It Could Happen to You

[Silmaril]

I had an amazing night last Friday, and I just wanted to share it here. About a month ago, I came out to a close friend of mine, a GG, who has been wonderful and supportive ...as I knew she would be. She has been encouraging me for weeks to pick a night when we could go out as girlfriends on what she has been calling my "Maiden Voyage," a term that has delighted me. We finally made plans, targeting last Friday.

I got fully made up (understated, age appropriate, etc.) and drove over to her house where I was greeted by her and her husband (who also knows and is very accepting). She met me with tears in her eyes, the first first person *ever* to see the real me; I have never presented as a woman for anyone before. She told me I looked beautiful ...which I doubt is true, but she made me feel beautiful; she is a true friend. We went out to a local restaurant. For the first part of the evening, I kept scanning for eyes that might catch sight of me and then give me more thorough, questioning scrutiny.

Not a single person looked twice; people noticed me as I walked past, but then had absolutely no further reaction. I don't know if I "passed" per se; my friend told me I looked absolutely natural, and that she wasn't at all surprised I wasn't getting any further looks. I guess that ultimately the reason I didn't draw attention didn't matter. What mattered was that I was out and about with my dear friend and living a dream: presenting as my real self.

I've read dozens and dozens of these stories here over the years, and each time thought, "Well that's great, but it's highly improbable. I'll never find that." I've been extremely hopeless in the past. Everyone here is always great about offering congratulations and support for these stories, but that's not really why I'm writing. Rather I just wanted to post this as evidence for everyone living like I was: in fear and hopelessness. Even against seemingly huge odds, wonderful things can happen. I've learned that for a little patience, for a little discrete opening up, and for a little prudent risk taking, there can be great rewards.

Have courage, and never give up hope. You never know what the future may hold.

[Jessinthesprings]

That is truely wonderful that not only you are blessed with such a friend, but you had a great night.

[Beverley Sims]

I agree you never know until you try.
Good for you

[Janelle_C]

I'm so happy for you that you had such a wonderful night. Thank you for sharing your night with us. I have told one friend and she has excepted me and is her to support me, but it will be wonderful to go out with a girl friend to dinner. Janelle

[Jodi Anne]

OK I do not know what's up with me (yes I do) but I cry on some of the sad stories, now I have a tear in my eye after reading your happy story. I am so happy for you, keep the momentum going.

[Beth-Lock]

This is such a magic time in your progression. I hope it leads you as far as you ought to go. A lot of negative things have been said about the trials and torment of sex change, but I think it is the day to day easiness not to say pleasure of living in the right gender, that helps so much to sustain one.

[Kerigirl2009]

Awesome, I glad you had a great time

[docrobbysherry]

Going out dressed requires that u either can pass or that u r very brave. Sil, it sounds like u have both of these characteristics. If so, u r a fortunate dresser! I can't seem to accomplish either. Congrats!

[melissaK]

Silmaril, sweetie, this sounds like a CD first time story and I'm glad it went well for you, but, is there a reason you posted here in the TS forum?
Not to be rude, but most of us here did our CDing long ago. Cross dressing doesn't always equate to being TS.
Curious.

[Jennifer Marie P.]

I am glad you had a beautiful evening as who you are.

[stacycoral]

Very happy for you, and it does make a difference wehnyou can be with a great friend to be there, and just make you feel real. Nothing like reading a great story to make me smile as happy as a girl. thanks Hugs.

[Silmaril]

Silmaril, sweetie, this sounds like a CD first time story and I'm glad it went well for you, but, is there a reason you posted here in the TS forum?
Not to be rude, but most of us here did our CDing long ago. Cross dressing doesn't always equate to being TS.
Curious.

Hi Melissa - No offense taken, although I'm quite embarrassed; it may be that it was a faux pas to post here. I believe I am in the place I imagine you were in as you were moving out of thinking of yourself as a crossdresser and into embracing that you are transsexual. I consider myself to be a transsexual, assuming the definition of that matches the description under the link to this forum. I do recognize there is a difference; I've only recently begun to think in those terms as I work with my therapist. I'm somewhat caught between two worlds as I step from one to the other.

Since this wasn't a story centered on clothing but rather is about my first time letting the world see the person I believe myself to be and who I believe I am on the road to becoming, I thought that might make it appropriate for telling here. But I may have been out of bounds with that assumption. I recognize and respect the distinction between being a CD and a TS. I hope my posting hasn't come across as disrespect, but if it has, please be certain I will take more care in the future.

[melissaK]

@Silmaril, Sweetie, I'm no gatekeeper, and the TS forum is open, it's just that we don't get many first time out en femme stories here. It's cool you're working with a therapist - you really MUST if you are TS. Figuring out our TG issues isn't very straightforward in my experience.

And I believe I recall a TS patient story told by Anne Vitale about a late in life TS who fought GD for decades, collapsed at work and in subsequent therapy had to be cajoled into shaving a mustache he'd had his whole life, which I took to mean he'd never been out en femme before.

As for me, I kinda knew my TS stuff at an early age, I just had big issues about self acceptance. My CDing phase 22 years ago was to see I could pull off an en femme look as part of knowing what I might look like post SRS. I had my doubts about my appearance. My en femme experiences were limited and I passed enough. But I needed a lot more "work." So I didn't transition then and I proposed to my wife instead. And 21 years later im back working at transitioning. Well, I'm not you, and you're not me, and you'll find your own path I'm sure.

And as for posting here, sweetie, "passing" is an issue for the TS threads, its really only the intended final destination that is different. But pay attention to this, here, everything is on the line, and the girls are trying to pass 24/7/365 and have a life in the new gender. So some chaffe over some CDers who comment without appreciating the situational differences.

[Rianna Humble]

Silmaril, you have not made any faux pas and your post was in no way disrespectful. You do not need to take more care than you already have.

This forum is open for all to post, although the topics discussed normally only interest those who, like you, identify as TS or those who are questioning.

Your assumption was good, and I am sure that it can encourage others who are at a similar stage of their personal journey. I think that the only confusion came because we were not aware that you identify as transsexual and (without that knowledge) the post looked as if it could have been just as appropriate to the MtF crossdressing forum.

Incidentally, welcome to the transsexual forums

[Aprilrain]

I remember my first time out fully dressed, war paint and all. It was about 3 am and I went to a Walmart. I was absolutely terrified! Much has changed since then. I'm glad to hear you have a therapist, hopefully she is versed in gender issues. Keep us posted on your progress.

[I Am Paula]

Glad you had such a great time. I keep trying to stress- the real world is a much kinder gentler place than so many here give it credit for.

[Persephone]

So very, very awesome, Silmaril! What a great "Maiden Voyage!"

Hugs,
Persephone.