed as a girl and if that means you're gay blah blah blah...

    What if you have attractions towards other TG people and CDer? Any feelings on the subject from those that feel the same? Or have opinions?
    Briana, why the preoccupation with this question? Isn't this basically the same question you asked before? http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ion&highlight= which is still an open thread BTW......

    or this one which asks the same question and is still open : http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ghlight=sexual

    just don't know why we need another one, kind of feel we are being overwhelmed with this topic. Some people are and some aren't gay. Who cares? Can't we just give it a rest?

  10. #10
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    I dunno Hon. I feel attracted to and love a lot of people. That doesn't necessarily mean I want to be intimate with them. Friendship goes pretty deep sometimes as a for instance.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  11. #11
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Darla, I am sure there are many others like that too. It is one of the top five questions. And never resolved
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  12. #12
    Silver Member darla_g's Avatar
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    I know Lorileah and maybe its the fact I've been here over 5 years and have seen this exact question almost a hundred times. Nothing to ever resolve, either you have those feelings or not. It just seems so overplayed....and no one ever uses search....

    and here are more that are still open of similar topic and still open :
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    Last edited by darla_g; 02-13-2013 at 01:39 PM.

  13. #13
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    I am dressed when gay, not the gay gay but the other gay gay.

  14. #14
    Silver Member LilSissyStevie's Avatar
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    It's interesting that we feel the need to form "identities" around the things that arouse us sexually. We don't do that for most other things. For example, we don't feel the need to go around identifying ourselves as "pancake lovers" and "non-pancake lovers." We don't have endless arguments about whether people who like crepes are really pancake lovers "in denial." We don't feel a need to justify liking or disliking pancakes by genetic programming even though there may be a genetic component for why pancakes taste good to some people and not to others. The fact is that even pancake lovers vary widely in their tastes. Some like plate sized whole wheat pancakes with gobs of butter and maple syrup and some like those little silver dollar kind with blueberry syrup but as a side dish and not as the main course. Some only like a few pancakes once in a great while and would never identify as a true pancake lover.

    To my way of thinking a TG attracted to another TG is neither gay, bi or straight. It's something else. A guy attracted to a TG is something else. A girl attracted to a TG is something else again. The possibilities are endless and we don't have to try to stuff every combination into one the three boxes: gay, bi or straight. Those are "identities" and political categories that don't really exist in objective reality.

    BTW, I thought Jessica Rabbit was kind of sexy. What does that make me? She's not a woman, she's a freaking cartoon!

  15. #15
    A lady in the making..... Erica Marie's Avatar
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    I am attracted to other cd's and tg's. But I have no attraction to genetic males in male form. I am bisexual and enjoy spending special time with other cd's if we have a connection, but it is completely physical attraction. I dont think I would ever be emotionally connected to another cd or genetic male. I know sounds kind of confusing.

  16. #16
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=darla_g;3111893]I know Lorileah and maybe its the fact I've been here over 5 years and have seen this exact question almost a hundred times. Nothing to ever resolve, either you have those feelings or not. It just seems so overplayed....and no one ever uses search....

    and here are more that are still open of similar topic and still open :
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual
    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...light=bisexual[/

    If I was sitting on a hot rock and it was burning my butt I wouldn't just sit there and complain... I'd get up and move away..... problem solved!
    Last edited by kellycan27; 02-13-2013 at 02:25 PM.
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    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    I live in a pragmatic world. If you have a penis and the person to whom you are attracted has a penis, that is "gay."
    It gets a little more complicated when that person you're attracted to has a penis, but you don't know it because he appears to be beautiful woman. A lot of us here love the look of a beautiful woman, even if a CDer. As April said (post #5), it's harmless fantasy. Many of us allow that fantasy to run on, imagining some sort of romantic encounter with someone who is taken with how we look. It's a sort of self-validating thing: doing a great job transforming that men find you attractive. But, for me anyway, the fantasy comes to a screeching halt when it gets sexual. It's nice to be admired and thought of as attractive, but that shouldn't label a fantasizer as gay. Now, if one is attracted to that penis, or to that person because he has a penis, that's another story. But in a pragmatic world, where everything is real, I see your point.

