I’m glad you brought this up Stevie because I agree with you.Originally Posted by LilSissyStevie
I am far too private to go into personal details but the whole body orgasm is not just for women!
I’m glad you brought this up Stevie because I agree with you.
I am far too private to go into personal details but the whole body orgasm is not just for women!
Last edited by suzy1; 04-23-2013 at 03:51 AM.
Sweetie, what are you referring too ending? Erections, or sex with your wife? I am concerned because with either one it sounds like you haven't thought all these consequences out before you step into RLE or HRT. If you are in this for the purpose of getting to wear cross gender clothes, that's fine, but you aren't in the same place as TSs. Maybe I am just over reading your post.
The first consequence, poorly functioning male equipment during HRT and pre-op, should be known to you. Lots of websites discuss this. Erections will be significantly smaller, with greater risk of pain during intercourse because tissue is being stretched that hasn't been regularly stretched. And ultimately you aren't going to transition in the traditional sense without losing the external genitalia. Are you trying to keep yours? Why? I don't need to know, but you would. This would be covered in counseling time.
The second, losing sexual privileges with your wife, this ball is in your wife's court if your post transition sexual orientation is lesbian. All you can do is remember to tell her you love her, and continue to act like you're in love with her, if you are. She has to decide if a sex life with sex toys and alternate means of arousal than a warm penis are going to work for her.
But if your post transition orientation is straight, meaning you will switch desired sex partners from women to men, this ball is also in your court. You really need to decide if you can do sex with a woman without male anatomy involved. You need to decide if you can remain unfulfilled by never being held in the arms of a man, and never being tossed on a bed and ravaged. (Hey, I read some chic lit)
And a lot of girls aren't sure of their ultimate sexual orientation until post transition, when they finally let go of all social homophobia conditioning and can act consistent with their long repressed identity. Just because you learn to accept yourself as a TS, doesn't mean you also have let go of all other social moral negative programming about gays and lesbians. So, be patient with yourself, and don't promise ANYONE you will not change your sexual orientation post transition.
This is so sad, and I will count myself lucky.
I agree Celeste, you would think it could be learned. And I think for most of us it can be. But, I know an exception, a very good friend, a cisgendered male, who can't perform in bed. ut he has an exceptional reason. He was severely traumatized in his youth when his Dad caught him during an act of masterbation and his Dad beat the ***k out of him. It was just part of a decade of terror his Dad inflicted upon him as a child. He's my age, and has indelible PTSD. He has been in counseling with psychiatrists and counselors for 30 years, and he married an MD. And he's still not over it. They have raised a family by adoption.
So, Celeste, maybe in the face of some things, sexual orgasm can't be learned. I think mine are really cool, and anyone who isn't fulfilled, well, its worth it to keep trying. :-)
Last edited by melissaK; 04-23-2013 at 09:50 AM.
Hugs,
'lissa
"The second life isn't like the first one, is it?"
"Sometimes, it's even better."
~ Elektra Natchios & Stick, Elektra (Movie) 2005, R. Metzner, S. Zicherman, Z. Penn
Women fake orgasms for a variety of reasons. Sometimes in a relationship you just have to give it up whether you're feeling it or not. Sometimes my partner's urges don't coincide with mine. Sometimes he's taking way too long ( it can start to get painful after a while) .... Faking an orgasm can "expedite" things. Sometimes he's way too quick and I don't want him to feel like he " wasn't up to snuff". I don't have to have an orgasm every time. As I mentioned before... Sometimes the emotional closeness is enough for me to enjoy the experience..... Just saying
the difference to me is almost totally emotional.. my libido is lower but its still there (and i'm 50 yrs old..i'm glad for this)..
Sometimes it's enough already and I just want to get some sleep...
Sort of relevant... Kinda.
:P
Lost in the scuffle here. WHY. Why should it be so much harder for [almost] ALL females to have an orgasm than men? And usually take much longer to get there? Doen't seem very fair. According to at least one expert researcher, Os for women have evolved into a screening mechanism for women to find "better" men. Better as in more likely to make "good fathers". Makes perfect sense.
HELEN FISHER is one name to Google for those interested in the "why" of much of what we do and what drives us and often controls us.
I agree with some of the posters above, This statement is too broad, and it is not entirely accurate. BOTH men and women can experience either mild or intense orgasms. Mild orgasms for women consist of sometimes barely noticeable pelvic contractions while for men mild orgasms are, as you say, concentrated only in the penis.
Conversely, intense orgasms for women originate in the pelvic region but then radiate all through the body and for a slightly longer period of time. And for men, the same thing is true.
I can't post links because of our rules against graphic sexual content, but if you google descriptions for male orgasms you will find some men who most definitely say that the sensation of pleasure radiates all through the body as well.
Also, both men and women experience a refractory period (the short time immediately after orgasm when additional touch is not pleasurable), and both men and women can be multi-orgasmic. And, men can also experience internal orgasms without ejaculating which apparently (I believe the men who describe this) can be even more intense than regular orgasms.
Last edited by ReineD; 04-23-2013 at 12:54 PM.
Reine
Endorphins aside, less mess makes transgasms better anyway
In all seriousness my toes tend to want to curl now. Pity that junk (as in unwanted stuff to be removed at an available opportunity) hurts when it gets hard; that isn't a problem though as it takes effort to even stimulate the little b&^$ard.
the more you anticipate some big magic "female" orgasm you risk being disappointed...
the new equiptment is still the same, its mostly getting moved around..and so you may be surprised at how similar it feels in some ways...
the nerves do get moved, and in general those nerves end up more dispersed, so you have a much bigger area that feels good...and its very easy to make those areas feel good..
i enjoy that feeling very much
but by far FAR FAR FAR the biggest difference is that afterwards instead of feeling ashamed, you feel anything but ashamed
I believe that being able to enjoy relations in much the same was as a natal female helps to re-enforce body congruency mentally, physically and emotionally. Personally I don't see this as feeling the " same" in any way, shape or form. The new equipment weeks as advertised, orgasms ( sometimes multiple) happen. Having that female reflect back at you via relations and or how your partner responds ..... Priceless!
