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Thread: To be , or not to be....

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member
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    Sep 2009

    To be , or not to be....

    I remember a few episodes of Star Trek when the antagonists "looked" like humans but when they turned off the "covergirl" software, they were some UGLY folks, just trying to look the part. Well, that's us kind of in a nutshell. We look like regular people, we sleep, we eat, we work, but the minute we appear in a dress or skirtsuit, we are those extra terrestrial beasts to the viewers.
    If gay is a chosen lifestyle, people have been choosing it for long before the bible came around. If crossdressing is a sin, then, we've been sinning since time immemorial.

    Reine brought up anew the topic of why we do what we do. The plain and simple (and not so simple) answer is: this is what we're supposed to be doing! The fault dear Brutus lies not in our stars, but in our CHEMISTRY.

    Back in the days when a lot of things were crawling out of the primordial soup, something crawled out that eventually turned into homo sapiens. Everything, and I mean everything is CHEMISTRY (the full complement of proteins produced by an individual of a species is estimated that each human produces approximately 90,000 types of proteins) Regardless of what form your body takes the shape of, it is the internal chemistry that makes it all go.

    Gregor Mendel put the finger on the pulse of genetics about 150 years ago and showed how 2 peas in pod could produce some interesting results. All because of chemistry ( I am really simplifying here). The two people in a pod 5 million years ago got the human ball rolling and what with mixing it up with the Neanderthals a bit, and probably a lot of what would now be considered inbreeding, we wind up with tall people (gigantism), short people (dwarfism) blue eyes (we are ALL related to ONE pair of humans from about 6000 years ago) ( "the principle of independent assortment explains why the human inheritance of a particular eye color does not increase or decrease the likelihood of having 6 fingers on each hand") , people with 6 toes, Siamese twins, brown hair, the Elephant man, and all those in between. It is pretty amazing when you think about, that most of us actually look similar in so many ways considering ALL THAT CAN GO WRONG.
    Fragile-X syndrome occurs in about every 1000 births--and 1 in 700 women carry that gene that produces this: " Most fragile-X males have large testes, big ears, narrow faces, and sensory integration dysfunctions that result in learning disabilities. " I have read that there is a 1:5 chance of a birth defect among newborns.

    People have been cross dressing in every place on earth among every society for millenia so we CANNOT ascribe this interest we have to having been born on the corner of 3rd and Lexington, or our mother's having sniffed the air wafting from the Castro district in S.F. or to the fact that some of us crawled at an early age into our mother's panty hose. How would that explain the guy from ECUADOR in 1940? Or the guy in Egypt 2000 years ago. It can be explained by chemistry though--I'm certain of it. Nature poured too much of x or y into the beaker that is called the human body and we are what you see. Whether that means are we something trapped in the wrong body ---what is the WRONG body? If the world now has more than 6 billion people and half are males and 1 percent do this thing that we do so well, that means about 30 million of us are buying clothes on-line from VS! Are we what keep that stocking and garter business going? It is simply NOT possible ---IN MY MIND--that this can be anything other than we are just another form of human being doing something we were clearly "meant to do". A hybrid if you will. We're the cross between the apple and pear. "Living better through chemistry". (Speaking of apples, if you plant a seed from your favorite apple you will get a tree that will produce any one of 5000--yes, 5000 varieties of apples. The only way you will get the apple you want is by grafting from the tree that already grows the apple you want on to the new tree). Nature is funny that way.
    The other half of the story, of course, is related to what triggers this internal chemical stew we are born with.. So many here have indicated that the "age of puberty" was the starting point. CHEMISTRY again. So the trigger is clearly chemical and when the body is setting the compass we find ourselves going south instead of north thanks to millions of years of the wrong mix in the beaker. What we do is not so bad. It is just that as human males we are not supposed to be standing on a rock in the middle of the river trying to scoop up a salmon on its way to drop off a load of babies. We were supposed to be sitting at the table, fork in hand, eating out peas, and minding our Qs. We are not wrong, the problem lies with the viewer of this program because the "cloaking software" is off, and we look like monsters in some sci-fi movie. We have done the best we could do with the chemistry given to us.
    Musical prodigies are born to ordinary parents, math whizzes come from regular familes and they cannot choose to NOT follow that path because it is in their chemistry. Choosing what seems to be for the woman in us is no different. We are not able to say NO--I want some other chemistry. We are the product of millions of years of mother nature's experiments and there is no going against that. We can choose to play our instruments at home, do our math puzzles on the 64000 dollar question or something else. That is where the problem is--how do we catch that salmon without looking like a big, brown bear. Some of us take the difficult path and fix the body to resemble the internal chemistry. Some of us take some bad chemistry and end it all. Most of us though try to deal with the viewing public who claim to be in the wrong theater---they want to see astronauts on the moon, not invaders from mars. sadly, there is no "one answer fits all". Nature has dealt us this hand, we can fold or play it.
    Last edited by busker; 01-31-2013 at 08:30 PM.
    JUST a crossdresser