  18. #18
    Silver Member darla_g's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=kellycan27;3111930]
    Quote Originally Posted by darla_g View Post

    If I was sitting on a hot rock and it was burning my butt I wouldn't just sit there and complain... I'd get up and move away..... problem solved!
    oh its not burning my butt, its more of an observation than anything that it becomes a preoccupation for some people.

    Its just that if being gay or lesbian is EVER going to be truly accepted in this society then we have to STOP making a big deal over it.

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    Quote Originally Posted by NicoleScott View Post
    It gets a little more complicated when that person you're attracted to has a penis, but you don't know it because he appears to be beautiful woman.
    Ummm, not really. Because you know there's still a penis under that skirt or dress.

  20. #20
    My name is Carol Julogden's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jenniferathome View Post
    I live in a pragmatic world. If you have a penis and the person to whom you are attracted has a penis, that is "gay." You may be bisexual if you also have sexual attraction to women.
    I disagree 100%, but so what? it doesn't matter, really.

    What one has between the legs doesn't determine gender identity, it defines genetic sex, and I feel that being attracted to someone because of their gender identity is an equally accurate indicator of sexual identity.

    But really, this is sort of a pointless question to discuss here, IMO. Anyone who has been around the community for any amount of time knows that there's no way that we're all going to agree on this, so why bother? It really doesn't matter unless one has issues with living in accordance with one religion or another that tries to control sexual behavior and gender expression. If one lives in a part of the world where you can be imprisoned or executed for being gay, lesbian or bisexual, it's certainly an issue.

    For anyone else, like whoever you want to like, it's perfectly okay.

    Carol
    My name is Carol.

  21. #21
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by famousunknown View Post
    Ummm, not really. Because you know there's still a penis under that skirt or dress.
    Gay men like men who look like men.
    While I'd hesitate to call someone whose dreaming of ladyboners 100% straight, the thing is if they're not attracted to the natural male image then they simply aren't gay.

  22. #22
    Silver Member kellycan27's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whowhatwhen View Post
    Gay men like men who look like men.
    While I'd hesitate to call someone whose dreaming of ladyboners 100% straight, the thing is if they're not attracted to the natural male image then they simply aren't gay.

    Some gay men like to dress up like girls and have sex with other gay guys who like gay guys who dress like girls..
    Some straight guys like to dress up like girls and have sex with gay guys.. Since they're dressed as girls.... It's not gay.
    Some guys profess their straightness with such vigor that sometimes I wonder if they are trying to convince us or themselves.
    Last edited by kellycan27; 02-13-2013 at 06:12 PM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by kellycan27 View Post
    Some guys profess their straightness which such vigor that sometimes I wonder if they are trying to convince us or themselves.
    ---> Exactly...

  24. #24
    Member andrea lace's Avatar
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    Lets put this as simple as I can if you are attracted to a member of the same sex then you have homosexual tendancies and are more than likely gay. If you are attracted to both male and females and find both sexually attractive then you are bi-sexual.What goes on in your head is simply fantasy and its only when you act on those fantasies that you become bi if you sleep with both men and women. Gay if you just sleep with just men. And a total wreck if you like to dress in women's clothing and make up

  25. #25
    Senior Member Melissa Rose's Avatar
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    Yikes, another definitions and label discussion.

    As long as the sex is totally consensual, no one is being harmed and no laws are being broken, who cares what it is called and what definition is being used. Most definitions can be twisted to fit anyone's desired interpretation anyway. It is often used to confirm, rationalize or excuse behaviors and beliefs. We are overrun with lawyers because we cannot agree on the meanings of words and phrases in every day life so something as nebulous as sexuality and gender is only worse. Whether a co-worker, friend, dinner companion and date claims he is straight, gay or some funky combination of his own choosing matters little to me. I am what I am and they are what they are......

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