Interesting question. I can not speak for other, especially GG's but I know what I feel. It is hard to explain but also easy. Confusing I know and confusing to me too.
Sex was never exciting for me as a male, I felt left out and lacking. I never knew how good sex could be until I meet my first boyfriend. This man, who I met only a dozen or so years ago, was amazing.
So, I guess the first part of the answer is the chemistry between him and you. Hard to explain but when it's right, you'll know it when you find it.
It was a whole new world how he made me feel having sex with him. Every inch of me tingled, every inch of me had felt a wonderful warm sensation. And he gave me many orgasms during sex and every time we had sex.
There were several mini-orgasms, as my entire body quaked and quivered under his touch and motions. All these minis built up deep inside me, down in my groin area but inside me. It felt so warm and wonderful and was accompanied by a growing wave of warmth and tingling and like mini-earthquakes in my body radiating from that spot to the top of my head and the tips of my toes. Then the most 'mind-blowing' maxi orgasm when he climaxed inside me. My eyes closed, my back arched, my body seemed to just hang in space ... a wonderful place. I don't know if it was seconds or hours but it was just so wonderful.
It felt incredible! I felt incredible!! How could this be? I felt beautiful, sexy, fulfilled and so much more ... everything over whelmed me and I didn't ever want to leave that place. I was just aware that this man had awakened something inside of me that re-affirmed who I was.
I guess the second part of the answer is your lover and his 'experience/expertise' coupled with your ability to let go and accept yourself and all that can happen.
I never knew sex could be sooooooo good! With some men I had been with before, I didn't even fake it cause it was just so bad. But this man and a number since just seem to know how to please a woman and take the time and effort to do it. I've always know I was a woman and some men can reinforce that wonderfully.
As others said, I don't believe it is "learned" it is inside us just waiting. Waiting to be awakened and so the 'right' conditions need to be present to do this. It's not easy to explain. Ah, life's not easy to explain either.
We all seem to make the same journey but on different paths. We all experience things differently. The ever elusive orgasm (wasn't that a book years ago) ... everyone hopefully finds it in their own time.
Last edited by Josie06; 05-12-2013 at 01:41 PM. Reason: Coreection and fix some thoughts better
"Woman is a miracle of divine contradictions.", Jules Michelet, French historian
Take care and God bless, Josie06[SIZE="3"][/SIZE][SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I can relate what a friend who transitioned has told me. She told me that as a male an O was brief as with most other males. Once she had her surgery and had to dilate she found the experience to be more intense. She is still married to her wife and tells me that orgasms are more intense and longer lasting encompassing her entire body. As an experiment my wife and I tried for me to have a non-male orgasm. We finally went on to the usual for me. During all of the stimulation I did enjoy a long lasting O that made my whole body quiver for several minutes. I can't figure it out! It just was, and it was nice!
Cheryl
I have never had any form of treatment, or therapy, but I do experience this feeling you are describing, usually at about 40 minutes in.
I must be doing something wrong. No O's, erections, or interest in sex has been possible since starting HRT. I went into HRT expecting for a complete shut down and I got it. My penis is nothing but a urine transport tube, and nothing more. Luckily, my wife's plumbing was removed and she has shut down sexually several years ago, and now we have matching libidos.
Before HRT though, my plumbing worked perfectly, and could sustain multiple O's before running out. I'm beginning to wonder what Viagra would do on top of HRT. But the "desire" for it has to surface, and my wife would have to be in that mood as well.
Last edited by TeresaL; 05-12-2013 at 09:06 PM.
Wow Josie - what a description! It's fascinating that having the right sexual partner and with the right chemistry one can feel what you're describing. That's a goal to go after. So sorry that he's not around!
As to my experience, I'm totally in the camp of whatever turns you on the most is most likely to get you there best. Trying alternate ways of getting to the big O recently, and experimenting with ways that mimic my deepest fantasies about being with a guy (and with the corresponding toys) allow me orgasms like the ones you describe.
By completely letting go, not concentrating on the orgasm itself but taking a journey each time and playing the feminine role I increasingly know I'm meant to be brings me to that whole body, can't walk, I want more place. And it's also reinforces who I am, and as another poster states, that I'm completely NOT ashamed to be this way.
Yes, great writing Josie..
I tend to like my erotic fiction to have a little more back story though..
Last edited by Kaitlyn Michele; 05-14-2013 at 05:28 PM.
If I could stop biting my knuckles I'd ask how, perchance, you've come by this knowledge... No, but wait, don't tell me....
✻ღϠ₡ღ✻ Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡Ϡ₡✻ ღϠ₡ღ✻
No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent
Well, I was going to respond to this thread but after reading all the post, I can't get the idea of an "O" out of my mind. Now I am going to have to go take care of that. Later!
Hey Josie, go to the writers thread and expand your story in great detail. I need to read and experiment for a real long time. Get as graphic as you can without getting edited. If you do get edited, then PM us all.
I'm only 3 months in on hrt but I've noticed some changes already, nothing major but I've gone from having twinkling toes to my whole face going numb and my eye rolling back. nothing to crazy but a sign of great things on the horizon (it was so hard to not make a pun there).
You might be having a stroke
Wow.You might be having a stroke
I'm all for bad puns but that really rubs one out of the park.
Come on.. Lighten up! I was kidding.
My pun failed!
It's not you - it's me.
NO! It was me... I totally missed it. Well played lol
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