  2. #2
    Total Shoe-Hound! :) Theresa_W's Avatar
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    Apr 2011
    Adirondack Mtns. of Central, NY
    Very well thought out. Something to think about. I have to admit, at the beginning I wasn't sure if I was going to stop part way through. But, I'm glad I didn't.

    More later...


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    That is the first time I have ever seen Gregor Mendel's life time work simplified that much

    As Biomed I would always argue that it is the structure and function of biological systems which allows the chemical reactions to occur.

    Trousers were first worn in the 6th century BC by both sexes and generally only by those who were from tribes in the Iranian district that rode horses, and by some in Asian districts. Greeks and Romans who have always been viewed as more advanced in their thinking, especially in areas of advancing humankind, deemed trousers to be worn by barbarians. However fashion has always evolved, much like the peppered moth in Kettlewells experiments. It evolves to fit in with it's surroundings.

    Biologically, males are better designed to wear skirts. The male reproductive organs are external to the soma to maintain a cooler temperature for the production of sperm. Wearing an item of clothing, such as trousers, which holds the testi closer to the body will cause an increase of temperature, so not productive and causes a conflict for homeostasis.

    So yes men should be wearing skirts to ensure they are more likely to produce healthy sperm and aid the continuation of a strong and healthy human race.

    The Scottish have known this for years only we call them kilts

  4. #4
    Banned Read only
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    This might be true if evolution was actually science, but since it is not, this is just so much phooey.

  5. #5
    The best of both worlds Kathi Lake's Avatar
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    Jan 2009
    Right there. To your left. No, your LEFT! Yes, that's it. Hi.
    Your last sentence pretty much negates your thesis - that we don't have a choice.

    Whether the urge is chemically or behaviorally (and yes, I know - more chemicals) triggered, some of us crossdress. Do we have to? Certainly not. We choose to.

    Now I'm not sure if you're the type of person that is looking for an external excuse for why you crossdress - genetics, chemistry, upbringing, etc. - but I have to ask; why is an excuse needed?

    I guess if I saw cross dressing as aberrant, sick, wrong, dysfunctional, or otherwise bad then I might feel the need for an excuse for my behavior. Instead, if fault or blame needs to be laid at anyone's feet, then lay it at mine, for I choose this life. I choose this hobby. I choose this. I take responsibility for my choices and the consequences of those choices.

    Last edited by Kathi Lake; 01-31-2013 at 11:30 PM.

  6. #6
    Loves ordinary miracles SuzanneBender's Avatar
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    Sep 2009
    Over the rainbow
    I don't see our challenges as biological. We are who we are and why we feel like we feel doesn't matter. The issue is not with us. It is with a society that forces multi faceted individuals into a binary system.
    See yourself as a soul with a body not a body with a soul" Dr. Wayne Dyer

  7. #7
    Lady By Choice Leslie Langford's Avatar
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    Nov 2008
    near Toronto, Ontario, Canada
    Aye, but there's the rub, Kathi - and to paraphrase your last paragraph - it is precisely because Western society as a whole still sees cross dressing as aberrant, sick, wrong, dysfunctional, or otherwise bad that we beat ourselves up over this, while women wear menswear with nary a second thought. In fact, some see it as downright empowering on some level.

