I think that this tread might have been better suited for the 18-31 section, but alas! The powers to be have deemed me too old to participate there
I think that this tread might have been better suited for the 18-31 section, but alas! The powers to be have deemed me too old to participate there
You may be right that us oldies are not suited to planning for the future
There has to be a cut-off for the 18-30 section and that was set by members at 30!
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
It is hard to plan for something that is almost too much to even imagine.
All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?
Merely an observation rather than a complaint. Those 30 year olds.. You can't tell um a thing! LOLOriginally Posted by Rianna Humble
You may be right that us oldies are not suited to planning for the future
There has to be a cut-off for the 18-30 section and that was set by members at 30!
Great point kelly i will not have one until october but still looking forward to being there. Not sure i will be anymore a woman than i already feel i am but know just because i have that still not a free walk into womanhood. I know that will be my next level to win , earn be, or whatever we call it. However for us whom have not been there yet can not wait to be there and i accept the challenges we face. I realize this is not that easy and maybe will never be but i will go to bed at nite knowing i am whom i am and shoild have been 47 years ago. Love to all you ladies marianne
By observation,it seems that girls in the "white collar world"[for lack of a better term] have a far easier go of it than those in the [often more phobic] blue collar world. However,there are always exceptions. Perhaps some people are just better at sticking to a plan[and they do it everyday at their job] while others are more free spirited in their approach sometimes as a product of their work skills. Transitioning while still"at the job",really has challenges if the workworld is phobic,like Melissa's[aka BadTranny] is,like many trade environments. It takes a Jorja to keep them all loving you..Seems like the professional world is an easier go. So,plan to be in a professional environment!
It SURE is my hair ! I have the receipt and the box it came in !
Actually, the prerequisite RLE for GRS is one year. See WPATH SOC v7I would rephrase the title to "SRS is only half the battle"
The standard pre-requisite for SRS is two years RLE
I take offence to that as i have worrked hard for the company as a man lol and woman to be for over 20 years. I am still very good in my job just cause i wear a skirt to work now does not make my brain less in the job. I do not think white collar has anything to do with it. I have been welcomed in my job as whom i am maybe it has to do with blue collar male we are the man
I saw this thread a couple of days ago and have wanted to respond. I have been so busy the last couple of days that I just haven’t been able to sit down and collect my thoughts. Until now that is.
Like anything else in our lives we need a plan to be successful in our post-op life. However, that plan can only be a partial plan. There are many new things we need to learn once we cross that magical line into womanhood. Where our plan fails is that life as a woman isn’t even close to what we thought it was. So yes, make some plans but do not write them in stone or in blood because your plans are going to change.
One of the first things on your plate and I feel strongly about this, is to quit fighting the same old fights that have haunted you for years. Wash your hands of all of it. Throw those old fights and feelings in the trash and move on. There is no room in your life now for them. Today is a new day. Open yourself up and let her come out 110% baby.
Like Kelly mentioned we need to become educated and have a method for making money. If you are going to transition on the job become the best at what you do. Do not give your employer an excuse to fire you because they will at the first opportunity. Become an indispensable asset to your employer. I have seen many girls get themselves fired simply because they did not follow the company dress code. Do not fall into this trap. If you are going to be a professional then be the best professional your company has ever seen male or female. There is so much more that goes into this that I can’t get into it here but I do hope you get the basic idea.
One suggestion that I really like is to move location where you are living even if it is only a couple of miles away. The reason for this is your neighbors will see a woman move in. They have no idea of your past. Keep it that way. If necessary, modify your own story and stick to it. They only need to know the person in front of them. Then, be the person you say you are. Keep it real. If you are Debby pole dancer be prepared to pole dance. If you are Samantha the professional be prepared to show how professional you are. Simple, huh?
The first five years post-op are the hardest. After that you will have seen and handled the worst and best that your new life is going to throw at you. After that it is life. Enjoy !
If you were 28 just a year ago then how did you suddenly get to be age 31 or older?I think that this tread might have been better suited for the 18-31 section, but alas! The powers to be have deemed me too old to participate there
I know, I know, sour grapes.
It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.
I was sent home with surgeon's instructions not to be alone the first 48 hours at home. (Everyone got the same instructions.) To get reliable coverage that meant hiring six 8 hour shifts of personal care workers.
Last edited by Beth-Lock; 06-23-2013 at 04:58 PM.
I am all for it! But,by observation SOME work worlds are a lot less understanding to transitioning coworkers.They have no right to be,but they are. Even in the white collar world,some other employees that are ok with it at work,may prefer not to business travel,etc with you.I know business is business,but it is sort of the same thing women went through just a few years back..
It SURE is my hair ! I have the receipt and the box it came in !
Nope.. The 27 in my screen name denotes my age when I joined in 09. 27+4=31.
( trust me I an an accountant).
I am glad my husband doesn't read these boards... He thinks I am 25
Last edited by kellycan27; 05-29-2013 at 12:50 PM.
Of course for those older like myself I am looking forward to retirement and I already have enough income from that to live (maybe not a fancy life). I have my family well informed and supportive, grand kids scattered around the country etc. Check goes directly into the bank account so even if I travel I still have my income. Should I choose to work after SRS even minimum wages will be fine with me since any income from that will be all extra.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. Mark Twain
At this point, I may need to borrow someone else's plan.
Lallie
Time for a change.
You could always punt, Starling.
They've given up the Punt in Ireland in favour of the Euro
Check out this link if you are wondering about joining Safe Haven.
This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
Never, Jorja! I'm in four-down territory. And sorry about those Browns--a sentiment that is as timeless as the classic apartment house smell of boiled cabbage and Lysol.You could always punt, Starling.
Oy gewalt!They've given up the Punt in Ireland in favour of the Euro
Last edited by Rianna Humble; 05-31-2013 at 01:03 AM. Reason: Multiposting is making a post directly one after another, when you could have edited the additional comments into your first post.
Time for a change.
I "know" that afterward it will not be happily ever after (I have enough post op friends to see that) but I hope I will be able to just live out what short time I have left in a surreal world that is comfortable
Anyone want to buy a bridge??
The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
Chief Joseph
Nez Perce
“Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,
I don't have anywhere to put another bridge, Lorileah, but I share your dream of a pleasantly surreal aftermalelife.
Time for a change.
The biggest thing I noticed about my own happily ever after is that it is not surreal at all...it feels incredibly normal and it feels like I was always "this way"....it feels like I never had those other parts or that other gender role...
I have to really concentrate to imagine it ...and its hard for me to imagine the idea of "Changing gender" after having the idea dominate my life for 45 years...I've described it before as I imagine that this is what being cisgender feels like...I believe this is what true congruence is...and what's more...I have alot of masculine habits...I rarely wear overly female outfits, altho I do from time to time...its usually sweats/jeans/flats..its nothing like what I thought it would be..nothing like it at all
sometimes that feeling of normalcy or congruence is ALL YOU GET, and everything else goes to S@#T(not always..sometimes)....
...you have to be ok with that...
Can't even imagine that right now Kaitlyn but it sure sounds nice.
The idea of attaining mundane normality after a life of inner turmoil is, in itself, surreal to me.
Time for a change.
Normalcy and congruence is all you get, but is that not what it is all about. Finally living a normal life? There is no glamor in being a woman, it just is. If that is not what you looking for then why would you make such an undertaking?
"Never forget the many ways there are to be human" (The Transsexual Taboo)
All you get? That seems like winning the lottery to me.
All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?
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