I've already gone out in NYC so i have no problem with that.My problem is going out from home where i fear being recognized.My neighbors don't at all know about about my 2nd life.And living in a condo makes neighbors close in proximity.
Anyone else have this problem and how do you get around it?
Would greatly appreciate any advice.
Last edited by CarolynO; 02-22-2013 at 10:14 PM.
I live in a townhouse subdivision, I own from dirt to sky and live on a small court and know and like all my neighbors who do not know about this side of me. I just dress completely except for wig, lipstick and earrings. I have a garage with inside access so I just drive away from the house "almost" complete. I go to a nearby parking lot and put the wig on, the earrings and then the lipstick. When done in less than 5 minutes I am off to the races. If I couldn't get in my car in my garage I would dress completely and then put on baggy pants or sweat pants and a loose jacket or coat and do the same thing. I have done this before when my son was living with me. I have also driven to a local parking lot in male mode and did my transition there, dressing and then completing my makeup. It is more work and takes longer, but where there is a will there is definitely a way. It works.
I moved to a condo when i first moved away from home. It had a carport which was always lit. Also i had peopel above me which could see directly into my place whenb they came and went. I tought moving away would allow me to get out but due to that darn carport i was even more in the closet. Whish i had the attitude of not caring what others thougt.
If you do it enough people will just think you have a wife or steady girlfriend. In the old days of phone booths you could have done like Superman and changed there. You could rent a storage building.
I have been facing this very issue for years. I live in a block of 7 apartments and cannot get to my car without going past at least 2 other units, other than jumping over the balcony and dropping one story on a rope.
The shorter way to go, there are 2 neighbours (one who used to go away for 3 weeks at a time) and this guy has a tendency to open up his door when he sees me going past and want to chat, regardless of the time of day or night. I am a shift worker and my shifts can be anywhere in a 24hr period but anyway.
When he's away, I usually would put my girl stuff on, then put guy stuff on over the top and in summer, than can be very sweaty) and if I decide to put the wig on before stepping out, I usually put a jacket on that has a hood, leave it up as I walk past their unit with my back turned to them.
Now that guy who usually leaves, is back for pretty much good and is always home. He has a habit of leaving his front door open with often all the lights on. On one time, I was trying to sneak past him (with my girl stuff on under my guy stuff and carrying the wig, shoes, handbag etc in another bag), at the exact moment I was closing my door, he yanked open his door, yelled out my name and asked was I trying to sneak in or sneak out?.
I am conflicted, I should just tell him to f$ck off and mind his own business if he decides to have a go at me but I don't really want it to come to that. Its none of his business what I do, I don't want to do it around him but as I said, I cant get to my car without going past him. I just want to dress, get in the car and leave and then do the reverse when I come back.
I have given him too much power subconsciously I guess and while I get on well with those guys, if they hated me because of it, I really wouldn't care. At least I'd have the freedom to go out.
Mel
Changing in your car is a possibility. Find a shopping center or a commuter parking lot, park away from the other cars and change. Keep your eye out for moving vehicles.
It's a good idea to have a "boy bag" so you can clean up and change back into male mode before you come home.
[SIGPIC]http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=82706&dateline=137762 0356[/SIGPIC]Linda
I just go a different route. I park my car out front, then, if I go out, I bring it around to the side. After that, I take the back entrance instead of the front. I'm paranoid about being caught, but when I come back, I just walk up to my apartment.
"If you think you can or can't, you're right" -Henry Ford
Like you I have no problem in the city (Toronto) but leaving my condo where I am not out is not fun. Although I live in an end ground floor unit and can use the door next to my apt. I don't drive so I have to get on a local bus that I ride to work. So far I wear jeans and a T, little makeup, a hat (its cold here) over my earrings and discrete nail polish. I don't go out in a skirt or dress even to support group meetings. I'm not sure a house would be better, I always made a point of knowing my nieghbours and all the kids (If your ball goes in my yard go and get it). Things work bettter being friendly, when you need your nieghbours and you will. I suppose coming out is the ultimate answer and I am slowly, a year ago I wouldn't have got on the bus dressed femme at all. Meeting more girls from my city and being part of the community is also a big help. I suppose in another year I'll be out and about and then who knows how far it will lead. The adventure continues, sort of like a bad soap, slow, ponderous, and drifting somwhere.
hugs rita
Dressing is not a choice.
Its a passion.
If you do not mix with your neighbors there is little problem, just another resident.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
Think of it this way: do you notice your neighbors coming and going? I mean from front door to car? Whatever YOU notice is what your neighbors can notice. If the condo is "side by side" you'll only be noticeable at the front door and on the walk. I the condo is clustered, you'll only be noticeable at the front door. Unless you are very tight with your next door neighbor, no one will think anything odd. Who is to say a woman can't be leaving your condo? Don't over think this and be observant over the next few days. What do you see?
Your right, in that, it's a great way to become the center of Neighborhood attention.
Probably, you will be viewed as a Virus, to be disdained and loathed.
So, how thick is that thin skin of yours.
I don't suppose you've considered, stopping the dressing. I didn't think so.
When was the last time, a neighbor, greeted or even spoke to you ? I didn't think so.
On A personal note. I find this is the sort of thingis that separates the Crossdressers from the actual Transgenders.
Crossdressers do indeed have so much "Baggage" .......That being Pride and Dignity.
Probably Heaven and Hell is involved as well.
Your body, will tell you when and what you will do. (read that as will accept)
Your good to proceed with care, as most folks cannot withstand the loss of their hard earning lifestyle for this tawdry and deviant behavior.
Last edited by darkbeauty; 02-23-2013 at 07:45 PM. Reason: Summation
Why worry about your neighbors and give the power over your life? It is not illegal to crossdress. Just go about your business dressed as you like and be friendly to everyone. It is not a big deal.
You will become stronger in the ways of the Pink Fog. May the Pink Fog guide you and be with you now and forever.
I have a similar problem moved three times in seven years my neighbors were and currently are that nosy. In this case had to move they were really watching all the time asking questions who was this or that my doll friends would leave and they would write license plates awful the last straw was the surveillance cameras were installed ,when someone scratched my car wouldn't tell me after violating my privacy . I think if you can look for an end unit where you can pull in and leave from the garage there should be no problem, depends how much of your life you want to tell people, will it effect your job and family?
In the meantime, if your looking for discretion use your best judgement my neighbors made a big deal and made it impossible for friends to come over.
Great point Jennifer.Originally Posted by Jenniferathome
Also, If you don't feel comfortable letting your neighbors know that's perfectly fine...it's completely up to you. I don't agree that you have 'thin skin' if you're not ready to share your CD side with the residents of your building.
My God Princess,You have one very nosy neighbor!.gif "Big Roll Eyes")
Last edited by CarolynO; 03-16-2013 at 04:04 PM.
I have my own stairs to an upstairs apartment in an 8 unit building with two other apartment buildings close by. Normally I park my car at the bottom of the stairs making it easier to get to. After 3 years, most of my neighbors have seen this tall lady getting into one of my cars. Nobody has said a single word about it.
Once there was a teenager from the apartment below standing outside staring at me coming down the stairs in 5 inch heels, I just looked right at him and said "Pretty cool, huh?". He looked away dumbfounded. LOL
Last edited by Lynn Marie; 02-24-2013 at 02:07 PM.
Lynn Marie
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It looks like that's what I have to do Lynn.I'm groundfloor and have a short distance on sidewalk to car.I'm still afraid of being recognized and word spreading to Fam. member.
Last edited by CarolynO; 02-25-2013 at 02:29 PM.
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