    As Pogo from the comic strip of the same name once put it "We have met the enemy, and he is us".

    Where is it written that only women get to wear pantyhose, high heels, skirts, dresses, and make up etc.? I don't remember anyone consulting you, me, or any of the other crossdressers out there on how we might react to this perceived restriction. Aside from the pleasurable sensation of being able to wear colorful, unique clothing, feeling the silky smooth sheerness of our hose against our legs, and the swish of a skirt or dress that is denied most "real" men, maybe on some level this is also a form of rebellion against society's strictures in this regard.

    Besides all that, what really constitutes "crossdressing" anyway these days, with the way that fashions are shifting? As more and more GG's abandon skirts, dresses, and pantyhose etc. while we continue to embrace them, can we truly be called "crossdressers" when we are starting to claim these items for our own by default? "Cross" implies going against, but what are we going against if the goalposts continue to be shifted. Will we have to start wearing the women's version of menswear pretty soon to be considered true crossdressers in a Victor/Victoria kind of way?

  8. #8
    Rachel Rachelakld's Avatar
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    Jan 2013
    New Zealand
    All my life, my father always told me "people have a choice", right up untill he got depression.
    Now I work with people with mental "illnesses".
    I've not know of anyone who "chose" these behavioural conditions (OK - except for the druggies and sniffers in the facilities).
    I've also worked with with people with very high IQ - again without being given the choice.
    The choice I'm lucky enough to have today is "Do I want to suppress part of who I am?"

  9. #9
    Member GroovyChristy's Avatar
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    Jan 2013
    An interesting post, busker. The Star Trek analogy makes a good point about how the public sees us, but I think it fails in one respect. I remember some of the episodes when Kirk and Co. would finally see through the facade that their extraterrestrial foes had created, and the creatures were indeed monstrous. When people get to know us however, that is if they really, honestly try to understand us, then they will see that we are anything but monsters. They will see that we are usually quite gentle souls who only want to go about their business like anyone else. There are, of course, about as many reasons for "cross dressing" as there are people who do it (see some of the recent threads on this subject), so that can make things difficult. But still, a dialogue with others is important so that we can try to destroy these stigmas and misconceptions. What we need is a reversal of what happened in Star Trek - a breakdown of the monster facade in order to reveal our innocence.

    Are we an evolutionary anomaly? I don't know. While I accept evolution and can appreciate science, it is not my field of study. Chemistry? Sure, why not? HRT certainly seems to be evidence of this. Of course, for some of us, namely the transgender folks, it is also apparently physiological. That is, an actual female brain is said to exist in a male's body, or vice versa. The scientific aspects of CDing, the transgender community, etc. are certainly worthy of studying and consideration. I just don't really think in these terms, being more of a spiritualistic, abstract thinker than a rational materialist. And as it happens, I do think that we humans have been sinning since time immemorial, but I feel perfectly validated and comfortable with my "cross dressing." In fact, I feel more at one with myself and more spiritually awakened when I am in women's clothes. I believe that this clothing is more expressive of my spirit than most men's clothing is, and my spirit sings with joy when I am wearing them. This is an innocent thing to do. We are being true to ourselves.
    Peace and love, - Christy

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Nov 2011
    Lowestoft UK. Beverley was here.
    If ugly was normal we would all want ugly.
    How do we know that CDing is not the most beautiful thing on earth?
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  11. #11
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Apr 2006
    The Poconos PA
    Any talent or ability we possess can be viewed as either a blessing or curse, depending on how we utilize it and on how we and others see it. The real skill is to turn it around and make it work for us, preferably in a positive, value added way.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  12. #12
    Senior Member Foxglove's Avatar
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    Dec 2011
    Quote Originally Posted by LaraPeterson View Post
    This might be true if evolution was actually science, but since it is not, this is just so much phooey.
    Evolution isn't science? I think a lot of scientists would disagree with you.

    Interesting post, Busker.


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